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Clips from South Park - Coon 2: Hindsight (S14E14)

"Wait a minute, look."
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"It's Captain Hindsight."
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"Oh, no!"
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"What seems to be the problem?"
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"It drilled into a marine sanctuary"
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"If we can't stop it, the spill could reach New Orleans."
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"Hmm. All right."
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"You see where that rig is drilling?"
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"Yes."
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"It's in too deep of water."
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"They shouldn't have drilled in that deep of water because now"
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"they can't get machines deep enough to fix the spill."
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"Yes, yes."
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"Now if it's a valve that ruptured,"
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"Hmm... Right."
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"Then they should have had a back up safety valve"
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"to that backup safety valve."
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"My god he's right."
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"My work here is done."
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"I'm off to find others in need."
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"God bless you!"
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"Can I help you?"
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"I understand this is where Captain Hindsight lives?"
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"I need to speak with him, please."
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"The Captain is very busy dealing with the gulf oil crisis."
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"Please, sit down, what can I do for you?"
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"I've been asked to give you some exciting news."
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"You have been preapproved to"
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"become the newest member of Coon and friends."
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"I know the Coon personally."
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"And I can tell you being a Coon friend is the very highest honor."
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"your first three months of dues have actually been waived."
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"This must be amazingly exciting for you."
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"Captain Hindsight, Captain Hindsight please come in."
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"Go ahead."
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"The oil keeps coming out."
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"We've got other rigs now catching fire."
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"Listen, they should have hosed down the other rigs as soon as the spill began."
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"Then that wouldn't have happened."
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"Right, thank you."
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"Captain Hindsight, the dolphins that those volunteers have cleaned of oil are dying."
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"Get down to the volunteers"
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"and tell them they should have used a nonbleaching cleanser."
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"Tell Brett Favre he should've never"
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"sent actual pictures of his shlong."
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"So anyways, if you want to just start filling out the form,"
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"Look, I'm sorry, kid, but I work alone."
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"and If you refuse to be a part of that union, you are a scab."
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"Get this kid out of here. I have to think."
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"Fine! You'll be hearing from my la-- the Coon's lawyer, sir!"
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"The BP oil spill in the gulf continues to get worse every day."
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"As public anger towards the BP"
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"company grows, their president released this statement."
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"President and CEO of BP."
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"Our accidental drilling spill AGAIN in the gulf is a tragedy that"
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"should have never happened."
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"we are deeply sorry."
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"We're sorry."
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"We're sorry."
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"We're sorry."
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"Sorry."
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"for cleaning up the spill in the gulf."
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"And in doing so, we have changed our name"
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"from beyond petroleum to dependable petroleum."
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"DP, we no longer fuck the earth, we DP it."
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"Gentlemen, my attempts to recruit Captain Hindsight into"
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"Coon vision on."
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"All we need to do is get"
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"pictures of Captain Hindsight naked with Courtney Love."
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"Then we'll tell him if he doesn't join us, we'll put them on the Internet."
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"How do we get pictures of him naked with Courtney Love"
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"Simple Toolshed."
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"Coon slide 2"
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"We dress Professor Chaos up as Courtney Love."
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"Take pictures of him naked with a homeless guy then photoshop Hindsight's face onto it it."
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"Me? Aww come on fellas,"
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"You want us to take naked pictures of Butters to use as blackmail?"
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"That's why you don't come up with the plans."
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"No no look. What's going on down in the gulf is much more important than blackmailing another hero."
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"Oh, who cares about some oil spill environment crap"
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"Mosquito has a good plan Cartman. Hear him out."
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"You don't know that I'm Cartman because my true identity is secret!"
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"We all have a say in this organization, Coon."
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"Let Mosquito talk."
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"All right, Mosquito."
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"How do you want to help people suffering in the gulf crisis?"
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"I think we should help raise money for the relief aid by having a bake sale."
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"A bake sale?"
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"I have a recipe from lemon bars from my mom."
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"We could wear our costumes outside the grocery store and sell lemon bars,"
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"We're super heroes, not fucking girl scouts."
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"Shut up Mintberry Crunch!"
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"You aren't even anything!"
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"No more picking on Mintberry Crunch."
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"But we're all equal."
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"Who wants to go with my plan?"
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"Sounds awesome. Let's do it."
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"To the grocery store!"
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"As we walked along the road to the grocery store, my"
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"Coon sense started tingling."
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"Something was wrong, very wrong"
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"I've learned to trust my Coon sense. It has always been my guide."
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"and so I knew I must act."
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"A Coon must know when to defend itself."
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"Well, now we're back to normal."
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"Just like before and all forgotten, right, right?"
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"Right, right. Right."
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"Cool! So what's next for Coon and friends?"
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"Another crisis in the gulf of Mexico as the oil company DP has"
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"once again made a huge error."
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"This time the oil company has accidentally ripped a hole into another dimension."
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"but didn't think drilling into it would prove problematic."
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"Now hundreds of creatures from another dimension are spilling"
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"out into our reality and wreaking havoc."
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"Hello. I'm Tony Hayward."
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"CEO of DP."
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"Tearing a hole into another dimension is a tragedy that"
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"And as CEO, I would like to say,"
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"We're sorry."
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"We're sorry."
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