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Clips from Frasier - The Good Son (S01E01)

Roz, we have time for one more.

"Roz, we have time for one more."

Frasier

Hello, Russell, this is Dr Frasier Crane. I'm listening.

"Hello, Russell, this is Dr Frasier Crane. I'm listening."

Frasier

On top of that, my practice had grown stagnant

"On top of that, my practice had grown stagnant"

Frasier

and my social life consisted of hanging around a bar every night.

"and my social life consisted of hanging around a bar every night."

Frasier

Will you?

"Will you?"

Frasier

No, we cut to the news 30 seconds ago.

"No, we cut to the news 30 seconds ago."

Frasier

I can handle criticism. How was I today?

"I can handle criticism. How was I today?"

Frasier

and you kept referring to Jerry, with the identity crisis, as "Jeff".

"and you kept referring to Jerry, with the identity crisis, as "Jeff"."

Frasier

The fresh air's good for him.

"The fresh air's good for him."

Frasier

A home? He's still a young man.

"A home? He's still a young man."

Frasier

Dad, welcome to your new home.

"Dad, welcome to your new home."

Frasier

I can't be alone without falling on my ass and you're stuck with me.

"I can't be alone without falling on my ass and you're stuck with me."

Frasier

Why don't I take Dad's things into his new bachelor quarters

"Why don't I take Dad's things into his new bachelor quarters"

Frasier

Hey, that's the Space Needle there.

"Hey, that's the Space Needle there."

Frasier

This last week with Dad, it's been a living hell.

"This last week with Dad, it's been a living hell."

Frasier

Of course I do. Don't forget, Maris is five years older than I am.

"Of course I do. Don't forget, Maris is five years older than I am."

Frasier

These angels exist?

"These angels exist?"

Frasier

Niles, I can't thank you enough. I feel this urge to hug you.

"Niles, I can't thank you enough. I feel this urge to hug you."

Frasier

If I were Mother Teresa, I'd check my jewellery box.

"If I were Mother Teresa, I'd check my jewellery box."

Frasier

This is the last one. Try to keep an open mind.

"This is the last one. Try to keep an open mind."

Frasier

(English accent) Hello. Caught with me hand in the biscuit tin!

"(English accent) Hello. Caught with me hand in the biscuit tin!"

Frasier

No, he has worms.

"No, he has worms."

Frasier

as you can see from my résumé.

"as you can see from my résumé."

Frasier

Wait. I'm getting something on you. You're a florist.

"Wait. I'm getting something on you. You're a florist."

Frasier

- Dad! - You wanted me to pick one.

"- Dad! - You wanted me to pick one."

Frasier

She was wrong. This is a part-time position. It won't work out.

"She was wrong. This is a part-time position. It won't work out."

Frasier

You should talk about this. I'll just pop back in here

"You should talk about this. I'll just pop back in here"

Frasier

- I think it would be best if you leave. - Oh, all right.

"- I think it would be best if you leave. - Oh, all right."

Frasier

Use the can like the rest of the world.

"Use the can like the rest of the world."

Frasier

You'll adjust.

"You'll adjust."

Frasier

I've done enough adjusting. I'm in a new city, I've got a new job.

"I've done enough adjusting. I'm in a new city, I've got a new job."

Frasier

I'm separated from my little boy.

"I'm separated from my little boy."

Frasier

And now my father and his dog are living with me.

"And now my father and his dog are living with me."

Frasier

I had plans, too. This may be a shock, but one of them wasn't living with you.

"I had plans, too. This may be a shock, but one of them wasn't living with you."

Frasier

- After I'm gone, you can live guilt-free. - You think this is about guilt?

"- After I'm gone, you can live guilt-free. - You think this is about guilt?"

Frasier

I'm going out.

"I'm going out."

Frasier

I had a picture of what it was going to be like and then... I don't know.

"I had a picture of what it was going to be like and then... I don't know."

Frasier

All Lupe wanted was to be remembered.

"All Lupe wanted was to be remembered."

Frasier

Yes. Even if things may not happen like we planned, they can work out anyway.

"Yes. Even if things may not happen like we planned, they can work out anyway."

Frasier

All she wanted was to be remembered. Will you ever forget that story?

"All she wanted was to be remembered. Will you ever forget that story?"

Frasier

We have Martin on line one. He's having a problem with his son.

"We have Martin on line one. He's having a problem with his son."

Frasier

Hello, Martin. This is Dr Frasier Crane. I'm listening.

"Hello, Martin. This is Dr Frasier Crane. I'm listening."

Frasier

Perhaps your son wasn't sensitive in seeing how your life was changing.

"Perhaps your son wasn't sensitive in seeing how your life was changing."

Frasier

I'm sure he appreciated your candour.

"I'm sure he appreciated your candour."

Frasier

'They have trouble saying that stuff.'

"'They have trouble saying that stuff.'"

Frasier

- My pleasure, Martin. - 'You hear that? I said thank you!'

"- My pleasure, Martin. - 'You hear that? I said thank you!'"

Frasier

Hello, Claire. I'm listening.

"Hello, Claire. I'm listening."

Frasier

(Sobs) 'Well, I'm a mess!

"(Sobs) 'Well, I'm a mess!"

Frasier

♪ But I got you pegged!

"♪ But I got you pegged!"

Frasier

Listen to yourself, Bob.

"Listen to yourself, Bob."

Frasier

You follow her to work. You eavesdrop on her calls. You open her mail.

"You follow her to work. You eavesdrop on her calls. You open her mail."

Frasier

When you started doing these things, the relationship was over.

"When you started doing these things, the relationship was over."

Frasier

Yes. On line four, we have Russell from Kirkland.

"Yes. On line four, we have Russell from Kirkland."

Frasier

'I've been feeling sort of, you know, depressed lately.

"'I've been feeling sort of, you know, depressed lately."

Frasier

'My life's not going anywhere. It's not that bad.

"'My life's not going anywhere. It's not that bad."

Frasier

'It's just, same old apartment, same old job. Sometimes...'

"'It's just, same old apartment, same old job. Sometimes...'"

Frasier

We're at the end of our hour.

"We're at the end of our hour."

Frasier

I'll cut to the chase by using myself as an example.

"I'll cut to the chase by using myself as an example."

Frasier

Six months ago, I was living in Boston.

"Six months ago, I was living in Boston."

Frasier

My wife had left me, which was very painful.

"My wife had left me, which was very painful."

Frasier

Then she came back to me, which was excruciating.

"Then she came back to me, which was excruciating."

Frasier

I was clinging to a life that wasn't working.

"I was clinging to a life that wasn't working."

Frasier

I knew I had to do something, anything.

"I knew I had to do something, anything."

Frasier

Go, Seahawks!

"Go, Seahawks!"

Frasier

I took action, Russell, and you can too.

"I took action, Russell, and you can too."

Frasier

Move, change, do something. If it's a mistake, do something else.

"Move, change, do something. If it's a mistake, do something else."

Frasier

Russell? I think we lost him.

"Russell? I think we lost him."

Frasier

Oh, for crying out loud!

"Oh, for crying out loud!"

Frasier

I bare my soul to Seattle.

"I bare my soul to Seattle."

Frasier

They're listening to Chopper Dave's Rush Hour Roundup!

"They're listening to Chopper Dave's Rush Hour Roundup!"

Frasier

The rest of the show was pretty good. It was a good show, wasn't it?

"The rest of the show was pretty good. It was a good show, wasn't it?"

Frasier

Your brother called.

"Your brother called."

Frasier

We call that "avoidance". Don't change the subject. Tell me what you think.

"We call that "avoidance". Don't change the subject. Tell me what you think."

Frasier

Did I ever tell you what this button does?

"Did I ever tell you what this button does?"

Frasier

I am not a piece of Lalique.

"I am not a piece of Lalique."

Frasier

You dropped two commercials, left a total of 28 seconds of dead air,

"You dropped two commercials, left a total of 28 seconds of dead air,"

Frasier

scrambled the call letters, spilt yoghurt on the control board,

"scrambled the call letters, spilt yoghurt on the control board,"

Frasier

You say my brother called?

"You say my brother called?"

Frasier

"lf I want to rake gravel every ten minutes for inner harmony,

""lf I want to rake gravel every ten minutes for inner harmony,"

Frasier

"I'll move to Yokohama."

""I'll move to Yokohama.""

Frasier

This offends him, so he starts pulling up Maris' prized camellias.

"This offends him, so he starts pulling up Maris' prized camellias."

Frasier

I couldn't stand for that.

"I couldn't stand for that."

Frasier

I marched inside and locked the door until he cooled down.

"I marched inside and locked the door until he cooled down."

Frasier

Would you have handled it differently?

"Would you have handled it differently?"

Frasier

Sorry, Niles. I didn't realise you'd stopped talking.

"Sorry, Niles. I didn't realise you'd stopped talking."

Frasier

You haven't heard a word!

"You haven't heard a word!"

Frasier

You're a shrink. You know how it is

"You're a shrink. You know how it is"

Frasier

Touché. And on that subject, I heard your show today.

"Touché. And on that subject, I heard your show today."

Frasier

- And? - You know my view of pop psychiatry.

"- And? - You know my view of pop psychiatry."

Frasier

And everything. When was the last time you had an unexpressed thought?

"And everything. When was the last time you had an unexpressed thought?"

Frasier

- You guys ready? - Two cafelatte supremos.

"- You guys ready? - Two cafelatte supremos."

Frasier

No, thank you.

"No, thank you."

Frasier

So, Frasier, how are you doing on your own?

"So, Frasier, how are you doing on your own?"

Frasier

I'm fine. I love my new life.

"I'm fine. I love my new life."

Frasier

I love the solitude. I miss Frederick, of course.

"I love the solitude. I miss Frederick, of course."

Frasier

He's playing goalie on the pee-wee soccer team. Chip off the old block.

"He's playing goalie on the pee-wee soccer team. Chip off the old block."

Frasier

- You hated sports. - So does he!

"- You hated sports. - So does he!"

Frasier

Well, this has been fun.

"Well, this has been fun."

Frasier

- There's a problem we should discuss. - Is it Dad?

"- There's a problem we should discuss. - Is it Dad?"

Frasier

One of his old police buddies called.

"One of his old police buddies called."

Frasier

- Oh, my God! - He's fine.

"- Oh, my God! - He's fine."

Frasier

- Is it his hip again? - I don't think he can live alone now.

"- Is it his hip again? - I don't think he can live alone now."

Frasier

What can we do?

"What can we do?"

Frasier

This won't be anyone's favourite solution,

"This won't be anyone's favourite solution,"

Frasier

You can't take care of him. You're getting your new life together.

"You can't take care of him. You're getting your new life together."

Frasier

We were never simpatico.

"We were never simpatico."

Frasier

Of course, I can't take care of him.

"Of course, I can't take care of him."

Frasier

Oh, yes, of course. Why?

"Oh, yes, of course. Why?"

Frasier

- Dad doesn't get along with Maris. - Who does?

"- Dad doesn't get along with Maris. - Who does?"

Frasier

I thought you liked my Maris.

"I thought you liked my Maris."

Frasier

I do. I like her from a distance.

"I do. I like her from a distance."

Frasier

You know, the way you like the sun. Maris is like the sun,

"You know, the way you like the sun. Maris is like the sun,"

Frasier

except without the warmth.

"except without the warmth."

Frasier

Well, then, we're agreed about what to do with Dad.

"Well, then, we're agreed about what to do with Dad."

Frasier

"Golden Acres. We care so you don't have to."

""Golden Acres. We care so you don't have to.""

Frasier

- It says that? - It might as well.

"- It says that? - It might as well."

Frasier

- You're a good son, Frasier. - Oh, God, I am, aren't l?

"- You're a good son, Frasier. - Oh, God, I am, aren't l?"

Frasier

Two cafe supremos. Anything to eat?

"Two cafe supremos. Anything to eat?"

Frasier

No, I seem to have lost my appetite.

"No, I seem to have lost my appetite."

Frasier

I'll have a large piece of cheesecake.

"I'll have a large piece of cheesecake."

Frasier

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