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Clips from Parks and Recreation - Practice Date (S02E02)

"Wow, that's a thorough history of the teeter-totter."
Parks and Recreation
"What's amazing... You know what? Just ask me a question."
Parks and Recreation
"Just try to get to know me."
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"I can't think of anything to ask you. I'm sorry. My mind is blank."
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"Really? Oh, my God."
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"Hey. Are you ready?"
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"Yes, I am. Just give me one second."
Parks and Recreation
"'Cause, apparently, in 1988,"
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"you donated money to the presidential campaign for David Duke."
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"I got a phone call. They said he would lower taxes."
Parks and Recreation
"How's it feel to lose so hard?"
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"Ree-Ron! You remember my wife, Wendy Haverford."
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"Of course. Yeah, hi."
Parks and Recreation
"Very good, thank you. I just got a pediatric surgery fellowship."
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"Nice. We're celebrating,"
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"Okay. Come on, Tommy. Cut it out."
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"which is way too high for Tom, who is a 3.8."
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"Ten is tennis legend Steffi Graf."
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"Hi, Dave."
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"You're late. And I can see your nipples through your dress."
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"What? No. Really?"
Parks and Recreation
"In nursing school, we took a psych course on how to treat phobias"
Parks and Recreation
"they would immerse you in a tank of snakes."
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"Okay."
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"What? I don't know."
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"Hey, look. There's bread. You want some? Oh, no!"
Parks and Recreation
"I got flowers in your soup. I'm so sorry. Come on!"
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"Just... I have to go to the whiz palace."
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"It's a bathroom! It's called a bathroom!"
Parks and Recreation
"that your adoptive mother was arrested for marijuana possession."
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"What?"
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"I really didn't wanna play."
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"That was not my intention."
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"It's not your fault. He totally baited you"
Parks and Recreation
"Tom-ato sauce."
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"Do be seated and congratulate me."
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"I just found out, through some pretty impressive investigating,"
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"that your wedding was a sham. It's a green card marriage."
Parks and Recreation
"That's crazy. I was born in South Carolina. These colors don't run, baby."
Parks and Recreation
"Her visa was set to expire the day after you got married"
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"Now, come on. Don't worry. I'm not gonna turn you in."
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"Just admit that when it comes to digging up dirt,"
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"No. I'll have your wife tonight."
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"What?"
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"I'm just kidding. Get out of here."
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"Why would you say that, Dave? That dog was, like, my best friend."
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"And when she died, it was one of..."
Parks and Recreation
"Hey, Tiffany."
Parks and Recreation
"'cause I'm on a date with this drip."
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"We're just two people trying to go on a date."
Parks and Recreation
"It's supposed to be fun. It's just a date."
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"But now you see that even if everything goes wrong, you'll survive."
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"Well, well, well."
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"You coy bastard."
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"Mark."
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"No. I think Ron is fine."
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"So, we're on the same page."
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"You gotta help me take this guy down."
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"There's gotta be something on him."
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"Tom, I'm starting to feel kind of gross about this game."
Parks and Recreation
"He hangs out at a bar in Eagleton."
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"Thanks, man. I'm gonna dig up so much dirt on this guy,"
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"It sounded snappier in my head. Yeah."
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"Ann is so awesome."
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"I'm lucky to have a friend"
Parks and Recreation
"who would spend a whole day being so mean to me."
Parks and Recreation
"Catch."
Parks and Recreation
"Good. You're officially first date-proof."
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"Thank you, Dave."
Parks and Recreation
"You're cool and you're sexy and you're funny and you're smart..."
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"Yeah. Look, any guy would be lucky"
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"Yeah. I am awesome."
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"Yeah, and you are, too."
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"Okay. You're awesome."
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"Help, police! Help! Help!"
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"Hey."
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"and you're lucky to have me."
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"And I think our first date tomorrow is gonna go awesome,"
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"I'm not scared. Can I come and sit down for a little bit?"
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"I don't know..."
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"I do know. I'm coming inside. So, move, okay?"
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"You make a better door than a guy."
Parks and Recreation
"This is gonna sound weird. I'm looking for a guy named Duke Silver."
Parks and Recreation
"Thank you, Dwayne."
Parks and Recreation
"with you lovely ladies."
Parks and Recreation
"Ann was helping me because I was panicking about tomorrow."
Parks and Recreation
"Well, did I say something to make you worry about..."
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"Just the whole idea of first dates just kind of freak me out."
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"But not anymore."
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"I mean, you should be scared of me."
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"Okay."
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"I think I need to return this sweater."
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"Okay, I think that's a sweater-shirt combo."
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"He wants me. I can totally tell that he wants me."
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"I'm right here. You know I'm here, right?"
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"Did you see my bra? Mmm? Bee, boop."
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"Guess what? I'm wearing the hot one tomorrow, the black one."
Parks and Recreation
"Look, maybe I ought to give you a lift home."
Parks and Recreation
"Good. Well, in London, they call elevators "lifts.""
Parks and Recreation
"Okay? Okay. Let's go..."
Parks and Recreation
"Okay. ...down to the pub..."
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"That's right. To the pub. ...get a pint."
Parks and Recreation
"in The Beatles records. Okay, yeah. That's..."
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"What I cannot believe is Dexhart's wife."
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"I think Dexhart's credibility..."
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"Uh-huh. Nothing insane. When I tell you what..."
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"What the hell are you doing?"
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"What I'm doing is, I'm trying to tell you that I've done some stuff"
Parks and Recreation
"that I'm not very proud of. But I like you."
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"So, I would rather you not find out about this"
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"This was a bad idea."
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"to sort of balance the scales?"
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"to brag about getting laid when he was 16, so I shot him."
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"It's been a real gift making sonic love to you tonight."
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"Thank you. Good night."
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"Duke! Huge fan."
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"but I have worked pretty hard to cultivate a certain authoritative,"
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"Sure."
Parks and Recreation
"Say, "I bested you!""
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"I bested you."
Parks and Recreation
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