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Clips from How I Met Your Mother - Who Wants to Be a Godparent (S08E08)

"There was a double “homi” on your block a week ago."
How I Met Your Mother
"Caught it on the scanner during lunch."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh! [Crying]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Anyway, then we got to the section..."
How I Met Your Mother
"“Sometimes couples choose one of their parents as a guardian.”"
How I Met Your Mother
"That makes it simple. My mom."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Your mom? - What's Wrong with my mom?"
How I Met Your Mother
"- Are you- - [Voices Speed Up]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Fine! All right!"
How I Met Your Mother
"Marvin won't go to my loving mother."
How I Met Your Mother
"- But he's gotta go to somebody. - Fine."
How I Met Your Mother
"- What about my mom? - [ Scoffs ] Your mom?"
How I Met Your Mother
"- Um, excuse- - [Voices Speeding Up]"
How I Met Your Mother
"- What about my dad? - Your dad?"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Voice Speeds Up] Okay, yeah. He's out."
How I Met Your Mother
"Wait a minute. You know who would be good?"
How I Met Your Mother
"My brother, Marcus. Hes, like, a great dad."
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ [ Male Chorus Vocalizing ]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Questionable denim choices aside..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Marcus is a good dad."
How I Met Your Mother
"I guess if Marvin has to go to anyone, it should be family."
How I Met Your Mother
"Okay, great."
How I Met Your Mother
"Okay."
How I Met Your Mother
"Marcus. Hey, how's it going?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Pretty freaking sweet, butt wipe."
How I Met Your Mother
"I packed up all my crap."
How I Met Your Mother
"I said, “See ya” to Sarah and the kids..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and I finally got my dream job as a mixologist down here at Carnalism 2."
How I Met Your Mother
"Hold on."
How I Met Your Mother
"Hey! [Jamaican Accent] You be packing that bowl too tight, mon!"
How I Met Your Mother
"So now we don't have a guardian."
How I Met Your Mother
"You know, as your best friend..."
How I Met Your Mother
"If you Want him to be raised by his underwear on a flagpole, Ted's your guy."
How I Met Your Mother
"If you Want him pulling the cord on some other nerds panties, I'm your guy."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'll teach that kid how to be awesome in ways you and Lily never could."
How I Met Your Mother
"No, I won't Wait for it. And neither should little baby Marvin..."
How I Met Your Mother
"[ Ted Narrating ] And so began the longest week of Lily and Marshall's lives."
How I Met Your Mother
"Huh?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Huh?"
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ Bro MacDonald had a farm E-I-E-I-bro ♪"
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ E-I-E-I-bro ♪"
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ With a hot chick here and dumb chick there-♪ ♪"
How I Met Your Mother
"Huh? Huh?"
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ ♪ [ Note ]"
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ Bro, bro, bro your broat gently to the bar ♪"
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ Hit on sluts then do 10 shots and-♪ ♪"
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ ♪ [ Note ]"
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ The boobs on the bus go up and down ♪"
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ Up and down, up and down ♪"
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ All through the town ♪♪"
How I Met Your Mother
"They've already got one, fool."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, this is no stroller, Robin."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Sighs]"
How I Met Your Mother
"I don't get it. I don't see anything."
How I Met Your Mother
"Are those Robin's boobies?"
How I Met Your Mother
"When nubile hotties lean in to inspect your bundle of joy..."
How I Met Your Mother
"you can inspect their bundles of joy."
How I Met Your Mother
"The broiler. God! I come up with a lot of good stuff!"
How I Met Your Mother
"- Hey, guys. - Hey."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Hey. - Lily and I need you to come upstairs."
How I Met Your Mother
"This is an important decision, and we cant have you constantly interrupting us..."
How I Met Your Mother
"with this childish competition."
How I Met Your Mother
"Which is why we're gonna make it an official competition!"
How I Met Your Mother
"We're gonna play Who Wants To Be a Godparent?..."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Whispering] Why is he talking to the Wall?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Wait. This is how you're gonna choose a guardian for Marvin?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Why don't you just put us in a three-way cage match..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and go with whoever's left standing?"
How I Met Your Mother
"We talked about that, but it gave Robin an unfair advantage."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Sighs]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Babe, I know these guys have been a little over the top lately."
How I Met Your Mother
"“A little”?"
How I Met Your Mother
"But we still have to pick a guardian, just in case."
How I Met Your Mother
"- In case of What? - Don't make me say it."
How I Met Your Mother
"Say it. I can handle it. Say it."
How I Met Your Mother
"- In case we die. - [ Crying 1"
How I Met Your Mother
"[ Marshal ] And then I thought, "What do you do if you've got a wife who won't stop crying..."
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"three idiots who won't stop bribing you..."
How I Met Your Mother
"buy your Wife an expensive dress so she'll participate."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'm pretty again."
How I Met Your Mother
"Bottom line is I just Wanted to make the idea of me and Lily dying-"
How I Met Your Mother
"- Oh. - fun."
How I Met Your Mother
"Now, if you'll step behind your podiums, we'll get started."
How I Met Your Mother
"When it lands on a parenting issue..."
How I Met Your Mother
"you'll each describe how you would handle it with Marvin."
How I Met Your Mother
"The contestant with the highest score gets to be his godparent."
How I Met Your Mother
"See, now, see, um, enthusiasm will factor into your scores."
How I Met Your Mother
"- So, I say again, Lily- - [ All ] Spin that Wheel!"
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"Ooh. Our demise."
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"- Oh! - [ Clears Throat ] Barney."
How I Met Your Mother
"How would you explain to little Marvin..."
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"why we're not around anymore?"
How I Met Your Mother
"No!"
How I Met Your Mother
"Easy. All I'd have to do is change a few words to one of my classics with the ladies."
How I Met Your Mother
"The president of the world has called your parents away..."
How I Met Your Mother
"on a super-secret space mission."
How I Met Your Mother
"For the sake of the planet, you will never see them again."
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"What do you know? The last line stays the same."
How I Met Your Mother
"Okay, Robin, What would you do?"
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"Remember, “president of the world called parents away for a super-secret space mission”..."
How I Met Your Mother
"has already been taken."
How I Met Your Mother
"Well, my dad was always up-front and honest with me..."
How I Met Your Mother
"so that's how I would be."
How I Met Your Mother
"All right, kid. Here's the deal with the deal."
How I Met Your Mother
"Belly flopped off a subway platform."
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"Mom busted open like a pinata."
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"What was left of your dad hung around for a few days."
How I Met Your Mother
"Anyway, plugs pulled, organs donated."
How I Met Your Mother
"Long story short, I'm your new mommy now. [ Chuckles ]"
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"So-wish!"
How I Met Your Mother
"[crying 1"
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"I- I was saving these for the showcase."
How I Met Your Mother
"Here, hang on."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Hey, Lily, look, baby. Look. His and her watches. - Oh!"
How I Met Your Mother
"[ Clears Throat ] Ted."
How I Met Your Mother
"Category's all yours."
How I Met Your Mother
"Okay, here's What I would say."
How I Met Your Mother
"Well, Marvin, explaining Where your parents are isn't gonna be easy."
How I Met Your Mother
"Even I, Lily and Marshal's best friend..."
How I Met Your Mother
"for almost 20 years..."
How I Met Your Mother
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