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Clips from The Simpsons - Homer the Heretic (S04E04)

"[ Line Ringing ]"
The Simpsons
"- Hello. This is Homer Simpson. - [ Man ] Homer, can you name that title?"
The Simpsons
"- [ Cash Register Ringing ] - Whoo-hoo!"
The Simpsons
"- How's that door coming, Willy? - Miracles are your department, Reverend."
The Simpsons
"Card table for sale. Top badly damaged. Leg missing."
The Simpsons
"[ Woman On TV] You must be the three chiropractors I sent for."
The Simpsons
"[Curly]Hey, Moe, we don't know nothin' about manipulatin."
The Simpsons
"- [Moe] You heard the lady. Grab her spine and get crackin. - [Punch Landing]"
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"- [ Chuckling ] Moe is their leader. - [Curly Whooping]"
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"-[Moe] Why, you! -[Punch Landing] -[Curly]Hey!"
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"Come on, TV. Give me some of that sweet, sweet pap."
The Simpsons
"Well, let's define our terms, gentlemen."
The Simpsons
"Are we talking about redistricting or are we talking about reapportionment?"
The Simpsons
"Oh, well, can't win 'em all."
The Simpsons
"- Yes! - [ Whistle Blowing ]"
The Simpsons
"- [ Engine Not Turning Over] - [Marge Imitating Engine]"
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"[ Imitating Engine ]"
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"- Give it a little more gas. - [Pedal Banging]"
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"- What? What would help? - Nothing."
The Simpsons
"Oh, doctor. A 98-yard triple reverse..."
The Simpsons
"We have seen nothing but razzle-dazzle here today..."
The Simpsons
"and the astonishing return of Jim Brown."
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"Whoo-hoo!"
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"Is that what I think it is?"
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"Could this be the best day of my life?"
The Simpsons
"[ Laughing ]"
The Simpsons
"I, on the other hand, have been having the best day of my life..."
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"and I owe it all to skipping church."
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"Homer, are you actually giving up your faith?"
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"No. No, no, no, no, no, no."
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"I can't believe you're giving up church, Homer."
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"Hey, what's the big deal about going to some building every Sunday?"
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"- I mean, isn't God everywhere? - Amen, brother."
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"And don't you think that the Almighty has better things to worry about..."
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"Lord, my husband is by no means perfect..."
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"but he's a kind, decent man."
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"No, Homer."
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"He doesn't mean to be sacrilegious, Lord."
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"Thou has forsaken my church!"
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"- Well, kind of, but-- - But what?"
The Simpsons
"Does St. Louis still have a team?"
The Simpsons
"- No, they moved to Phoenix. - Oh, yeah."
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"That Reverend Lovejoy really displeases me."
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"I think I'll give him a canker sore."
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"and worship you in my own way."
The Simpsons
"Why are you dedicating your life to blasphemy?"
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"Hello, my animal friends. Peace be with you."
The Simpsons
"Well, I wasn't sure I was doing the right thing..."
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"but then God himself told me I should seek a new path."
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"- Oh, really? - Yeah. He appeared before me in a dream..."
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"and I knew that was special because I usually dream about naked... Marge."
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"- What'd he look like? - Perfect teeth, nice smell, a class act all the way."
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"Homer, you're crazy! Tell him this is all crazy."
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""And he left them and went out of the city into Bethany and he lodged there"?"
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"Yeah. Think about it."
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"The, uh, Feast of Maximum Occupancy."
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"It's great. No hell, no kneeling--"
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"## [ Flanders Family Singing ]"
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"## [ Singing ]"
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"- Leave me alone. - Dad, the heathen's getting away."
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"I see him, son."
The Simpsons
"[ Crossing Bells Dinging ]"
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"[ Horn Blaring ]"
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"[ Chuckles ]"
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"- Where we going? - Garbage Island."
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"[ Screaming ]"
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"Let's go, kids."
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"How come we have to go to church and Dad gets to stay home and watch cartoons?"
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"[ Groans ]"
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"well, wicked."
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"He had long hair and some wild ideas..."
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"I forget that too. Marge, you know who I'm talking about."
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"- He used to drive that blue car. - Kids, could you wait outside for us?"
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"because you just can't win."
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"[ Man On TV] Coming up next: make your own ladder."
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"Very sure."
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"Oooh, a interview with Lorne Michaels."
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"Oooh. Wait. That's no good."
The Simpsons
""Our unabashed dictionary defines I.U.D. as..."
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""love springs internal."'"
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"Hello."
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"I'm collecting for the Brotherhood of Jewish Clowns."
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"Last year, tornadoes claimed the lives of75Jewish clowns."
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"The worst incident was during our convention in Lubbock, Texas."
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"It was terrible. [ Sobbing ]"
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"the god of worldly wisdom located in the employee lounge."
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"you must've been out taking a whiz."
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"Mr. Simpson, please pay for your purchases and get out and come again."
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"Pride goeth before destruction!"
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"Marge, turn down the heat."
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"[ Screams ] Fire! What do I do? What do I do?"
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"Oh, the song, the song."
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"## [ Singing ]"
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"D'oh! [ Coughing ]"
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"[Apu Gasps] Fire at the old Simpson place!"
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"[ Quacking ]"
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"You ducks are really trying my patience!"
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"But you're so cute."
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"[ Homer Moans ]"
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"Dear Lord, may your loving hand guide Homer to the mattress, square and true."
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"Okay."
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"Heck, you'd have done the same for me."
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"- [ Bart, Lisa ] Dad! - Oh, Homie, are you all right?"
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"Our magazines and roach traps, gone. All gone."
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"[ Cat Screeching ]"
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"Hey, what are these axes for?"
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"- I don't know. Chopping stuff. - Gotcha."
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"Truly, this was an act of God."
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"Hey, wait a minute. Flanders is a regular Charlie Church..."
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"and God didn't save his house."
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"- D'oh! - Any valuables in the house?"
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"Well, the Picasso, my collection of classic cars--"
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"Coming up next, which work better--"
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"springy clothespins or the other kind?"
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"- Yes, the lesson is-- - No, don't tell me. I'll get it."
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"Oh, I know. The Lord is vengeful."
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"O Spiteful One, show me who to smite, and they shall be "smoten.""
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"when they went to your aid..."
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"- Aw, that's super. - I was rude to every one of you."
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"And you saved my life when you could have just left me to fry..."
The Simpsons
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