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Clips from Family Guy - Mother Tucker (S05E05)

"And that's Dicky, the Punch Line Donkey, on 97.1."
Family Guy
"Cool weekends. - On the radio."
Family Guy
"In the morning. - FM. Cool."
Family Guy
"- WQHG. Cool weekends. - In the morning."
Family Guy
"- On 97. 1. - 97. 1."
Family Guy
"And now back to Round Table,"
Family Guy
"with Al Michaels, Harold Ramis, Ray Romano and Kermit the Frog."
Family Guy
"Rezoning laws are infringing on the rights of citizens."
Family Guy
"If I might interrupt for a minute, I'd like to point out..."
Family Guy
"You've had your time. Let someone else speak."
Family Guy
"I haven't said a word. It was that guy."
Family Guy
"Don't look at me. I can't get a word in edgewise."
Family Guy
"Well, then who the hell's been talking this whole time?"
Family Guy
"- Thelma. - Hello, darling."
Family Guy
"- Mom, what are you doing here? - Peter, I left your father."
Family Guy
"I never see you, and then you finally come visit me"
Family Guy
"and you drop a bombshell like this?"
Family Guy
"This is just like what happened at the Peanuts reunion."
Family Guy
"Your old punching bag, Charlie Brown."
Family Guy
"Everybody wish Snoopy was here? And Woodstock?"
Family Guy
"That's right, he got it from me."
Family Guy
"I swear I didn't know how strong it was."
Family Guy
"And now he's dead. They're both dead."
Family Guy
"I don't give a crap about Woodstock, but Snoopy..."
Family Guy
"Get off me, you skank."
Family Guy
"- I can't believe you left Dad. - I have needs that he didn't satisfy."
Family Guy
"And I'm still a young woman, Peter. 82 is the new 74."
Family Guy
"I'm putting my fine ass back on the market."
Family Guy
"Boy, this is really going to upset my evil brother, Thaddeus."
Family Guy
"This will surely affect my inheritance."
Family Guy
"Hi, there, I'm Brian Griffin,"
Family Guy
"and you're listening to The Lunch Hour, serving up food for the mind."
Family Guy
"Today's entree is politics. What's on your mind today?"
Family Guy
"The governor's budget? Stem cell research?"
Family Guy
"Give us a hot spoonful of your opinion. Okay, we have a question from Quahog."
Family Guy
"Caller, you're on The Lunch Hour. Can I take your order?"
Family Guy
"Yes, I'll have a big helping of the pretentious crap."
Family Guy
"Sometimes the crazy ones get through."
Family Guy
"Okay, we have Rose from Cranston on the phone."
Family Guy
"Welcome, Rose, can I take your order?"
Family Guy
"Yes, that turkey,"
Family Guy
"that raw turkey that you ate off the counter last week that got Lois mad,"
Family Guy
"when you pooped that out, was the timer still in there?"
Family Guy
"And we're out of time. This has been The Lunch Hour."
Family Guy
"Join us next week, when our guest will be Gore Vidal."
Family Guy
"And remember, life is full of entrees, so don't fill up on bread."
Family Guy
"I'm gonna throw you now to Weenie and the Butt in the afternoon."
Family Guy
"Weenie and the Butt."
Family Guy
"97. 1. - In the afternoon."
Family Guy
"- Oh, my God. - WQHG."
Family Guy
"Turn it on and rip the knob off."
Family Guy
"- He thinks he's hilarious. - He is hilarious."
Family Guy
"but the banter you did with that guy..."
Family Guy
"Well, as we say in the radio business,"
Family Guy
""If you put that on the radio, people will listen to it. ""
Family Guy
"Make him part of the show."
Family Guy
"Well, I guess he couldn't be any worse than Tim McCarver is at sportscasting."
Family Guy
"In my view, as good as the Yankees were in the first half of this game,"
Family Guy
"that's how as bad they've been now."
Family Guy
"Poor Peter. I know he's having a hard time with this whole divorce thing."
Family Guy
"I feel kind of guilty that I'm here looking for a date."
Family Guy
"Thelma, stop that. You have a right to be happy."
Family Guy
"And there's a lot of great people here. Why don't you mingle?"
Family Guy
"- Oh, my God, Lois, you single now? - No, Glenn, I'm here with Thelma."
Family Guy
"- Who's Thelma? - This is Thelma."
Family Guy
"I don't know if this is gonna work, Lois. I'm a little shy at these types of things."
Family Guy
"You can overcome shyness."
Family Guy
"Think of the spider in Charlotte's Web who had to overcome Tourette's."
Family Guy
"I don't know, Lois."
Family Guy
"I haven't met a single interesting person."
Family Guy
"Good evening. I'm Tom Tucker, trying to get back on my feet"
Family Guy
"after having my ass handed to me by my bitch of an ex-wife."
Family Guy
"- I'm Thelma. - I'll just be going."
Family Guy
"Can I get you some punch?"
Family Guy
"Oh, no. You see, if you're one of 10 million Americans like me..."
Family Guy
"- Like me. - Like me."
Family Guy
"...with a bladder control problem, punch just goes right through you."
Family Guy
"I didn't hear you come in last night."
Family Guy
"Did you have a good time at your prostitutes' convention?"
Family Guy
"Peter, I was just trying to help your mother meet some new friends."
Family Guy
"Lois, you're too nosey."
Family Guy
"Like that waiter at that restaurant."
Family Guy
"And who had the prime rib?"
Family Guy
"I hardly think that's any of your business."
Family Guy
"Come on, Mom, you can't stay in bed all day."
Family Guy
"You gotta call Dad and get back together with..."
Family Guy
"Holy crap!"
Family Guy
"We'll have more on these new developments after this."
Family Guy
"I can't believe what I saw in there."
Family Guy
"You were messing around in what was basically my first apartment."
Family Guy
"Peter, you should be happy for her."
Family Guy
"- She's just having fun. - I don't see what the problem is."
Family Guy
"Tom is a wonderful man."
Family Guy
"I don't see the problem, either,"
Family Guy
"but let's go to Ollie Williams for the in-depth analysis. Ollie?"
Family Guy
"- Lady's old. - Thanks, Ollie. Over to you, Peter."
Family Guy
"I mean, you guys are like Harold and Maude."
Family Guy
"What would your grandchildren think?"
Family Guy
"I would be remiss in my duty"
Family Guy
"if I did not tell you"
Family Guy
"that the idea of... intercourse"
Family Guy
"and the fact of your firm young body"
Family Guy
"commingling with... withered flesh,"
Family Guy
"oh, baby!"
Family Guy
"makes me want to vomit."
Family Guy
"Peter, you can't talk to Tom that way."
Family Guy
"He won a local Emmy for his work with the retardeds."
Family Guy
"They certainly wanted to hug me. Maybe, in time, you will, too."
Family Guy
"All right, look. Let's get one thing straight, Stewie."
Family Guy
"The only reason you're here is that my boss ordered me to bring you on."
Family Guy
"All right? This is my show, and it's a serious, intellectual hour of discussion,"
Family Guy
"- and I want to keep it that way. - Hey, no problem."
Family Guy
"All right. In three, two, one."
Family Guy
"This is The Lunch Hour with your host..."
Family Guy
"Hey, what's up, Quahog?"
Family Guy
"From the station that reaches the beaches, you're listening to Dingo and the Baby."
Family Guy
"97. 1, Quahog."
Family Guy
"[burp, fart]"
Family Guy
"They're just wacky sounds, you know, to liven things up."
Family Guy
"- D-i-n-g-o. - Dingo."
Family Guy
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