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Clips from Transparent - Pilot (S01E01)

"What?"
Transparent
"Just doing a little riverdance on your boobs."
Transparent
"Let's go, let's go."
Transparent
"- Okay. - A really big juicy one."
Transparent
"Oh, yeah, that motherfucking bird?"
Transparent
"The one that's like, "Oh, the tractor."
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"- you know, those little... - Yeah, yeah, best seller."
Transparent
"- Soul mate? - Oh, jeez."
Transparent
"You know, just... being me."
Transparent
"Yeah, top seller."
Transparent
"- Get your foot off my backpack. - Ella, get in your seat."
Transparent
"His foot is on my lunchbox."
Transparent
"Hey, dad, what's up? I got the kids in the car."
Transparent
"Girls in the band getting crafty."
Transparent
"Can you, uh, lift it up a little bit?"
Transparent
"No, sativa gives me anxiety attacks."
Transparent
"or she'll smoke it all."
Transparent
"Hi, I'm Ali."
Transparent
"Hi."
Transparent
"Um, she's 17 now."
Transparent
"a second go around."
Transparent
"Yeah. We have a... we got a five-year-old, Gracie,"
Transparent
"What you got?"
Transparent
"- His name's Len. - Yeah, yeah."
Transparent
"Hey, I saw the profile on you"
Transparent
"about your interior, um, decorator..."
Transparent
"- I can... - Right, with the kids."
Transparent
"- at the same time. - No, I'm actually not,"
Transparent
"The other one is an actual delightful human person,"
Transparent
"very seriously playing the triangle?"
Transparent
"- Yeah, that's true... - Ah, yes."
Transparent
"Oh, my God. What do you have against the triangle?"
Transparent
"How do you feed these children you have over at your house?"
Transparent
"- Yes. - And?"
Transparent
"- You think he has cancer? - Kinda."
Transparent
"Well, if he's really sick, he should start gifting us"
Transparent
"Oh, my God, I just got a boner in my tummy."
Transparent
"I thought maybe we were here to"
Transparent
"hear about his engagement to Marcy."
Transparent
"- Ew. - Really, he's a Marcy hound."
Transparent
"Haven't, like, the last six been named Marcy?"
Transparent
"Rubenstein, or... what was that one?"
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"Does Shotgun Willy's do the coleslaw"
Transparent
"- Hey, gorgeous. - Hi."
Transparent
"You're skinny."
Transparent
"God, does Len know the kids are at same school?"
Transparent
"Why would Len care?"
Transparent
"lezzing it up together?"
Transparent
"Please, who doesn't experiment in college?"
Transparent
"Are you kidding? That's not experimenting."
Transparent
"Oh, my God, I distinctly remember you calling"
Transparent
"and saying you were gonna have two Mexican boys..."
Transparent
""Always knew how much to order.""
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"Is, um, is Marcy coming?"
Transparent
"Oh, my God, look at that face."
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"- Mm. Oh, God. - Look at that."
Transparent
"I loved him so much."
Transparent
"♪ would you help me place this call? ♪"
Transparent
"- Wonderful job. - Okay."
Transparent
"Are you kidding?"
Transparent
"You're having problems with gluten?"
Transparent
"We'll hose him down at the end."
Transparent
"- your mustache. - Okay."
Transparent
"Oh, you know what? It's really not that hard..."
Transparent
"Dad, you look good. He looks good."
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"They didn't... they couldn't see it."
Transparent
"- You never know. - Nothing to be joked about."
Transparent
"- That's beside the point. - How many of your friend..."
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"You're not gonna move to the West Side."
Transparent
"No, not to live in. I'm gonna flip it."
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"I've been zillowing the fuck out of this place."
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"I'm sorry."
Transparent
"- in this house. - Oh, my God."
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"No fucking way. Jesus Christ."
Transparent
"Now, she needs two sugar daddies?"
Transparent
""As proven by the fact"... that's a verb."
Transparent
"Good-bye."
Transparent
"All right, you want to take this home?"
Transparent
"It's just a loan."
Transparent
"What happened to the, uh, Price is Right money?"
Transparent
"I'm not in trouble. I'm just..."
Transparent
"I'm not depressed."
Transparent
"- Hello? - Hi."
Transparent
"I know."
Transparent
"Make yourself comfortable."
Transparent
"announce his retirement."
Transparent
"- So that was it. - Yeah."
Transparent
"Hey, I was thinking about, um..."
Transparent
"I says, "I didn't join this board to watch you turn it"
Transparent
"If you're gonna sit there, take your shoes off."
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"You're not gonna get any of it?"
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"Dating younger women doesn't come cheap."
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"Well, he says he's single now."
Transparent
"Hi, Ed."
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"Hi."
Transparent
"How you doing?"
Transparent
"I don't get why you'd ask me to sleep over"
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"No, the family house."
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"Well, I went to target,"
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""Oh.""
Transparent
"Oh, that was a..."
Transparent
"I mean, that was a big victory."
Transparent
"Thank you for your share, Maura."
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"But I will, and it will be soon..."
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"I promise you."
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"Your eye."
Transparent
"Isn't that your whole, like,"
Transparent
"thang, your skill set?"
Transparent
"Now."
Transparent
"Uh, I just want to change my body, you know?"
Transparent
"nice sculpted arms, and then,"
Transparent
"Not like I'm just gonna sort of fall over."
Transparent
"Uh, food mostly, but then sometimes I eat too much"
Transparent
"No, I like to think of it more as discipline."
Transparent
"We just have to go around the back to get in."
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"The bones on this baby."
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"You think it's..."
Transparent
"unless... unless somebody needs the money."
Transparent
"How's old Mort sitting for dough?"
Transparent
"Calls it the ghetto."
Transparent
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