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Clips from Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000) - Foisted! (S09E09)

"♪ He has a merry tune to toot ♪"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"♪ The medicine-- the medicine go down ♪"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"♪ For a spoonful of... ♪"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"Woman: Hey! Hey!"
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"Oh, um..."
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"No-- no "after you"?"
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"I-- I-- I didn't really get an "after you" vibe."
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"Well-- well, why not? I'm a woman, aren't I?"
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"You have, uh, short hair,"
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"So, you looked at me and then let a door shut on me."
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"I thought you might not want that, that's all."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"It is ironic because I would've enjoyed the door being open for me."
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"also there was some distance involved, too."
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"Where did you get that equation from?"
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"is that that's a fucked up equation, you know what I mean?"
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"But you can't argue with the distance, though."
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"Salman Rushdie, I don't know,"
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"- It's like the odds are-- - The idea sucks, Lar."
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"Really? Oh, like you're a paragon of tastes."
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"Guess who's getting married."
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"- He was a Marine. - Don't you got to be careful"
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"He doesn't have PTSD."
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"( chuckles ) ...you know, like that."
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"- Ah, you poor fucker. - ( buzzer blares )"
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"- Betty! - Hi, Susie! How's it going?"
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"- I was walking to the door. He didn't open it. - Because the tie"
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"I'm so cool, I hang out with lesbians.""
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"...you know, I could use a haircut."
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"- Really? - Yes, yes. I can come to your house."
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"- Huh? Come on. Right? - All right."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- Right. Yeah. - Okay, okay."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"I don't function well with the feeling of heaviness."
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"You know, you could-- you could have groups"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"and talk about their problems."
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"Instead of sitting in a chair at your desk,"
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"And, uh, unfortunately, his parakeet died."
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"- What was he like? - Bird-like. He was bird-like."
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"- Yeah. - You know what? I'll cheer him up."
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"I'll send him a little text. How about that?"
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"Yeah, well, I think for death,"
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"Yes, perhaps if it were a person,"
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"I would agree with you."
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"- All right. Done. He's gonna love it. - ( phone chirps )"
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"Okay?"
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"And you...."
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"You have the refill."
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"You have the refill."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- And I will look that up. - Okay."
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"( muffled music thumping )"
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"- Come on. - What's up?"
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"Turn this down. It's too loud."
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"- I'll turn this shit down, okay? - ( music fades )"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You're lamping?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"and a tank top with my feet the fuck up."
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"And chillin' is what? You gotta be in real clothes?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"- You can walk around and chill. - Oh."
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"You guys got some great slang, I gotta say."
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"- Keep that bullshit. - Boss isn't--"
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"Hey, I wouldn't even say that shit by mistake."
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"Get this-- my assistant, okay,"
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"You shot a porno?"
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"- Seriously? - Yeah. Seriously."
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"You got to fire that bitch."
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"It's, you know-- she's got a--"
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"she's got a limp and a cane."
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"I can't. I can't do it."
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"I don't wanna say. I don't wanna talk about it."
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"Tell me what the fuck going on."
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"( sighs )"
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"- Recently? - No, no. Years ago."
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"she was so highly recommended, too."
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"He couldn't fire her either,"
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"every now and then, yeah, I gotta say, you surprise me."
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"Whoo."
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"Is that still workable?"
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"I'll stop your ass. You know I will."
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"( chuckles ) Now go upstairs and start lamping."
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"- Like, I can't even tell you. - Sure."
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"I just never thought that I'd be having a wedding."
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"- Have you been married? - I have, yes."
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"- Really? - "Can't you be excited?""
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"It-- it broke her heart. I-- there's no excitement."
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"Well, I'm excited,"
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"about how the whole thing works."
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"- Okay. - So, when the rabbi"
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""Do you take so-and-so--" what's your fiancée's name?"
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""Here Comes The Bride"? Who gets the song?"
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"- I'm getting that song. - You're getting the song?"
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
"You're getting "Here Comes the Bride"?"
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"I wanted to be the bride"
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"and Numa's actually always wanted to be the groom,"
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"- My dad walks me down the-- the thing. - Yeah, I know. Yeah."
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"I have a veil with, like,"
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"- No, it's-- um, it's amazing. - No."
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"Look, you got a picture of Numa?"
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"Okay, she's beautiful, obviously."
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"( scoffs ) Okay. That's a-- that's a bride, okay?"
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"- Numa. - Numa fine as fuck."
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"- Right? She is. - You are one lucky-ass groom."
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"Yeah, boy, you're gonna love that."
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"You're a lovely girl, Betty, but, uh,"
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"So, this is more of the kick-off,"
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"- Hi. Excuse me. - Hey!"
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"Yeah, I know what it stands for."
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"that actually focus on the clitoris and talk about it."
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"focused on the clitoris."
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"Oh, you know, I haven't seen you guys for so long."
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"- The divorce is almost final. - What?"
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"than when we were married."
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"That's total bullshit."
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"to wean yourself off the relationship."
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"- Wow. - Every producer I talked to."
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"I've got so many producers that want to do this."
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"Look at you, Mr. Broadway. ( scoffs )"
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"- Really? Do I need to do that? - Yep."
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"- 75. - She charged me $150."
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"- That's crazy. - I know it's crazy."
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"- Feel free. - Good."
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"Come here."
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"I took way more steps than you did to get here."
Curb Your Enthusiasm (2000)
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