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Clips from American Dad! - Stan's Night Out (S04E04)

"## [Humming]"
American Dad!
"[Shrieks] I'm gonna do man stuff tonight!"
American Dad!
"Who could sing this?"
American Dad!
"This thong gives me an ass rash, but the boys love it."
American Dad!
"Give it up, Roger. You're not more attractive than me."
American Dad!
"No one smiled at either of us at the mall today."
American Dad!
"You guys were at the mall? Maybe this is about you."
American Dad!
""You- cute brunette with friend at mall next to hat kiosk."
American Dad!
"Me- too shy to say hello." [Gasps]"
American Dad!
"I was the cute brunette at the mall! He's talking about me!"
American Dad!
"How do you know that I'm not cute and you're friend?"
American Dad!
"He says to meet him tonight at the food court."
American Dad!
"He'll be wearing a green sweater."
American Dad!
"Oh, you should both go."
American Dad!
"Roger, did you draw that on?"
American Dad!
"Yes. Aroused?"
American Dad!
"- Uh- - Well, it's not for you!"
American Dad!
"- No way! - Look who escaped."
American Dad!
"My friends, I would like to make a toast."
American Dad!
"To Stan getting away from his wife for the night..."
American Dad!
"and me getting away from mine... forever!"
American Dad!
"Yep, my divorce from Sheila became final today."
American Dad!
"Ungrateful mutt. And I'm talking about Sheila."
American Dad!
"- [All Laughing] - I thought it was the dog you were talking about."
American Dad!
"It was a joke, and I got it. I'm one of the guys."
American Dad!
"## [Humming]"
American Dad!
"Nathan! Stop it!"
American Dad!
"This is why you keep getting molested."
American Dad!
"It's credit card roulette. Whoever loses pays the bill."
American Dad!
"- Dick Reynolds? - Oh!"
American Dad!
"- [Both Laughing] - [Laughs] Yeah!"
American Dad!
"Oh, my God! When she pulled out that card, it looked exactly like my card."
American Dad!
"It was Dick's card. Now Dick has to pay."
American Dad!
"Two places in one night? You guys are wild!"
American Dad!
"[Father] Nathan!"
American Dad!
"- Stogies! - I am so glad I came out tonight."
American Dad!
"Better than sitting at home with the wife, bored out of my-"
American Dad!
"- [Hissing] - Ah! I have a guy who can fix this right up."
American Dad!
"- I'll pay for the whole thing. - Ah, that's great..."
American Dad!
"but I still have to report it to my insurance."
American Dad!
"Oh, sure. I understand."
American Dad!
"I've got three D.U.I. S, Stan. One more, and they take away my license."
American Dad!
"[Groans] Oh! Ow!"
American Dad!
"You guys, we have to take this man to the hospital."
American Dad!
"And lose our buzz? Come on! The night's just begun!"
American Dad!
"Yeah. We're just getting started."
American Dad!
"Oh, please. I think I have a concussion."
American Dad!
"What if I fall asleep? I could die in here."
American Dad!
"Ah! Nothing more relaxing than a nice cigar."
American Dad!
"Look, guys, we have to get that man to a hospital."
American Dad!
"Relax, Stan! This kind of thing happens all the time."
American Dad!
"Yeah, last week we snuck into the zoo, and Sanders fought a panda."
American Dad!
"That's where I got this."
American Dad!
"You know, I heard they shot Cilantro's "El Perro" video in the bathroom."
American Dad!
"Uh, gonna go check it out."
American Dad!
"## [Whistling]"
American Dad!
"- [Clicks, Imitates Gunshot] - [Laughter]"
American Dad!
"Hang tough in there, buddy. I'm gonna get you to a hospital. I promise."
American Dad!
"- You know why I pulled you over. - Did I forget to signal?"
American Dad!
"You're missing the front portion of your vehicle, sir."
American Dad!
"Um, I have a ventriloquist act."
American Dad!
"It's hard to book gigs. Most stages can't accommodate a car..."
American Dad!
"Sir, get out of the car and open the trunk."
American Dad!
"- [Screams] - Dick, that's an officer of the law!"
American Dad!
"Don't you know how to knock a guy out?"
American Dad!
"- Yeah, you knock out guys like a girl. - Oh, yeah?"
American Dad!
"- Do I mess up hair like a girl? Do I mess up hair like a girl? - Hey, come on!"
American Dad!
"Dick, don't! Dick. Come on, Dick."
American Dad!
"Why are you doing this, Dick? This isn't you."
American Dad!
"Guys, knock it off!"
American Dad!
"So, do you like 30 Rock?"
American Dad!
"[Officer] Shut up!"
American Dad!
"Yeah, I'm a fan."
American Dad!
"[Grunts] Damn it. Damn thong."
American Dad!
"[Sniffs] I really should not be shaking anyone's hand."
American Dad!
"Oh, he's a looker! Don't stare at him. Sit. Sit."
American Dad!
"and we'll see how purple your majesty gets."
American Dad!
"[Slurping]"
American Dad!
"We really saved you back there, Stan."
American Dad!
"- [Pounding Continues] - Let's just get them to the hospital..."
American Dad!
"I miss my dog! Biscuit! I miss Biscuit!"
American Dad!
"She took him."
American Dad!
"[Whispering] Okay. You take the front. I'll take the back."
American Dad!
"- [Barking] - [Screams]"
American Dad!
"- Cheese and crackers! Fuck, that hurt! - [Light Switch Clicks]"
American Dad!
"Dick? You get out of here right now, or I'm calling the police!"
American Dad!
"[Man] Sheila? Who are you talking to?"
American Dad!
"Al?"
American Dad!
"That's right. I'm nailing your barber."
American Dad!
"Now that's how you knock a guy out."
American Dad!
"Bring him back, you monsters!"
American Dad!
"Oh! He's naked. Can't you put him in the other way?"
American Dad!
"[Sheila] Where are you going, you mug?"
American Dad!
"I'm the one who clogged the toilet on your houseboat."
American Dad!
"Roger, don't you look beautiful."
American Dad!
"Tyler invited me to a party tonight. Semiformal."
American Dad!
"I envy you, Hayley. Never having to worry..."
American Dad!
"about things like panty hose or contraception."
American Dad!
"[Grunts] No babies for me."
American Dad!
"[Man On Stereo] #He was living in a dream #"
American Dad!
"# Wondering and wondering #"
American Dad!
"This house is beautiful."
American Dad!
"I'm, uh, gonna go to the bar. Would you like something?"
American Dad!
"I'll have an orgasm. And for my drink, I'd like a banana daiquiri."
American Dad!
"You are in for a treat."
American Dad!
"- Hi, I'm Amber. - Hi, I'm Stephanie."
American Dad!
"He saw me at the mall and asked me out. That's how attractive I am."
American Dad!
"Huh. I just met my date today too."
American Dad!
"Bam. Bam. Bam."
American Dad!
"Oh, my God. I'm a pig."
American Dad!
"[Sobbing] Thank you."
American Dad!
"Stan, this is boring. Going to the hospital is boring."
American Dad!
"- We're almost there. It's just another block. - Hookers!"
American Dad!
"What are you fine-ass ladies doing out here all alone?"
American Dad!
"- Selling our bodies. - Sold! Get in!"
American Dad!
"No! Don't get in! Now, we're going to the hospital, and that's-"
American Dad!
"- # Yeah # - # Whoo #"
American Dad!
"- # Yeah # - # Whoo #"
American Dad!
"And I'm not even at my desk. I'm at Duper's desk."
American Dad!
"Listen. Thanks for all the sex, but we're in a recession..."
American Dad!
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