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Clips from Seinfeld - The Boyfriend: Part 1 (S03E03)

"What?"
Seinfeld
"Sure."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, okay."
Seinfeld
"- Who was that? - That was Keith."
Seinfeld
"Help him move?"
Seinfeld
"Move what?"
Seinfeld
"That's a big step in a male relationship."
Seinfeld
"And you feel you're not really ready for-"
Seinfeld
"Well, we went out one time."
Seinfeld
"Don't you think that's coming on a little too strong?"
Seinfeld
"Hey."
Seinfeld
"What's going on?"
Seinfeld
"Keith Hernandez just asked me to help him move."
Seinfeld
"Well, you hardly know the guy."
Seinfeld
"What a nerve!"
Seinfeld
"You see? Wasn't I right about this guy? Didn't I tell you?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, you're not gonna do it, are you?"
Seinfeld
"- I said, yes. - You said yes?!"
Seinfeld
"Don't you have any pride or self-respect?"
Seinfeld
"I mean, how can you prostitute yourself like this?"
Seinfeld
"Are you gonna start driving him to the airport?"
Seinfeld
"- Kramer, do me a favor, would you? - What?"
Seinfeld
"Don't mention it to anybody."
Seinfeld
"I had a great time tonight, Carrie."
Seinfeld
"And I will call you as soon as I get home."
Seinfeld
"Bother? What kind of bother?"
Seinfeld
"I would prefer it if you didn't."
Seinfeld
"- Why? Is anything wrong? - It's over, buddy. Done."
Seinfeld
"Finished. So long. Goodbye. Adios. Sayonara."
Seinfeld
"- Why? - I've been thinking about it."
Seinfeld
"You got no job. You got no prospects."
Seinfeld
"You're like Biff Loman."
Seinfeld
"I went to the hardware store interview."
Seinfeld
"You think I'm going to spend my life with somebody..."
Seinfeld
"...because he can get me a deal on a box of nails?"
Seinfeld
"I thought we were a team."
Seinfeld
"If I ever need a drill bit, I'll call you."
Seinfeld
"Carrie, could you do me a favor?"
Seinfeld
"Could you not mention this to your mother?"
Seinfeld
"You know, I hate to brag..."
Seinfeld
"...but I did win 11 straight Gold Gloves."
Seinfeld
"I didn't mention it."
Seinfeld
"Well, I won them anyway."
Seinfeld
"...you played first base."
Seinfeld
"I mean, they always put the worst player at first base."
Seinfeld
"That's where they put me, and I stunk."
Seinfeld
"Elaine, you don't know the first thing about first base."
Seinfeld
"Well, I know something about getting to first base..."
Seinfeld
"...and I know you'll never be there."
Seinfeld
"The way I figure it, I've already been there."
Seinfeld
"And I plan on rounding second tonight at around 11:00."
Seinfeld
"Well, I'd watch the third-base coach if I were you..."
Seinfeld
"You know, I hate to say this..."
Seinfeld
"...but I really think that we're hitting it off."
Seinfeld
"- Get it? Get it? - Clever."
Seinfeld
"- What are you doing? - What's that?"
Seinfeld
"- You smoke? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"Is that a problem?"
Seinfeld
"She likes him. I mean, she really likes him."
Seinfeld
"- How do you know? - Who wouldn't like him?"
Seinfeld
"I like him, and I'm a guy."
Seinfeld
"Forget that. He's a ballplayer. MVP, 1979."
Seinfeld
"I'm making wisecracks in some nightclub. This guy was in game six."
Seinfeld
"They're a perfect match. They go together."
Seinfeld
"Like one of these brother and sister couples that look alike."
Seinfeld
"There are no bald women around, you know."
Seinfeld
"I know this sounds a little arrogant, but I never thought she'd find..."
Seinfeld
"...someone she liked better than me. But, you know..."
Seinfeld
"You know what I'd like to do?"
Seinfeld
"I'd really like to have sex with a tall woman."
Seinfeld
"Really?"
Seinfeld
"I don't know, 6'3."
Seinfeld
"Wow! God!"
Seinfeld
"See, this is all I think about: sleeping with a giant."
Seinfeld
"It's my life's ambition."
Seinfeld
"So I guess it's fair to say you've set different goals for yourself than..."
Seinfeld
"...say, Thomas Edison, Magellan, these type of people."
Seinfeld
"Magellan? You like Magellan?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, yeah. My favorite explorer. Around the world. Come on."
Seinfeld
"- Who do you like? - I like de Soto."
Seinfeld
"Oh, like they wouldn't have found that anyway."
Seinfeld
"All right. I gotta go down to the unemployment office."
Seinfeld
"- You want to take a walk? - No, I got some stuff to do."
Seinfeld
"I gotta meet Keith at my apartment at 3. I'm helping him move."
Seinfeld
"What?"
Seinfeld
"The guy asked you to help him move? Wow!"
Seinfeld
"- I know. Isn't that something? - Why doesn't he just pay a mover?"
Seinfeld
"He's got some valuable antiques. He's worried they'll break something."
Seinfeld
"Soon he'll have you driving him to the airport."
Seinfeld
"I gave. I gave everything I could, Mrs. Sokol."
Seinfeld
"- Nothing was good enough for her. - Sign here, please."
Seinfeld
"I don't know who she's looking for. I don't know."
Seinfeld
"I'll tell you, she's very particular, your daughter. Very particular."
Seinfeld
"Is she looking for some big hotshot businessman?"
Seinfeld
"Well, I've got my pride too. I'm not gonna beg her."
Seinfeld
"All right. Just sign it. People are waiting."
Seinfeld
"You like baseball?"
Seinfeld
"That was autographed by the '86 Mets."
Seinfeld
"It's funny, because I happen to be very good friends with..."
Seinfeld
"...Keith Hernandez."
Seinfeld
"You know Keith Hernandez."
Seinfeld
"Know him?"
Seinfeld
"Would you... like to meet him?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, come on. Come on."
Seinfeld
"I can produce Keith Hernandez, right here..."
Seinfeld
"...within the hour."
Seinfeld
"All right."
Seinfeld
"You got one hour."
Seinfeld
"All right, Mrs. S."
Seinfeld
"...will be right back."
Seinfeld
"129 West 81st Street, and hurry."
Seinfeld
"You better bring your gloves. It's freezing out there."
Seinfeld
"It shouldn't take too long. I'd say maybe, oh, four hours."
Seinfeld
"Really, Jerry, there's not that much. First, we got the bedroom."
Seinfeld
"We got two dressers and the bed."
Seinfeld
"- Is there a box spring? - What's that?"
Seinfeld
"But it's attached to the headboard, and we'll have to take that apart."
Seinfeld
"Then we got the couch."
Seinfeld
"- Is that a sectional? - Yeah, 12 pieces."
Seinfeld
"Three inches thick. Got it in Italy."
Seinfeld
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