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Clips from Parks and Recreation (2009) - Partridge (S05E05)

"My own taste buds."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I wanna have a baby, and Chris has agreed to be the father."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"If this were the '80s, all we'd have to do is, like,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Okay, our official co-parenting score is..."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"58% compatibility."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I think it's literally the best score we could have hoped for."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- Not sure that that's true. - Oh, snap!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I just filled it out for fun."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You wanna make a baby, traeger?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Your hair, my everything else."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"That kid would be unstoppable."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Guys, I couldn't resist. I did it too."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Ann and I got 84%."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- Well, this sucks. - Yes, we did not win."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"So was, like, Ben a bossy older brother?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Did he make you watch star war movies?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I loved those movies just as much as he did."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Yeah, get used to it. We're sisters now."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Benji, I'm really glad you came back for this."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"A lot of jerks around here didn't think you'd show up."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Well, I wasn't sure, but Leslie gave me the extra push,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Now that you're both here, let's get started."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Just have a few questions."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- You have a binder? - That's right."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Who were Ben's high school girlfriends,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and what base do you think he got to?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- Um... - What's that?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"And what exactly did you witness?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Defendant, alias Ron Swanson,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"used appropriate force to prevent further damage"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"to the wedding of Leslie Knope,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You sound as if you have a special interest in law enforcement."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"but was deemed unfit for the force."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"And what happened?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Well, I pooched the brain exam."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Just to be safe, I wouldn't take anything I say too seriously."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Next witness, your honor."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Ms. Ludgate, have you ever heard Mr. Swanson"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"threaten to hurt councilman Jamm?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I've never heard him threaten to hurt anyone or anything."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"The guy's, like, a vegetarian."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Look at him, he's like a big, old, soft teddy bear."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"His nickname around the office"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"say he intended to injure councilman Jamm"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"The answer is a flat "no.""
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Ron doesn't really pay much attention to other people."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I doubt he even knew you existed."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Also, may I say for the record, that is a dope pocket square."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"There's only one thing I hate more than lying."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Which is water that's lying about being milk."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Despite everything that happened 20 years ago,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"this will always be my hometown."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Are you crying again?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"It's just every time you say that speech,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I think about where you've been and where you're going"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and our future children and America"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Wow, I didn't think about all that,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Ah, I'm feeling sweaty. Do I look swe--"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I feel--oh, I need to use the bathroom one more time."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"That's, like, five times in an hour."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Well, somebody's nervous about the ceremony."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I don't blame him."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Ben?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Are you okay?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Is that possible? No, right?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- No, no, no, no. - Oh, God!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I'll call an ambulance."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Oh, God! It's twins!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- I'm having twins! - Oh! Okay."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- Kidney stone? - Big sucker too."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"We're gonna have to keep him here until it passes."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Leslie and Dr. Clipperton..."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Wow, man, I'm so glad you guys are meeting."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"It's like worlds collide. You know, I love it."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"What is he on?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I'm serious. You're like a flower."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Or, no, like a snug-bug or like a snugger-doodle"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Life."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"We have a ceremony we need to be at in two hours."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Is there anything that we can do?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Sorry, Ice Town, you're not going anywhere for at least a day."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Okay, well, I'll call mayor Stice,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and we'll reschedule the ceremony."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I'm making that speech,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and they have to surrender to the flow of the universe, you know?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Price Is Right is on, I think."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Oh, you remember staying home sick from school..."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"watching the price is right?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Look, I know that this is just a silly quiz,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"but it is so discouraging to do so poorly."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I know it's a little lame,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"but I bought a dozen eggs at the grocery store,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and I thought we could do that thing where we pretend the egg is a kid for a day."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"That's a great idea!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I don't see them."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Oh, my God."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- I left them at the grocery store. - Oh, boy."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I bought 12 babies,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I mean, we could use this mug."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I don't understand. I was great."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I was like Mark Z in The Social "N.""
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"But it wasn't the truth."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I gave his wife new enamels,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"he gave my wife new yabbos."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Who's that gentleman?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Jeremy Jamm, city councilman."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- You don't know him? - Never met him."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"He looks like he could use a swift punch in the face though."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"And then before he can say anything, I just run over, shove him into the pool."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"What's up, Ron?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Just daydreaming about punching Jamm in the face."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"And there were a few other times too."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- We get the picture, son. - Hold on."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Keep going, Tom."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"the city has finally healed"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"from the festering wound of Ice Town."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Today we put those horribly painful memories behind us"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"as we welcome back the mayor who made all of that possible,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Oh, that's a typo. That's a major typo."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"That says "Ice Clown.""
Parks and Recreation (2009)
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