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Clips from Rick and Morty - The ABCs of Beth (S03E03)

"Of course, if that's the case,"
Rick and Morty
"I expect he'd be worshiped as a kind of god"
Rick and Morty
"by a medieval-level society"
Rick and Morty
"You are now prisoners of our exalted ruler,"
Rick and Morty
"helper and consumer of mortality,"
Rick and Morty
"dispenser of life... Yes, if I could interrupt?"
Rick and Morty
"We're way ahead of the reveal here."
Rick and Morty
"I thought warrior priestesses"
Rick and Morty
"I hope it's not human season."
Rick and Morty
"Soul-bonded?"
Rick and Morty
"Um, does your planet have shorter days,"
Rick and Morty
"[ Sniffing ]"
Rick and Morty
"[ Whoosh ]"
Rick and Morty
"Go get him, honey!"
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"She's always hunting. [ Chuckles ]"
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"She probably knew a Varrix worked here,"
Rick and Morty
"and that's why she said the Yelp reviews didn't matter."
Rick and Morty
"how serious Krootabulon soul-bonding is?"
Rick and Morty
"Uh, gee, Morty, I don't know. It's got such a casual name."
Rick and Morty
"If you want to lecture anyone about commitment,"
Rick and Morty
"Oh, my God. Dad, is that what this is about?"
Rick and Morty
"Every weekend, you two have told me to move on."
Rick and Morty
"Like, stop using paper towels for toilet paper,"
Rick and Morty
"not move on into a sloppy rebound."
Rick and Morty
"Why don't you just say what you really mean?"
Rick and Morty
"that having sex with her gives me telekinesis"
Rick and Morty
"and you recognize she's got a hot bod"
Rick and Morty
"like Cheetara in "Thundercats,""
Rick and Morty
"but you're grossed out"
Rick and Morty
"by her avocado-shaped head and blue skin,"
Rick and Morty
"and you think I want to put a bag and a wig on her head."
Rick and Morty
"After all the time and energy I spent"
Rick and Morty
"teaching you two about race..."
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"Tomorrow, we celebrate."
Rick and Morty
"We could take the kids to the water park."
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"We celebrate with a hunt!"
Rick and Morty
"- Yes. - Yes."
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"All kneel for King Tommy!"
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"I'm not kneeling. Suck my dick."
Rick and Morty
"Well, hello, all!"
Rick and Morty
"but I go by another name, too."
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"- We know. - We know."
Rick and Morty
"I have lived here since I was a mere child."
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"- We know. - Got it."
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"I suppose you're wondering,"
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"how do I sustain myself?"
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"- Oh, boy. - No, we aren't."
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"- Ugh. - Seriously?"
Rick and Morty
"I am tiny Beth."
Rick and Morty
"[ Crowd boos ]"
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"Oh, come on."
Rick and Morty
"Come with me to a magic land."
Rick and Morty
"Froopy: Don't do it!"
Rick and Morty
"I am excited."
Rick and Morty
"and his dad who likes him."
Rick and Morty
"I take it Tommy wasn't class playwright."
Rick and Morty
"Well, I want to see you dead."
Rick and Morty
"Huh. Well, that's interesting."
Rick and Morty
"Fake news."
Rick and Morty
"Many nights have passed,"
Rick and Morty
"trapped in this strange land."
Rick and Morty
"I am hungry, and all I can do to pass the time is hump."
Rick and Morty
"I will hump this tree."
Rick and Morty
"And so I did."
Rick and Morty
"Oh, wow."
Rick and Morty
"Certified fresh. Good... Good job."
Rick and Morty
"No, that is the last thing that is in order! Ugh."
Rick and Morty
"Leave him alone. [ Shorts zip ]"
Rick and Morty
"All right, that's it. I'm outta here."
Rick and Morty
"We're in the middle of an adventure."
Rick and Morty
"Here's some things an adventure needs, Beth."
Rick and Morty
"Conflict, stakes, a way for me to benefit,"
Rick and Morty
"and, clearly, Morty."
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"raping Muppets and eating babies."
Rick and Morty
"Yep. Luckily, that's not our problem."
Rick and Morty
"Time to pull the plug."
Rick and Morty
"We have to get Tommy out of there, okay?"
Rick and Morty
"We... We need to do the right thing."
Rick and Morty
"Put in a little effort."
Rick and Morty
"All right, cut the high-road routine."
Rick and Morty
"You pushed him in the Honey Swamp, Beth."
Rick and Morty
"[ Scoffs ] You're gonna believe a play over your own daughter?"
Rick and Morty
"Yes, I am, Beth, because you're not my own daughter."
Rick and Morty
"Oh, God, yes."
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"I'm one of infinite Beths"
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"with infinite fathers in infinite universes."
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"You know why all Ricks made a Froopyland"
Rick and Morty
"for all their little girls?"
Rick and Morty
"by Tommy's overwritten, badly structured,"
Rick and Morty
"cheaply produced flashback."
Rick and Morty
"I didn't make Froopyland to get rid of you, Beth."
Rick and Morty
"I did it to protect the neighborhood."
Rick and Morty
"Not in a [burps] noble sense."
Rick and Morty
"It was just more practical to sequester you"
Rick and Morty
"before I had to start, you know, cloning a replacement"
Rick and Morty
"for every less-than-polite little boy or gullible animal"
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"that might cross your socio-path."
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"than admit that you were a bad father?"
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"Oh, dude, no."
Rick and Morty
"I'm a fuckin' nutcase."
Rick and Morty
"And the acorn plopped straight down, baby."
Rick and Morty
"Look at some of this shit"
Rick and Morty
"Ray guns."
Rick and Morty
"A whip that forces people to like you."
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"a teddy bear with anatomically correct innards,"
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"night-vision googly-eye glasses, sound-erasing sneakers,"
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"false fingerprints, fall-asleep darts,"
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"a lie-detecting doll, an indestructible baseball bat,"
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"a Taser shaped like a ladybug, a fake police badge,"
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"location-tracking stickers, rainbow-colored duct tape,"
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"mind-control hair clips, poison gum,"
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"a pink, sentient switchblade."
Rick and Morty
"Hi, Beth, you've gotten taller."
Rick and Morty
"Has it occurred to you"
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"that I asked you to make those things"
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"because I wanted you to spend time with me?"
Rick and Morty
"Has it occurred to you that if I did try killing Tommy,"
Rick and Morty
"it might be because I was jealous of his family?"
Rick and Morty
"Wait, what? Why?"
Rick and Morty
"Seems like it must be hereditary."
Rick and Morty
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