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Clips from Friends - The One with All the Poker (S01E01)

"If you're gonna work for mechanics, those are the ones."
Friends
"Guys, I'm going for anything here. I can't be a waitress anymore."
Friends
"I'm sick of the lousy tips. I'm sick of being called "Excuse Me.""
Friends
"Nothing. I'm sure they'll be impressed with your "compuper" skills."
Friends
"No, I'm sure the Xerox machine caught a few."
Friends
"Read them."
Friends
"Little playthings with yarn?"
Friends
"Look, I'm totally over her."
Friends
"- No, we're fine. - Okay."
Friends
"- Thank you. - We were playing poker"
Friends
"And then he did."
Friends
"No."
Friends
"- But you could teach us. - No."
Friends
"- Oh, good for you! - Congratulations!"
Friends
"Oh, you're"
Friends
"It's got to be like chips or dip or pretz"
Friends
"You sure? Phoebe just threw away two jacks because they didn't look happy."
Friends
"Eight."
Friends
"Damn it, damn it, damn it!"
Friends
"Joey had two fives showing, so for you to raise was"
Friends
"Downright gutsy."
Friends
"Sorry to break up this party, but I've got to go fax resumes before work."
Friends
"The Jamestown colony of Virginia."
Friends
"That's fine with me. Could use some money."
Friends
"Yes, and I get my ya-yas from KEA."
Friends
"For me to win, others have to lose."
Friends
"You are not putting that on again."
Friends
"You believe what a jerk Ross was being?"
Friends
"What?"
Friends
""Hello, kettle? This is Monica. You're black!""
Friends
"I'm not as bad as Ross."
Friends
"- I got an interview! - You're kidding! Where?"
Friends
"- Nice earrings. - Thank you."
Friends
"Listen, I'm parked at a meter. Let's do it. Okay?"
Friends
"How is Nathan?"
Friends
"It should be so simple."
Friends
"Ross, could we please listen to anything else?"
Friends
"I'm gonna pay for that tonight."
Friends
"And I went to camp with her cousin."
Friends
"I'll take it. Bad things happen to me anyway."
Friends
"So that just leaves the big Greene poker machine, who owes 15."
Friends
"It's so typical. "I'm a man! I have a penis!"
Friends
"I have to win money to exert my power over women!""
Friends
"We'll take every last dime you have. And you'll hate yourselves forever!"
Friends
"- Hand me the cards! - Can I?"
Friends
"Wanna give us your money now? We can skip the formality of really playing."
Friends
"That's jo-incidence with a "C"!"
Friends
"Me too. What do you got?"
Friends
"I got four sixes! I won! I actually won! Oh, my God!"
Friends
"Well, I have got your money And you'll never see it"
Friends
"I fold like a hooker who got hit in the stomach..."
Friends
"I will see you and I'll raise you. Do you wanna waste another buck?"
Friends
"- No. - Show them!"
Friends
"Plus, that shirt doesn't really match those pants."
Friends
"Hello. Rachel Greene."
Friends
"Hello?"
Friends
"I'm in."
Friends
"I see your 50 cents..."
Friends
"- Not at all. - No."
Friends
"Loser?"
Friends
"I see your $20..."
Friends
"I saw your $25 and I raise you..."
Friends
"teen!"
Friends
"Full house."
Friends
"- That's tough to beat. - I thought we had it!"
Friends
"But look how happy she is."
Friends
"That's a bird?"
Friends
"Okay, it's my turn."
Friends
"The Unbearable Lightness of Being!"
Friends
"That you get?!"
Friends
"We're running low on resumes."
Friends
"You want a job with Popular Mechanics?"
Friends
"- Paper cut! Paper cut! - Here."
Friends
"Grapefruit juice! Grapefruit juice!"
Friends
"Okay, we're almost done. Only 20 more to go."
Friends
"- Rach, did you proofread these? - Yeah. Why?"
Friends
"Oh, my God! Do you think it's on all of them?"
Friends
"They call this a love seat but I'm not feeling anything special towards you."
Friends
"- Hey, guys. - Hey."
Friends
"Hi, ladies."
Friends
"- Lots of responses. - Really? Sure, we have scones left!"
Friends
""Dear Miss Greene: Thank you for your inquiry. However""
Friends
"- We have apple cinnamon - "Dear Ms. Greene...." Yeah, yeah! No."
Friends
"Give me that."
Friends
"Linda's great. Why won't you go out with her?"
Friends
"- I don't know. - Is this about her..."
Friends
"..."The Flintstones could have really happened" thing?"
Friends
"It's not just that. I want someone who does something for me..."
Friends
"...who gets my heart pounding."
Friends
"Could you want her more?"
Friends
"Who?"
Friends
"Dee, the sarcastic sister from What's Happening!"
Friends
"- Hi! - Coffee?"
Friends
"- Shut up! - We're not saying anything."
Friends
"- What? - Joey cried last night."
Friends
"There was chocolate on the three. It looked like an eight."
Friends
"You should have seen him. "Read them and weep!""
Friends
"Yeah, what is that? Like some kind of sexist guy thing?"
Friends
"- It's poker, so only guys can play? - No. Women can play."
Friends
"Then, what is it? Some kind of, like, some kind of, you know"
Friends
"All right, what is it?"
Friends
"There are just no women in our game."
Friends
"That is a lame excuse. It's a typical guy response."
Friends
"Do you know how to play?"
Friends
"Okay, so now we draw cards."
Friends
"So I wouldn't need any. I have a straight."
Friends
"The 10 of spades and the 6 of clubs."
Friends
"- No, you can't - I have the 10 of spades! Here."
Friends
"Thanks!"
Friends
"- No, you can't do that. - Don't need them. I'm going for fours."
Friends
"You're going for fours. Chandler, could you? Thanks, man."
Friends
"What are you doing?"
Friends
"In poker, there's no food with more than one syllable."
Friends
"I hope you'll let it slide just this once. I was all out of "pretz.""
Friends
"Now the dealer"
Friends
"We got it. Let's play for real. High stakes. Big bucks!"
Friends
"Okay, last-minute lesson! Joey...."
Friends
"Three."
Friends
"Yes?"
Friends
"- I see, so you were lying. - About what?"
Friends
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