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Clips from The Odd Couple - The Unger Games (S01E01)

"Hey, it wasn't during sex."
The Odd Couple
"It was after, when her boyfriend came home"
The Odd Couple
"and I had to jump out the window."
The Odd Couple
"This is great. Out of all the people"
The Odd Couple
"to get injured, it had to be the former pro ballplayer."
The Odd Couple
"Oh, you guys are gonna be fine without me."
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"Yeah, I know."
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"All season."
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"Roy...?"
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"Are you a lavender guy or more of a wild rose?"
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"I don't care."
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"because some people are uncomfortable"
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"Hi, I'm Some People."
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"What are we gonna do without Murph?"
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"Yeah, it's bad enough the league requires us"
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"I know you're not talking about me"
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"and my .375 average, Mr. Too Slow to Steal a Base."
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"I had a belly full of soup."
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"or we're not gonna have enough players."
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"I could do it."
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"Roy, didn't your wife play in college?"
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"I only do this to avoid my wife."
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"Guys, give me a chance!"
The Odd Couple
"Felix, have you ever played softball?"
The Odd Couple
"always conflicted with the fall musical."
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"Which one year was Damn Yankees, so..."
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"♪ Whaddya say, boys? ♪"
The Odd Couple
"The boys say no."
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"♪ Ah, put me in, Coach ♪"
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"♪ I won't let ya down! ♪"
The Odd Couple
"Felix, do you even have a mitt?"
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"Oh, great. I'll get my sneakers."
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"We'll put him in right field."
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"Oh, wonderful."
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"The position by the long cabana."
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"Thanks for letting me play, fellas."
The Odd Couple
"Actually, we should be thanking you."
The Odd Couple
"You're the one that drove Amy in for the winning run."
The Odd Couple
"Technically, he bunted her in."
The Odd Couple
"Yeah, because technically,"
The Odd Couple
"Then you got mad, kicked the ground,"
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"Maybe that's because there was soup on home plate."
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"Well, luckily Felix bailed you out."
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"You got some quick hands."
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"There's a reason"
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"No offense, Murph."
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"Oh, none understood."
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"That you were shown up by a guy"
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"Come on, take it easy on Oscar."
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"- Thanks for letting me play this season. - Bye, girl."
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"Hey, uh, Amy, the league has a strict rule"
The Odd Couple
"that at the end of the season, the captain has to take"
The Odd Couple
"one of the players out to a romantic dinner."
The Odd Couple
"Wow. What a specific and weird rule."
The Odd Couple
"Oh, I did. They're part of my collection."
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"Are they for sale?"
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"'Cause I'd love to buy a couple pairs for my mom and sister."
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"Yes, they're for sale. They're so for sale."
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"Uh, two pairs, that'll be... $200."
The Odd Couple
"That's it?"
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"I would've thought they'd be at least a thousand."
The Odd Couple
"Really?"
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"Oh, well."
The Odd Couple
"Well, there are other sports. You like basketball, don't you?"
The Odd Couple
"Hey, did you know that there is a basketball court at my gym."
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"I know because I dart through there"
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"on the way to my abs and buns class."
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"You got lucky today, Felix."
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"Just enjoy the win, quietly."
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"Oh, yeah, Oscar."
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"Afraid that I'm gonna bring the pain?"
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"That's what Estoban says in my buns class."
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"- All right! - Game's on!"
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"Okay, we'll play "make it, take it" rules."
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"Means if I make a basket, I keep the ball"
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"God, that was exhilarating."
The Odd Couple
"Yeah. Exhilarating."
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"Who won?"
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"Wow! Congratulations, Felix."
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"Oh, not just to me... you would have been proud of our boy."
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"I feel like you're patronizing me."
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"It's bad enough to lose, but to lose to somebody like you..."
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"I'm sorry, did you say "someone like you"?"
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"Uh, I think I left my, uh, thing in a place."
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"- Do you mean a freelance photographer? - No."
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"Do you mean a Virgo with a Pisces rising?"
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"- Your words, not mine. - Ah!"
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"Oh, come on, Felix, admit it,"
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"Why? Because I use coasters?"
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"Because I sing the occasional aria in the shower?"
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"I feel like you're trying my case for me."
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"I thought today was about bonding and fellowship,"
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"And you would know what that means if you ever"
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"I don't need to watch the show"
The Odd Couple
"to know that it's bad to poke a dragon."
The Odd Couple
"Well, I have already bested you at two sports,"
The Odd Couple
"but if you'd like another drubbing... yes, that's a word..."
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"like crochet."
The Odd Couple
"You mean croquet."
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"Well, guess who is not getting mittens this Christmas."
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"Perhaps your disdain will keep you warm."
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"Pick a real sport, and I'll beat you at it."
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"Okay, I say we settle this like the ancient Greeks."
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"I don't like where this is going."
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"It's settled then."
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"Decathlon at dawn!"
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"Dawn?"
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"No, you're right."
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"Decathlon at a reasonable hour!"
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"Hey! I sold a bracelet on a Web site."
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"I sent it off, and she promised me"
The Odd Couple
"that the check is in the mail."
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"I'm bad at this, aren't I?"
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"Why are you stretching?"
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"Oh, Oscar and I are competing in a decathlon,"
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"and I don't want to pull anything when I kick his ass."
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"That doesn't sound like you."
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"Yes, I apologize for the salty language,"
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"but he really pushed my buttons."
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"That's crazy."
The Odd Couple
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