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Clips from Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000) - Foisted! (S09E09)

"- I'm older than you. - Hey, by the way, good news about "Fatwa!""
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"There's a lot of producers interested in it."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"'cause my bird died"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"The good news is I'm still alive.""
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You know, it's a dead parakeet. That's a funny thing."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"He knows me. He knew you. Remember he came over once?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"( imitates parakeet ) And you-- you thought that was "Seinfeld.""
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You know why I'm laughing? At the sadness of your entire existence."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Yes, everything's funny."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Did Jeff tell you about my new business?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Soaps On? - ...sustainable."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"It's a great name. You know, you don't know"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Did I just hear you say you needed to hire an assistant?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"And I'm not gonna be able to take my assistant."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"She's-- she's the best I ever had."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Yeah. - Oh, he's a big star."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- What? - I can't give her up."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You're gonna be on the phone with her here and you're in New York?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"That's ridiculous. That doesn't make any sense."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You need to hire a new assistant in New York"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"( women arguing )"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- No, I didn't do anything. - Of course he just shows up, too."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- You should be a bride. - I'm the groom."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"I don't wanna be the bride."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- You know-- - How is it appropriate for you to have an opinion about this?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"What kind of psychopath"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"interferes with the nuances of a lesbian wedding?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- I can't believe-- - That's what Ted Kennedy said"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"about Robert Kennedy at his funeral."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You know what's not Robert Kennedy-ish?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Stop saying "ajar"! - Okay."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"What is really going on here? Do you need a hobby?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"( scoffs ) Not a terrible idea."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You're-- you're right about that."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- It doesn't-- - I'm done."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"It doesn't matter about him. I just want you to be happy."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"I want us to have a successful wedding and a successful life."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"I held the door, she didn't like it."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Mm-hmm. - What's up with that?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Are you sure...?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"( sing-song ) I've got some news."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Okay, 'cause of the musical, I might be going to New York."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"She's starting this new company called Soaps On"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"This woman's a-- she's a fucking saint, okay?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"the hard work that you did, even though it wasn't very challenging at all."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"...you claim to have done something, but I'm sure you did."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Okay, take the plant. Yeah."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Nah. I don't think so."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"I'll tell you what. Let's do one of these."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"There we go."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- All right. - We'll see ya."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Bye, Leon. - Give my best to Susie."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- You did it! - Huh? How 'bout that?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"She ain't gonna limp her ass back up in here, right?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Nope. - She's out of here for good?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"What? What are you talkin' about?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"That's-- that's impossible."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Oh, I'm sorry, that bitch got foisted."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Hey! Hey! - Hey, how you doin'?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Good to see you. Hi. - How are you? Welcome."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Hey, Jeff. What's up?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Hey. Is that for me? - We at "Jimmy Kimmel.""
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"I'm gonna take it outside."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Crudi-take."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"All right?"
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"It's fine because-- no, we--"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"of foisting that you did."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- What do you mean? - Nice job."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"I did foist her on you."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Congratulations. - Thank you."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"It's like a pyramid scheme, almost."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Uh, yeah. In a way, yes."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Exactly! Exactly, yeah. - Yeah."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Yeah, thanks. I'll see you out there. - All right, see you out there."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Now, um, I understand you have a new project."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Of course the ayatollah is in it."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"How can you have a fatwa without an ayatollah?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You do need an ayatollah, right."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"What appeals to you about the ayatollah?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- The denunciation, okay. - All day long, he's denunciating."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- You can kill yourself. - It's not easy to be the ayatollah."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"It requires a lot of energy. Yeah, yeah."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"and they all seem to spell it the same way."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"And you never know-- if you look at the history of ayatollahs,"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"they-- it all seems like one person."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- It's the same thing. - What else about the ayatollah do you know?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
""I know how to go."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"and gives me a left turn in rush hour. No good.""
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- You know. - I feel like maybe I've been in an Uber with the ayatollah,"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- That's possible. Yeah. - Yeah."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Do you know about the ayatollah's life?"
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"He loves granola."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Larry David's office. What's up?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- I don't know. - What's taking so long? Get Larry!"
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"Hold on, Jeff. Hold on."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"issuing an actual fatwa and calling for the death of the comedian."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- ( both shouting ) - What the fuck is wrong with you?!"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"...Larry David!"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Even if Larry David repents, he will be condemned to death."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"I'll-- I'll convert! I'll become a Muslim!"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"I-- the ayatollah mentioned my name."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Fatwa by association."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Do I associate with you? - Yeah."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- You're fine as well. - I am?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"I go on the "Jimmy Kimmel" show and I apologize."
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"This is all dead."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- It's me. - Holy shit."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Have you ever seen "Undercover Boss"?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"The guy goes undercover, nobody even knows who he is."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"He's the boss of the whole company. He fools everybody."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- I know you're in here. I saw your car. - Holy shit."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Fatwa? - ( whispers ) No, lesbian bride."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"maybe stay the fuck out!"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"( theme music playing )"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"My nephew Kenny, the jewel of the Funkhouser family tree."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"LARRY DAVID: Is that so?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"High school all-American pitcher."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"DAVID: Kid's a pitcher?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Looks like he can't lift a chess piece."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Oh, I wouldn't want to get too close to that guy,"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
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