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Clips from Seinfeld - The Boyfriend: Part 1 (S03E03)

"Every time you get the ball, you shoot."
Seinfeld
"I can't believe you called me a chucker."
Seinfeld
"No way I'm a chucker! I do not chuck. Never chuck!"
Seinfeld
"Never have chucked! Never will chuck! No chuck!"
Seinfeld
"You chuck."
Seinfeld
"My God, I'm a chucker."
Seinfeld
"- All these years, you never told me? - It's not an easy thing to bring up."
Seinfeld
"Hey, you know, this is the first time we ever saw each other naked?"
Seinfeld
"Believe me, I didn't see anything."
Seinfeld
"Oh, you didn't sneak a peek?"
Seinfeld
"- Why? - Why not?"
Seinfeld
"What about you, George?"
Seinfeld
"Yeah, I..."
Seinfeld
"...snuck a peek."
Seinfeld
"But it was so fast, I didn't see anything. It was just a blur."
Seinfeld
"There's certain information I just don't wanna have."
Seinfeld
"Okay..."
Seinfeld
"I gotta go meet Newman."
Seinfeld
"- I'll see you later. Have a good one. - All right."
Seinfeld
"Look at this guy."
Seinfeld
"- You know who that is? - Who?"
Seinfeld
"That's Keith Hernandez."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, that's him."
Seinfeld
"- Are you sure? - Positive."
Seinfeld
"Wow! Keith Hernandez!"
Seinfeld
"He's a real smart guy too. He's a Civil War buff."
Seinfeld
"Wow, I'd love to be a Civil War buff."
Seinfeld
"What do you have to do to become a buff?"
Seinfeld
"So Biff wants to be a buff?"
Seinfeld
"Well, sleeping less than 18 hours a day would be a start."
Seinfeld
"I only got two weeks left of unemployment."
Seinfeld
"I gotta prove I've been looking for a job to get an extension."
Seinfeld
"Oh, I'm sure he loves to hear from fans in the locker room."
Seinfeld
"You're Jerry Seinfeld."
Seinfeld
"- So? - What, you're comparing yourself..."
Seinfeld
"...to Keith Hernandez?"
Seinfeld
"The guy's a baseball player, Jerry, baseball!"
Seinfeld
"I know what he is. I recognized him. You didn't even notice him."
Seinfeld
"What, you're making some wisecracks in a nightclub?"
Seinfeld
"The guy was in game six, two runs down, two outs, facing elimination!"
Seinfeld
"Excuse me."
Seinfeld
"I don't want to disturb you. I'm Keith Hernandez."
Seinfeld
"And I just want to tell you what a big fan I am. I love your comedy."
Seinfeld
"- Really? - I've always wanted to do what you do."
Seinfeld
"Do what I do?! You're one of my favorite ballplayers of all time!"
Seinfeld
"Mine too."
Seinfeld
"- I love that bit about Jimmy Olsen. - Really?"
Seinfeld
"Thank you."
Seinfeld
"...with all these ball clubs flying around all season..."
Seinfeld
"...wouldn't you think there'd be a plane crash?"
Seinfeld
"Are you performing in New York now?"
Seinfeld
"At this club on the East Side. You should come in."
Seinfeld
"But think about it: 26 teams, 162 games a season."
Seinfeld
"You'd think eventually, an entire team would just get wiped out."
Seinfeld
"I live on the East Side."
Seinfeld
"I'll give you my number..."
Seinfeld
"...and just tell me whenever you want to go."
Seinfeld
"- Or maybe just get together for coffee. - Oh, that'd be great."
Seinfeld
"Well, it's only a matter of time."
Seinfeld
"Who's this chucker?"
Seinfeld
"It's been three days, and he hasn't called."
Seinfeld
"Well, maybe you should call him."
Seinfeld
"I can't. I can't."
Seinfeld
"- Why not? - I just feel like he should call me."
Seinfeld
"What's the difference?"
Seinfeld
"You don't understand, Elaine. I don't want to be overanxious."
Seinfeld
"If he wants to see me, he has my number. He should call."
Seinfeld
"God, look at this ashtray. I hate cigarettes."
Seinfeld
"Why do they do that?"
Seinfeld
"I'm sorry, honey."
Seinfeld
"I mean, I really thought he liked me. We were getting along."
Seinfeld
"- I know. - Why did he come over to me?"
Seinfeld
"I mean, here I meet this great guy, this ballplayer..."
Seinfeld
"- ...best guy I ever met. - Yeah. I know."
Seinfeld
"Well, that's it. I'm never giving my number out to another guy again."
Seinfeld
"I've given my number out to guys, and it takes them a month to call."
Seinfeld
"Good. Good. Well, if he's calling in a month..."
Seinfeld
"...he's got a prayer."
Seinfeld
"You know, maybe he's been busy. Maybe he's been out of town."
Seinfeld
"Oh, what, they don't have phones out of town?"
Seinfeld
"Pick up a phone!"
Seinfeld
"- Why don't you just go and call him? - I can't call here. It's a coffee shop."
Seinfeld
"- I mean, what am I gonna say to him? - Just ask if he wants to get together."
Seinfeld
"For what, dinner?"
Seinfeld
"Dinner's good."
Seinfeld
"Don't you think that's coming on a little too strong? Isn't that, like, a turnoff?"
Seinfeld
"Jerry, he's a guy."
Seinfeld
"When you're in your 30s, it's very hard to make a new friend."
Seinfeld
"You're not interviewing, not looking at any new people."
Seinfeld
"You're not interested in seeing any applications."
Seinfeld
"They don't know the places. They don't know the foods."
Seinfeld
"They don't know the activities."
Seinfeld
"You seem to have a lot of potential. We're just not hiring right now."
Seinfeld
"...you can be friends with anybody. Remember when you're a little kid..."
Seinfeld
"...what are the qualifications? If someone's in front of my house..."
Seinfeld
"...that's my friend. They're my friend. That's it."
Seinfeld
"Are you a grownup? No? Great. Come on in!"
Seinfeld
"Let's jump up and down on my bed! And if you have anything in common:"
Seinfeld
"You only have two more weeks before your benefits run out."
Seinfeld
"Yes, and I was hoping, perhaps, to get..."
Seinfeld
"...a 13-week extension, if that's possible."
Seinfeld
"So where have you been looking for work?"
Seinfeld
"You know what I've discovered, Mrs. Sokol?"
Seinfeld
"It's not so much the looking..."
Seinfeld
"...as the listening."
Seinfeld
"I listen for work. As I'm looking..."
Seinfeld
"...and listening- I'm also looking. You cannot discount looking."
Seinfeld
"It's a combination. It's looking. And listening."
Seinfeld
"Listening. And looking. But you must look."
Seinfeld
"Can you be specific about any of these companies?"
Seinfeld
"They all blend in together."
Seinfeld
"Just give me one name."
Seinfeld
"One name. Absolutely."
Seinfeld
"Let's see, there's..."
Seinfeld
"Vandalay Industries."
Seinfeld
"I just saw them. I got very close there. Very close."
Seinfeld
"What type of company is that?"
Seinfeld
"Latex. Latex manufacturing, Mrs. Sokol."
Seinfeld
"Latex salesman."
Seinfeld
"The selling of latex and latex-related products."
Seinfeld
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