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Clips from Seinfeld - The Pilot (S04E04)

"I don't like you."
Seinfeld
"...just keep it to yourself and stay out of my way, okay?"
Seinfeld
"I don't think we're gonna have any problem with that."
Seinfeld
"Good talking to you, Tom. Really."
Seinfeld
"Elaine, I can't go on like this."
Seinfeld
"Look, will-? Will-? Will you call me?"
Seinfeld
"Elaine? Elaine?"
Seinfeld
"Do you know how much money I make? Any idea?"
Seinfeld
"What are you all looking at?!"
Seinfeld
"Go back to work."
Seinfeld
"I stink. I don't know what I'm doing."
Seinfeld
"I'm gonna make a fool out of myself."
Seinfeld
"Come on, you're..."
Seinfeld
"I was a total failure. Everything was fine."
Seinfeld
"I don't know."
Seinfeld
"Well, if he didn't take them..."
Seinfeld
"...what happened to them?"
Seinfeld
"- Hey. - Hey."
Seinfeld
"- Any luck? - No. No, nothing."
Seinfeld
"Forty percent, 50 percent, 100 percent."
Seinfeld
"- Well, what about Meta-? - Did it."
Seinfeld
"- Milk of Magne-? - Yeah, yeah."
Seinfeld
"I am not, Jerry, under any circumstances, doing any..."
Seinfeld
"No, I don't think I should go. I don't want to bump into Russell."
Seinfeld
"He called me the other day."
Seinfeld
"We need you there."
Seinfeld
"- Sandi? - Try Elaine."
Seinfeld
"- Elaine? - Yes?"
Seinfeld
"Elaine?"
Seinfeld
"Camp Tioga, 1978?"
Seinfeld
"- Remember? - Right."
Seinfeld
"I think it's a woman."
Seinfeld
"How pathetic."
Seinfeld
"Why? Why? Why?"
Seinfeld
"I know we've had our problems in the past..."
Seinfeld
"- Yeah, he flies a plane. - No, a pilot is the taping of a show..."
Seinfeld
"It's a- It's a new TV show. It's what they call a pilot."
Seinfeld
"What about Davola? Did you believe that?"
Seinfeld
"What was that thing he yelled out, sic semper tyrannis? Is that Latin?"
Seinfeld
"It's my father's wallet. He thought they stole it at the doctor's office."
Seinfeld
"You hurt me."
Seinfeld
"- So what? - I can't eat it now."
Seinfeld
"- George. - George."
Seinfeld
"What kind of stupid show is this?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, he's horrible. Horrible."
Seinfeld
"Got to love the Sein."
Seinfeld
"I hate the Sein."
Seinfeld
"Oh, Donald, you used to like him."
Seinfeld
"- Give me the remote. - Donald."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, he's good. He's John Ritter's cousin."
Seinfeld
"- Really? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"He is? Listen."
Seinfeld
"Come on up."
Seinfeld
"Well, it goes fast."
Seinfeld
"That's terrific."
Seinfeld
"I like his style."
Seinfeld
"He has a sort of casual elegance."
Seinfeld
"But he picks his nose."
Seinfeld
"Nevertheless."
Seinfeld
"- This is Rita Kirson. - Oh, hi, Rita."
Seinfeld
"I'm caling to let you know..."
Seinfeld
"Oh, my God. Did he get fired?"
Seinfeld
"And as my first order of business, I'm passing on your show."
Seinfeld
"Goodbye, Jerry."
Seinfeld
"Yeah. See you."
Seinfeld
"- You know, that's not my fault. - Yes, it is!"
Seinfeld
"Hey, look at this."
Seinfeld
"Nothing has changed."
Seinfeld
"How did this happen?"
Seinfeld
"I thought you were gonna do something. Now you're eating here?"
Seinfeld
"Hey, come here. I want you to know something."
Seinfeld
"Start looking for a job."
Seinfeld
"Goodbye, matey."
Seinfeld
"If you're a man, you don't know what to do."
Seinfeld
"Nobody wants to build a bridge."
Seinfeld
"It's really, really hard."
Seinfeld
"I guarantee you, every astronaut, when he comes back from space..."
Seinfeld
"Death is number two."
Seinfeld
"Why can't I play Kramer?"
Seinfeld
"- Well, neither are you. - I know."
Seinfeld
"Oh, come on, Jerry. How hard is it to act?"
Seinfeld
"- What? - My grandmother's in the hospital."
Seinfeld
"- This is real believable. - You didn't think I was laughing?"
Seinfeld
"I've never been to Mars, but I imagine it's quite lovely."
Seinfeld
"- Why are you pretending to laugh? - We're acting."
Seinfeld
"Well, at least let me audition."
Seinfeld
"He wants to play Kramer in the pilot."
Seinfeld
"Out of the question. How could we not hear anything?"
Seinfeld
"What's with this Russell? What's he doing?"
Seinfeld
"- Sit. Sit down. It's okay. - I really appreciate you coming."
Seinfeld
"Oh, that's okay. I- I don't have much time, though, so-"
Seinfeld
"...I want to apologize for all the phone calls."
Seinfeld
"It's just- It's just..."
Seinfeld
"Ever since that-"
Seinfeld
"- Do you have a ketchup secret? - No, but-"
Seinfeld
"But I want you."
Seinfeld
"God, I hate these mixtures."
Seinfeld
"I don't know why- Why don't they just put pretzels out on the table?"
Seinfeld
"Or peanuts would be good, but..."
Seinfeld
"Look, Russell..."
Seinfeld
"...I gotta be honest with you."
Seinfeld
"I don't like television."
Seinfeld
"And that's your world. That's your life."
Seinfeld
"...but network television, I mean..."
Seinfeld
"...come on, Russell. You're part of the problem."
Seinfeld
"Elaine, we're doing some very interesting things right now."
Seinfeld
"We've got very exciting pilots for next season."
Seinfeld
"Oh, yeah, you know, I've heard of him. He's that:"
Seinfeld
"Did you ever notice this? Did you ever notice that?guy."
Seinfeld
"Well, anyway, it's a groundbreaking show."
Seinfeld
"Really? What is it about?"
Seinfeld
"Well, really- It's- It's really- It's very unusual."
Seinfeld
"It's about nothing."
Seinfeld
"For example, what did you do today?"
Seinfeld
"Then I came here."
Seinfeld
"...and I do have to..."
Seinfeld
"- When are we gonna see each other? - I'm sorry, Russell. I'm sorry, okay?"
Seinfeld
"- So I'll see you later, huh? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"- It's for you. - Oh, yeah?"
Seinfeld
"What? I'm comfortable."
Seinfeld
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