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Clips from Eastbound & Down - Short (S02E02)

TV Series 2009 –2013 Season 2, Episode 5 30 min ★ 8.2/10 (71,599 ratings) 439 clips
Drama Comedy Sport

Episodes from this show

Oh, I have my resources.
"Oh, I have my resources."
Eastbound & Down
This old thing? You bet your ass. I paid cash for the motherfucker.
"This old thing? You bet your ass. I paid cash for the motherfucker."
Eastbound & Down
Bought it with an advance that I was paid for this...
"Bought it with an advance that I was paid for this..."
Eastbound & Down
I pretty much saved my pennies from my major league days.
"I pretty much saved my pennies from my major league days."
Eastbound & Down
I got so much income, I'm having to hide all the shit outside the house.
"I got so much income, I'm having to hide all the shit outside the house."
Eastbound & Down
...or something and... - Who's the poon?
"...or something and... - Who's the poon?"
Eastbound & Down
His dead assistant.
"His dead assistant."
Eastbound & Down
After mastering the art of agriculture...
"After mastering the art of agriculture..."
Eastbound & Down
...I've grown bored with it, hence its neglect.
"...I've grown bored with it, hence its neglect."
Eastbound & Down
This is my getting-around-town ride.
"This is my getting-around-town ride."
Eastbound & Down
A little beat up but still a classic.
"A little beat up but still a classic."
Eastbound & Down
...but you already knew that.
"...but you already knew that."
Eastbound & Down
That's why I have a plane and also a boat.
"That's why I have a plane and also a boat."
Eastbound & Down
Keep an eye on the whip. Make sure none of the villagers try to fuck with it.
"Keep an eye on the whip. Make sure none of the villagers try to fuck with it."
Eastbound & Down
Oh.
"Oh."
Eastbound & Down
He's rolling through Mexico with the Harlem Globetrotters.
"He's rolling through Mexico with the Harlem Globetrotters."
Eastbound & Down
Ha, ha. I'm just dicking with you, Kenny.
"Ha, ha. I'm just dicking with you, Kenny."
Eastbound & Down
Yeah, he's my kid from up in the States.
"Yeah, he's my kid from up in the States."
Eastbound & Down
I'm a professional baseball player. You probably have heard of me.
"I'm a professional baseball player. You probably have heard of me."
Eastbound & Down
Who's this nerd?
"Who's this nerd?"
Eastbound & Down
Casper don't talk much.
"Casper don't talk much."
Eastbound & Down
...honestly, I feel like most teens these days talk too much anyway. Heh.
"...honestly, I feel like most teens these days talk too much anyway. Heh."
Eastbound & Down
Yeah, well, that one's your brother.
"Yeah, well, that one's your brother."
Eastbound & Down
Yeah, y'all both came out of this old man's jizz.
"Yeah, y'all both came out of this old man's jizz."
Eastbound & Down
Hey, how's the bonding going, big guy?
"Hey, how's the bonding going, big guy?"
Eastbound & Down
- Maria? - No.
"- Maria? - No."
Eastbound & Down
Bitch. You're out here talking to Maria?
"Bitch. You're out here talking to Maria?"
Eastbound & Down
- I'm talking to my mom. - Fuck your mom.
"- I'm talking to my mom. - Fuck your mom."
Eastbound & Down
- Got you. - Yeah, Stevie?
"- Got you. - Yeah, Stevie?"
Eastbound & Down
Please don't make me put a time limit on all this emotional discovery.
"Please don't make me put a time limit on all this emotional discovery."
Eastbound & Down
- Good luck. - Be quiet. Thank you.
"- Good luck. - Be quiet. Thank you."
Eastbound & Down
I'm just making some shit for my fucking house party next week.
"I'm just making some shit for my fucking house party next week."
Eastbound & Down
Honestly, I can't say I blame you.
"Honestly, I can't say I blame you."
Eastbound & Down
Seems like you've had things pretty good here...
"Seems like you've had things pretty good here..."
Eastbound & Down
Casper, I'm not letting anything stand in the way of me bonding with that man...
"Casper, I'm not letting anything stand in the way of me bonding with that man..."
Eastbound & Down
...do you understand me? - You wanna come to my party?
"...do you understand me? - You wanna come to my party?"
Eastbound & Down
This isn't over with me and you, dude.
"This isn't over with me and you, dude."
Eastbound & Down
Well, there you are. My two boys.
"Well, there you are. My two boys."
Eastbound & Down
- I'd love to. - Let's go.
"- I'd love to. - Let's go."
Eastbound & Down
And how are all you fine people today?
"And how are all you fine people today?"
Eastbound & Down
Everybody ready to have some fun?
"Everybody ready to have some fun?"
Eastbound & Down
...unspoiled nature that is Mexico.
"...unspoiled nature that is Mexico."
Eastbound & Down
Well, all right.
"Well, all right."
Eastbound & Down
You can take in the scenery or go for a swim if you like.
"You can take in the scenery or go for a swim if you like."
Eastbound & Down
Also, Casper here is available...
"Also, Casper here is available..."
Eastbound & Down
Take your pictures. Five bucks a pop.
"Take your pictures. Five bucks a pop."
Eastbound & Down
Uh, cash only please. Thank you.
"Uh, cash only please. Thank you."
Eastbound & Down
Maybe it's something in our blood that we can just get hard...
"Maybe it's something in our blood that we can just get hard..."
Eastbound & Down
...on a Jet Ski?
"...on a Jet Ski?"
Eastbound & Down
Man, you got me there. I have not.
"Man, you got me there. I have not."
Eastbound & Down
Goddamn, that would be awesome.
"Goddamn, that would be awesome."
Eastbound & Down
I'd like that. Yeah.
"I'd like that. Yeah."
Eastbound & Down
Whoo! Cheeseburger in paradise.
"Whoo! Cheeseburger in paradise."
Eastbound & Down
- How fucking badass is he? - Fuck, man.
"- How fucking badass is he? - Fuck, man."
Eastbound & Down
Cheeseburgers in paradise.
"Cheeseburgers in paradise."
Eastbound & Down
It's been real nice having you here.
"It's been real nice having you here."
Eastbound & Down
But you got your own money. I can relax around you.
"But you got your own money. I can relax around you."
Eastbound & Down
- I bullshitted you, Pop. - What are you talking about?
"- I bullshitted you, Pop. - What are you talking about?"
Eastbound & Down
The love of my life married some other dude.
"The love of my life married some other dude."
Eastbound & Down
- You stole that Lambo? - Mm-hm.
"- You stole that Lambo? - Mm-hm."
Eastbound & Down
Oh, Kenny.
"Oh, Kenny."
Eastbound & Down
We're family. I will not judge you.
"We're family. I will not judge you."
Eastbound & Down
...who I really trusted and they could give me...
"...who I really trusted and they could give me..."
Eastbound & Down
Yeah, maybe just tell me if I'm messing up by turning my back on baseball.
"Yeah, maybe just tell me if I'm messing up by turning my back on baseball."
Eastbound & Down
Oh, hell no. Kenny, you can't be running around...
"Oh, hell no. Kenny, you can't be running around..."
Eastbound & Down
- You'll never get across the river. - So you're saying I did the right thing...
"- You'll never get across the river. - So you're saying I did the right thing..."
Eastbound & Down
You gotta trust in your feelings.
"You gotta trust in your feelings."
Eastbound & Down
This makes so much sense.
"This makes so much sense."
Eastbound & Down
- Fuck it. Ha, ha. - Fuck it.
"- Fuck it. Ha, ha. - Fuck it."
Eastbound & Down
This is my workspace and I don't want you spraying all over...
"This is my workspace and I don't want you spraying all over..."
Eastbound & Down
Hey, thanks for showing us a good time today...
"Hey, thanks for showing us a good time today..."
Eastbound & Down
...and I appreciate all that advice. I look forward to more tomorrow.
"...and I appreciate all that advice. I look forward to more tomorrow."
Eastbound & Down
All right. Good night, son.
"All right. Good night, son."
Eastbound & Down
- Good night, Pop. - Good night, Mr. Powers.
"- Good night, Pop. - Good night, Mr. Powers."
Eastbound & Down
...and a warm comfortable bed, and you insult the life...
"...and a warm comfortable bed, and you insult the life..."
Eastbound & Down
That's not what I'm saying.
"That's not what I'm saying."
Eastbound & Down
Kenny, your dad is cool and all, but you're not like him.
"Kenny, your dad is cool and all, but you're not like him."
Eastbound & Down
I got a full day of outdoing Casper and bonding with my father.
"I got a full day of outdoing Casper and bonding with my father."
Eastbound & Down
Kenny, I have something to tell you and I am scared to tell you this, but...
"Kenny, I have something to tell you and I am scared to tell you this, but..."
Eastbound & Down
- I deserved it. - Yes, you did, Stevie.
"- I deserved it. - Yes, you did, Stevie."
Eastbound & Down
And now I realize that what I did was not right.
"And now I realize that what I did was not right."
Eastbound & Down
I've found my place, Stevie.
"I've found my place, Stevie."
Eastbound & Down
I intend to enjoy myself.
"I intend to enjoy myself."
Eastbound & Down
Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
"Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!"
Eastbound & Down
- Ha-ha-ha. - Yup, this is the spot.
"- Ha-ha-ha. - Yup, this is the spot."
Eastbound & Down
You gents ever hit this shit?
"You gents ever hit this shit?"
Eastbound & Down
Does the pope blow little kids? Ha-ha-ha.
"Does the pope blow little kids? Ha-ha-ha."
Eastbound & Down
Man, oh, man.
"Man, oh, man."
Eastbound & Down
Just smoking herb and riding around on recreational vehicles.
"Just smoking herb and riding around on recreational vehicles."
Eastbound & Down
I kind of feel like this is how I was always meant to live.
"I kind of feel like this is how I was always meant to live."
Eastbound & Down
I've been doing a lot of soul-searching lately...
"I've been doing a lot of soul-searching lately..."
Eastbound & Down
Because I love you, Dad.
"Because I love you, Dad."
Eastbound & Down
Nope it's not. Not for you to do it, it's not. Give that to me. Thank you.
"Nope it's not. Not for you to do it, it's not. Give that to me. Thank you."
Eastbound & Down
- Oh, you're getting a little fucking paranoid? - Yeah.
"- Oh, you're getting a little fucking paranoid? - Yeah."
Eastbound & Down
Scared thinking the fucking cops are coming. Ha-ha-ha!
"Scared thinking the fucking cops are coming. Ha-ha-ha!"
Eastbound & Down
I'm the one that made the call. Code name Emerald.
"I'm the one that made the call. Code name Emerald."
Eastbound & Down
Emerald.
"Emerald."
Eastbound & Down
- Oh, shit! - Where do I go to pick up the bounty?
"- Oh, shit! - Where do I go to pick up the bounty?"
Eastbound & Down
- There is no bounty. - Oh, now that's bullshit.
"- There is no bounty. - Oh, now that's bullshit."
Eastbound & Down
Unbelievable!
"Unbelievable!"
Eastbound & Down
...you can and I will not judge you.
"...you can and I will not judge you."
Eastbound & Down
I'm more just fucking mad. I should have saw this coming.
"I'm more just fucking mad. I should have saw this coming."
Eastbound & Down
Powers.
"Powers."
Eastbound & Down
- I do paperwork. - Oh, you do?
"- I do paperwork. - Oh, you do?"
Eastbound & Down
Hello, Kenny.
"Hello, Kenny."
Eastbound & Down
Soledad.
"Soledad."
Eastbound & Down
- You paid to have me freed? - Mm-hm.
"- You paid to have me freed? - Mm-hm."
Eastbound & Down
Uh, could you pay to have me freed too?
"Uh, could you pay to have me freed too?"
Eastbound & Down
Why the fuck are you always trying to horn in on my moments?
"Why the fuck are you always trying to horn in on my moments?"
Eastbound & Down
He's married to you and owns a successful ATV tour company.
"He's married to you and owns a successful ATV tour company."
Eastbound & Down
- Yes, he is. - Goddamn it.
"- Yes, he is. - Goddamn it."
Eastbound & Down
Well, where is he?
"Well, where is he?"
Eastbound & Down
He's in the car.
"He's in the car."
Eastbound & Down
Just so you know...
"Just so you know..."
Eastbound & Down
...I'm planning on leaving him.
"...I'm planning on leaving him."
Eastbound & Down
Why are you shitting in the prison, Stevie?
"Why are you shitting in the prison, Stevie?"
Eastbound & Down
Stop looking at me shit! Stop it!
"Stop looking at me shit! Stop it!"
Eastbound & Down
...this shit wouldn't be happening.
"...this shit wouldn't be happening."
Eastbound & Down
Heh. Why? Because you wear the pants in the family and own the ATV company?
"Heh. Why? Because you wear the pants in the family and own the ATV company?"
Eastbound & Down
Oh, fuck off!
"Oh, fuck off!"
Eastbound & Down