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Clips from Seinfeld - The Puerto Rican Day (S09E09)

"- This guy's giving me the stare-ahead. - The stare-ahead, I hate that."
Seinfeld
"I use it all the time."
Seinfeld
"Look at me. I am man."
Seinfeld
"I am you."
Seinfeld
"All right, he's letting you in. Thank you."
Seinfeld
"Oh, I know who it is. Stacy Keach."
Seinfeld
"My old buddy. Black Saab."
Seinfeld
"Maroon Golf."
Seinfeld
"Where you going, black Saab?"
Seinfeld
"You seem to be a tad askew."
Seinfeld
"Could you move your car back a little?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, sorry."
Seinfeld
"I seem to have cut you off."
Seinfeld
"All right. I know where this is going..."
Seinfeld
"...and I am going somewhere else."
Seinfeld
"I've been trying to leave this group for 10 years."
Seinfeld
"Well, that's rude."
Seinfeld
"- Can you believe her? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"- I'll see you later. - Where are you going?"
Seinfeld
"The movies. Blimp is playing right there."
Seinfeld
"You're going to that again? To do that stupid line?"
Seinfeld
"It's a performance, Jerry. Like what you do."
Seinfeld
"That's not what I do."
Seinfeld
"Hell, I guess it is."
Seinfeld
"You know, actually, Jerry, you haven't worked a room that big in a while."
Seinfeld
"Look at that guy's dog."
Seinfeld
"I hate it when their ears get flipped inside out like that."
Seinfeld
"Why doesn't he fix it?"
Seinfeld
"Hey! Fold your dog's ear back!"
Seinfeld
"This isn't moving."
Seinfeld
"- I could walk faster than this. - No, you can't."
Seinfeld
"Yes, I can. Here."
Seinfeld
"Now it's moving. Oh, yeah, I knew it."
Seinfeld
"Hey! Hey!"
Seinfeld
"Where to?"
Seinfeld
"That's cute. That's really cute."
Seinfeld
"Come on."
Seinfeld
"All right."
Seinfeld
"Ladies."
Seinfeld
"I-I haven't seen this before."
Seinfeld
"Oh, what is that dot?"
Seinfeld
"I think someone has one of those funny laser pointers."
Seinfeld
"Excuse me. Are you the guy with that funny laser?"
Seinfeld
"The laser's not funny. I'm funny."
Seinfeld
"Yeah. The thing is..."
Seinfeld
"...I had this little zinger of my own I wanted to try."
Seinfeld
"It's right in the explosion scene..."
Seinfeld
"...so if you could just leave me a little window..."
Seinfeld
"You know, my aunt had a thing removed with a laser."
Seinfeld
"All right, I don't wanna interrupt your meal, so..."
Seinfeld
"- Six runs in the bottom of the ninth- - I've gotta see this game."
Seinfeld
"This traffic's a killer, ain't it?"
Seinfeld
"We leave the car here. We take the plates off..."
Seinfeld
"...we scratch the serial number off the engine block and we walk away."
Seinfeld
"- Walk away? - Well, you've got insurance."
Seinfeld
"You tell them that the car was stolen, and then you get another one free."
Seinfeld
"- Isn't there a deductible? - All right, what is your deductible?"
Seinfeld
"- I don't know. - Yes."
Seinfeld
"- From what? - The car."
Seinfeld
"Which we're leaving, so the net is zero."
Seinfeld
"See, you pocket the money, if there is any, and you get a new car."
Seinfeld
"We're not leaving the car."
Seinfeld
"...you'll have to work this out with maroon Golf."
Seinfeld
"Absolutely not. He sped up."
Seinfeld
"Swing long, lined hard toward left-center field..."
Seinfeld
"I'm ready to talk."
Seinfeld
"Hey, there's that laser guy again. He's funny."
Seinfeld
"- I never meet anyone funny. - I know."
Seinfeld
"A sense of humor is so much more important to me..."
Seinfeld
"...than looks or hair."
Seinfeld
"That's gotta hurt!"
Seinfeld
"It's gotta hurt!"
Seinfeld
"Hurt!"
Seinfeld
"Because..."
Seinfeld
"Damn you, laser guy!"
Seinfeld
"You had to grab it all with your lowbrow laser shtick."
Seinfeld
"You're just a prop comic. Where's the craft?"
Seinfeld
"Look, it's on the bald guy."
Seinfeld
"I am so glad we came to this showing."
Seinfeld
"He wants you to acknowledge that you cut him off..."
Seinfeld
"- What's that? - You raise the hand, lower the head."
Seinfeld
"I'm sorry. The buttons are really big on the car."
Seinfeld
"I don't understand. I haven't read the manual."
Seinfeld
"You get my drift."
Seinfeld
"Hallelujah. Praise the Lord. But I'll take it."
Seinfeld
"All right. At last, we're finally getting out of here."
Seinfeld
"What's that on your forehead?"
Seinfeld
"Is that one of those laser pointers?"
Seinfeld
"Hey, Jerry, crank up the Floyd, it's a George Laserium."
Seinfeld
"Stay away from my breasts- Chest!"
Seinfeld
"See you around, maroon Golf."
Seinfeld
"And by the way, that was an I'm not sorry wave."
Seinfeld
"- What was that? - I'm glad I cut you off..."
Seinfeld
"...because black Saab rules."
Seinfeld
"So long, jackass."
Seinfeld
"Elaine?"
Seinfeld
"Jerry?"
Seinfeld
"Jackass. So I'm a jackass now?"
Seinfeld
"So if everyone would just put their cars in reverse at the same time..."
Seinfeld
"...we can do this."
Seinfeld
"All right, on the count of three. Can everyone hear me?"
Seinfeld
"Hey, Amigo, are you paying attention?"
Seinfeld
"Not you."
Seinfeld
"The guy in the Amigo."
Seinfeld
"Oh, yeah, sure. Now I'm gonna be stuck here."
Seinfeld
"But you knew the way to go. You went to college."
Seinfeld
"So don't talk to me about hardship."
Seinfeld
"Elaine, why did you have the cab come down this street?"
Seinfeld
"We were almost out."
Seinfeld
"So that was your girlfriend that blocked you in."
Seinfeld
"That's real good."
Seinfeld
"I'm not his girlfriend."
Seinfeld
"Well, actually, we used to date, but not anymore-"
Seinfeld
"- Elaine, he doesn't need- - Used to date."
Seinfeld
"So I guess you found out he's a jackass."
Seinfeld
"Because that's what's gonna happen."
Seinfeld
"Oh, he's giving you a mustache. Where is this guy?"
Seinfeld
"No, don't. Don't look around. That's what he wants."
Seinfeld
"All right, well, I'll see you."
Seinfeld
"Hey, George, I think there's a sniper looking to pop you."
Seinfeld
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