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Clips from Bob's Burgers - Torpedo (S01E01)

"Joining your Wonder Wharf mascots today is"
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"a special guest food,"
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"a burger!"
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"A boy who is also a burger."
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"And I have my gun."
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"Ready, set..."
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"Go get 'em, Gene!"
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"I reinforced the crotch so he wouldn't tear it."
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"Win, Gene! Avenge Dad's death!"
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"Down goes Sammy Sea Lion!"
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"Ooh! It's a two-mascot race!"
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"Burger and Captain Pel I. Can."
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"There they go,"
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"bew...!"
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"The burger is your winner!"
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"Well, congratulations, young burger."
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"Ladies and gentlemen,"
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"you can purchase delicious burgers that look somewhat"
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"like him right here at the park."
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"And at my family's restaurant."
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"And, uh, what's the name of that restaurant?"
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"Ah... it's, it's..."
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"Bob's Burgers!"
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"Bob's Burgers!"
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"It's... Oh, God... Gene! No!"
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"Never mind. Never mind. That's okay."
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"Bob's Burgers! Oh, my God!"
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"You can get everything you expect from a burger"
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"at whatever the name of his restaurant is..."
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"Oh, oh, I just remembered! I just remembered!"
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"It's too late."
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"But you can get them here at the park, today."
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"No! Say it!"
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"I won something! I won! I won! I won something!"
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"Tell that to your grandkids. I will."
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"Gene, are you kidding me?!"
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"The name of the restaurant is Bob's Burgers!"
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"I think of it as Dad's Burgers!"
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"You live above it! You work in it every day!"
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"Bob, calm down. Calm down. Calm down."
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"I'm fine. I'm fine. He did great."
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"Strike three. You're out!"
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"I love that burger of yours, Bob."
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"Hey, after the game, let's all go to Bob's Burgers!"
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"Whoo!"
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"Ooh, Angel!"
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"Do they call you that 'cause you're such a good boy?"
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"I did many bad things to escape Cuba."
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"Aw..."
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"How about another beer?"
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"Man, you kids got a great dad, you know that?"
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"One wife. One family. That's the way to do it."
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"You know, in the majors, most guys got a whole bunch"
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"of families spread out over the 50 states."
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"When it's regular season, it's open season, if you know"
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"what I'm talkin' about."
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"you tell 'em you'll miss 'em, and you do."
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"But you still take some of their toys"
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"and re-gift 'em for your away kids."
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"And three great husbands."
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"Mr. Torpedo, I couldn't help but notice"
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"that the tall boy was looking a little lethargic."
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"Yeah, he's got Lupus or rickets or somethin'."
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"I don't know why we keep giving that job to these sick kids."
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"I was wondering if I could offer my services."
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"I'm very healthy."
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"Okay, okay, okay. Whoa, whoa. Hey, you got the job."
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"Just stop doing that."
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"Here's your first ball girl duty:"
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"Okay."
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"Here's the tabacco you wanted."
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"And your comic books."
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"Phe-Nom, is it possible"
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"to be in love with 25 people at once?"
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"You're my favorite."
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"Don't tell Angel. He's fiery."
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"Strike three!"
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"Sound the alarm because Torpedo is on fire!"
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"Fire! Fire! Fire!"
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"Not a good idea, Burt. It's a crowded stadium."
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"That Torpedo is amazing!"
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"No, he hasn't been good in a long time."
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"Here ya go, Bob, little souvenir."
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"Thanks, buddy!"
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"Whoa, slippery."
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"What does this smell like?"
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"Get it?"
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"Oh, crap. Torpedo's putting my grease on the ball."
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"That's how his skadootch is skadootching so much."
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"No, Lin, Torpedo is using my burger grease to cheat."
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"Oh."
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"So you helped Torpedo cheat."
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"If that means the Wonderdogs keep coming"
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"to the restaurant"
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"bringing all sorts of business with them,"
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"I don't even know what to think about this."
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"I gotta go take a leak."
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"Oh, get me an ice cream in a mini-helmet!"
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"Oh, I, uh..."
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"You... don't hold your... when you pee."
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"Okay."
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"Um, well, what if you found out that someone you knew"
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"and you were helping them do that sort of bad thing..."
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"Is it me? Is it abortions?"
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"and he's using my grease to do it."
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"Mm-mm."
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"Oh. Come walk with me."
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"Come behind the scenes!"
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"Torpedo's dazzling pitching is putting more butts in seats"
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"Is the roller coaster going to be okay"
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"without those huge planks of wood?"
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"Sure, sure!"
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"These people aren't paying for extra wood, Bob."
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"No one wants to ride Extra Wood Mountain."
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"Ow!"
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"People come to baseball games"
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"for the same reason they come to the amusement park:"
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"To be entertained!"
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"Does it really matter if the games are rigged? No!"
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"The games are rigged? Yes!"
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