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Clips from Friends - The One with the Thumb (S01E01)

"He walked me home and said, "Let's do this again.""
Friends
"Like, "It's not you" means, "It is you.""
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""You're nice" means, "I'll be dating alcoholics.."
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"and complaining about them to you.""
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"Cushions the blow."
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"Warden, in five minutes my pain will be over."
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"But you'll live with the knowledge that you sent an honest man to die."
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"That was really good!"
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"Thanks. Let's keep going."
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"When you hold it, you feel right."
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"- You miss it? - No, not so much."
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"Oh, my God!"
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"- Give me that! - No. You've got options."
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"Okay, how's this?"
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"Coffee, black."
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"- You okay, Phoebe? - It's not worth"
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"- What did they do? - It's nothing"
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"Satan's minions at work again!"
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"Even if I was happy and skipping, I'd hear:"
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""Not-not mine. Not-not mine.""
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"I'd never be able to enjoy it. It'd be this giant karmic debt."
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"And this is my reward."
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"Forget about you. Think about what we went through!"
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"So this time I won't quit."
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"Oh, no!"
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"It's going pretty good. It's nice and we're having fun."
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"Sorry."
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"I bring a guy home and they're like.."
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"Okay, I'm done."
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"- I didn't know. - Yeah."
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"Please be good."
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"Let's let the Alan-bashing begin."
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"Know what was great? His smile was crooked."
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"From the rhyme."
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"is the yardstick by which future boyfriends will be measured."
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"- Know what I like most? - What?"
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"Fantastic! Question. How is that possible?"
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"It was like he made us into a team."
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"- Hey, Lizzy. - Hey, weird girl."
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"I left in the Y's. Because, "sometimes Y.""
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"I'll tell you what. Buy me a soda and we're even. Okay?"
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"- Okay. - Okay."
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"A thumb?"
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"- Does anyone wanna see? - No, thanks!"
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"So I have a flaw! Big deal!"
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"I accept those flaws. Why can't you accept me for this?"
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"There's nothing wrong with speaking correctly."
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"I'm going out with a guy my friends really like."
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"Are we talking about the coyotes here?"
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"I just don't feel the "thing.""
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"They feel the thing. I don't feel it."
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"Alan wants to speak to you."
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"Really? He does?"
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"Well, yeah. I have one now and then. Well, yeah, now."
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"Well, okay. Thanks."
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"If I had a sock on my hand for 30 years, it'd be talking too."
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"so I killed him."
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"- I think he's across the hall. - Thanks."
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"The soda people gave me $7000 for the thumb."
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"What is up with the universe?"
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"- What's going on? - It's just nice when we're together."
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"No, I'm not."
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"Is there somebody else?"
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"So that's it? It's over?"
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"Just like that?"
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"You let your guard down. You start to care about someone, and.."
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"Yeah, right!"
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"We're just gonna need a little time."
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"I just can't stand your friends."
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"That was fun."
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"So how'd it go?"
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"You know."
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"Did he mention us?"
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"He says he's really gonna miss you guys."
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"- Hi, guys. - Hey, Phoebe."
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"- How did it go? - Not so good."
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"Translated, "Let's do this again" means, "You'll never see me naked.""
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""We should see other people" means:"
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""Ha-ha, I already am!""
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"Like your parents putting the dog to sleep.."
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"and saying it went to a farm."
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"That's funny. Because our parents actually did.."
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"send our dog off to live on a farm."
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"Ross?"
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"Hello! The Milner's farm in Connecticut?"
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"The Milners had this unbelievable farm."
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"And it was.."
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"So, what do you want from me, Dimon? Huh?"
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"I just wanna go back to my cell, because in my cell I can smoke."
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"Smoke away!"
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"I think this is why Dimon smokes in his cell alone."
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"- What? - Relax your hand."
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"Let your wrist go."
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"Not so much!"
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"All right. Now take a puff."
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"Right."
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"It's fine. Do you want to get this part or not? Here."
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"Now, don't think of it as a cigarette."
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"You feel complete."
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"All right. Now we smoke."
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"- Chandler - Or hold it in your mouth."
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"Give me the cigarette!"
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"- You try. - Thank you."
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"Okay, that's not bad."
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"All right, you keep practicing.."
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"No. It's the distance from the tip of a guy's thumb.."
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"to the tip of his index finger."
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"That's ridiculous."
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"Can I use either thumb?"
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"All right. Don't tell me."
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"Decaf cappuccino for Joey."
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"Latte."
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"- I'm getting good at this. - Excellent!"
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"Good for me!"
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"It's my bank."
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"I get my mail and open their monthly "statement.""
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"Easy!"
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"And there's $500 extra in my account."
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"Now I have to go deal with them"
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"- What are you talking about? Keep it! - It's not mine."
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