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Clips from Seinfeld - The Fix Up (S03E03)

"What's with the eyebrows?"
Seinfeld
"You know what your problem is? Your standards are too high."
Seinfeld
"I went out with you."
Seinfeld
"That's because my standards are too low."
Seinfeld
"And by the way, women kill for eyebrows like that."
Seinfeld
"Do you know that? Women pluck their real eyebrows..."
Seinfeld
"...until they're bald, Jerry, bald above the eyes."
Seinfeld
"And then they paint in these eyebrows to look like that."
Seinfeld
"Well, let me tell you something about George."
Seinfeld
"He can run like the wind."
Seinfeld
"And he's strong."
Seinfeld
"I've seen him lift 100 pounds over his head without even knowing it."
Seinfeld
"You wouldn't know it to look at him, but George can bait a hook."
Seinfeld
"- He can really do that? - Come on, let's do it."
Seinfeld
"I think they'll really get along."
Seinfeld
"- What, are you into this? - Yeah, come on, it's a good match."
Seinfeld
"Wait. They'll be telling us how their dates went."
Seinfeld
"Are we gonna share that information?"
Seinfeld
"Naturally."
Seinfeld
"Everything."
Seinfeld
"- What if it worked out? - Yeah, right"
Seinfeld
"Out of the question."
Seinfeld
"Out of the question."
Seinfeld
"It's one step away from personal ads."
Seinfeld
"Then prostitutes."
Seinfeld
"No! No! I am not going down that road."
Seinfeld
"What does she look like?"
Seinfeld
"- Very good-looking. - Really good-looking?"
Seinfeld
"- Really very good-looking. - Would you take her out?"
Seinfeld
"- Yes, I would. - You hesitated."
Seinfeld
"- What hesitate? I didn't hesitate. - Something's up. You hesitated."
Seinfeld
"I'm telling you, she's good-looking."
Seinfeld
"- What about the body? - Good body. Nice body."
Seinfeld
"- How nice? - Nice. Pretty nice."
Seinfeld
"- Really good? - Really very nice and good."
Seinfeld
"- What about personality? - Good personality."
Seinfeld
"Funny. Bright."
Seinfeld
"All right, let's see. Let's see. What else? What else?"
Seinfeld
"What does she do?"
Seinfeld
"First of all, what does he do?"
Seinfeld
"He was in real estate."
Seinfeld
"He's not working right now."
Seinfeld
"Oh! He's not working? No. No. No."
Seinfeld
"Well, I mean, he got fired."
Seinfeld
"Why did he get fired?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, right. Well..."
Seinfeld
"He tried to... poison his boss."
Seinfeld
"Excuse me?"
Seinfeld
"It's such a long story. Seriously, he just had some problems at work."
Seinfeld
"- Is he nuts? - No, no, no."
Seinfeld
"He's a really, really funny guy."
Seinfeld
"What does he look like?"
Seinfeld
"- Pardon? - What does he look like?"
Seinfeld
"Well, he's got a lot of character in his face."
Seinfeld
"He's short. He's stocky."
Seinfeld
"He's fat."
Seinfeld
"Powerful."
Seinfeld
"He is so powerful. He can lift 100 pounds right up over his head."
Seinfeld
"And, what else? What else?"
Seinfeld
"He's, he's kind of- Just kind of- Losing his hair."
Seinfeld
"- He's bald? - No."
Seinfeld
"No, no, no. He's not bald."
Seinfeld
"He's balding."
Seinfeld
"- So he will be bald? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"Flowing?"
Seinfeld
"Flowing?"
Seinfeld
"Is it flowing? I like flowing, cascading hair."
Seinfeld
"Thick, lustrous hair is important to me."
Seinfeld
"Thick, lustrous hair is important to me."
Seinfeld
"Just clarifying."
Seinfeld
"Let me ask you this."
Seinfeld
"Do you want to get it out?"
Seinfeld
"Or do you want to not be able to get it out?"
Seinfeld
"- I'd like to be able to get it out. - I think you'll get it out."
Seinfeld
"What about the skin?"
Seinfeld
"I need a good cheek. I like a good cheek."
Seinfeld
"She's got a fine cheek."
Seinfeld
"There's a hue."
Seinfeld
"She's got great eyebrows. Women kill to have her eyebrows."
Seinfeld
"Who cares about eyebrows?"
Seinfeld
"But not too sweet. You could throw up from that."
Seinfeld
"I don't think you'll throw up."
Seinfeld
"She likes to throw up."
Seinfeld
"- Has he ever been married? - No."
Seinfeld
"Has he been close?"
Seinfeld
"He once spent a weekend with a woman."
Seinfeld
"He didn't really try to poison his boss."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, he did."
Seinfeld
"We had an incredible phone conversation."
Seinfeld
"We talked for, like, 20 minutes."
Seinfeld
"I threw away my notes in the middle of the call."
Seinfeld
"Is it timbre or tambre?"
Seinfeld
"- I think it's tambre. - Why'd I think timbre?"
Seinfeld
"She could do voice-overs."
Seinfeld
"You didn't tell me about her voice?"
Seinfeld
"So, Saturday night."
Seinfeld
"She had to be impressed by that conversation."
Seinfeld
"It was a great performance. I am unbelievable on the phone."
Seinfeld
"On the date, they should just have two phones on the table at the restaurant."
Seinfeld
"- Hi. - Hi!"
Seinfeld
"- Out we go Saturday night. - I know."
Seinfeld
"- So, what did she say? - You're getting together Saturday night."
Seinfeld
"- That's it? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"- She didn't mention the conversation? - No."
Seinfeld
"See? I don't get that."
Seinfeld
"We had a relaxed, stimulating, great conversation. She doesn't mention it?"
Seinfeld
"- Why not mention it? - What?"
Seinfeld
"She could have mentioned it."
Seinfeld
"All right. All right. I'll go on the date, but that's that."
Seinfeld
"- The guy from Jersey. - He just got a job at a condom factory."
Seinfeld
"- What will you do with all of them? - Oh, well..."
Seinfeld
"Take some, Jerry. Grab them."
Seinfeld
"No, thanks. They look like they came out of a cereal box."
Seinfeld
"Come on, Elaine, here. Take half a bag."
Seinfeld
"Half a bag?"
Seinfeld
"What am I, a hooker?"
Seinfeld
"Anyway, they look kind of cheap."
Seinfeld
"I'll take one."
Seinfeld
"It's possible."
Seinfeld
"The problem with the condom is still buying them."
Seinfeld
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