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Clips from Rick and Morty - Pilot (S01E01)

"Everyone wants to take this to a racial place."
Rick and Morty
"I won't let them."
Rick and Morty
"This this guy he doesn't understand interstellar currency."
Rick and Morty
"It's, like, I'm trying to eat"
Rick and Morty
"a flimflam like, that's what we eat on girvonesk."
Rick and Morty
"I don't like it here, Morty. I can't abide bureaucracy."
Rick and Morty
"I don't like being told where to go and what to do."
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"I consider it a violation."
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"Did you get those seeds all the way up your butt?"
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"Let's just get this over with, okay?"
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"I mean, these things are pointy."
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"They hurt."
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"I'm gonna be able to do all kind of things with them."
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"All kinds of science."
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"It's a new machine."
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"It detects stuff all the way up your butt."
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"Ohhhhh!"
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"You know me I'm just trying to-"
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"I need to type in the coordinates to our home world, Morty."
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"It's okay to shoot them! They're robots!"
Rick and Morty
"Glenn's bleeding to death!"
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"Someone call his wife and children!"
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"They're not robots, Rick!"
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"It's a figure of speech, Morty."
Rick and Morty
"Just keep shooting, Morty."
Rick and Morty
"You have no idea what prison is like here!"
Rick and Morty
"Did you just come into the cafeteria through a portal?"
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"Uh, yeah."
Rick and Morty
"Well, you know, my my Ferrari's in the shop."
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"You can get his number later. Come on, Morty."
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"We got to get out of here."
Rick and Morty
"Oh, look, honey. It's our son with Albert Ein-douche."
Rick and Morty
"What?"
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"Oh, hi, Jerry."
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"Oh, my goodness, Morty!"
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"We talked about this."
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"Your your parents and I are very disappointed in in this behavior."
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"No? No takers?"
Rick and Morty
"You guys should really not be touching that stuff."
Rick and Morty
"Dad, how could you make"
Rick and Morty
"my son miss an entire semester of school?"
Rick and Morty
"I mean, it's not like he's a hot girl."
Rick and Morty
"He can't just bail on his life and set up shop in someone else's."
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"What are what are you, nuts?"
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"I'm a genius. I build robots for fun."
Rick and Morty
"Well, now you can build baskets and watch"
Rick and Morty
"Paul Newman movies on VHS..."
Rick and Morty
"and mentally scar the boy scouts every Christmas."
Rick and Morty
"Dad, mom, come on."
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"Rick just needed my help is all."
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"Morty, stay out of this."
Rick and Morty
"You are obviously not capable of"
Rick and Morty
"judging these situations on your own."
Rick and Morty
"What are you trying to say about Morty?"
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"That he's stupid or something?"
Rick and Morty
"Oh, don't high-road us, dad."
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"is the last child that needs to be missing classes."
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"Can can can you be a little bit more specific?"
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"Oh, for crying out he's got some kind of disability or something."
Rick and Morty
"Is that what you want us to say?"
Rick and Morty
"I do?"
Rick and Morty
"and if you want to compete in this world,"
Rick and Morty
"you got to work twice as hard."
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"Aw, geez, dad."
Rick and Morty
"Y-you know, that's a lot to drop on a kid all at once."
Rick and Morty
"Morty, t-tell your parents the square root of pi."
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"Oh, come on, Rick. You know I can't."
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"Whoa!"
Rick and Morty
"What the hell?"
Rick and Morty
"Holy crap. He's right."
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"Morty, tell your parents the first law of Thermodynamics."
Rick and Morty
""The increment in the internal energy of a system is..."
Rick and Morty
"equal to the increment of heat supplied to the system.""
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"But I told the both of you school is stupid."
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"It's not how you learn things."
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"Morty's a gifted child. He has a special mind."
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"He's gonna be doing great science stuff later in his life."
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"He's too smart for school."
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"He needs to keep hanging out and helping me."
Rick and Morty
"No, I-I understand."
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"Uh, maybe we overreacted."
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"But he has to keep going to school."
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"Okay, Jerry."
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"You drive a hard bargain, but what am I supposed to do?"
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"Say no?"
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"You you really wear the pants around here."
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"I just want you to know,"
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"between us, from now on, it's gonna be"
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"No idea what you're talking about."
Rick and Morty
"Okay."
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"This is good, though. This can work."
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"I think we can be a family."
Rick and Morty
"Full disclosure, Morty it's not."
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"Temporary superintelligence is just a side effect of the mega"
Rick and Morty
"seeds dissolving in your rectal cavity."
Rick and Morty
"Aw, man."
Rick and Morty
"Yeah, and once those seeds wear off,"
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"and you're also gonna lose a significant amount of"
Rick and Morty
"brain functionality for 72 hours, Morty."
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"I'm sorry, Morty. It's a bummer."
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"In reality, you're as dumb as they come."
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"And I needed those seeds real bad, and I had to give them up"
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"just to get your parents off my back,"
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"so now we're gonna have to go get more."
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"And then we're gonna go on even more adventures after that, Morty."
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"And you're gonna keep your mouth shut about it, Morty,"
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"what's important, and they'll tear us apart, Morty."
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"But if you stick with me, I'm gonna accomplish great things, Morty,"
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"and together, we're gonna run around, Morty."
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"It's just Rick and Morty. Rick and Morty and their adventures, Morty."
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"Rick and Morty forever and forever."
Rick and Morty
"100 years, Rick and Morty's things."
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"All day long, forever."
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"Over and over, rickandmortyadventures.com."
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"www.rickandmortyadventures."
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"Every minute, rickandmorty.com."
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"- Is this the surprise? - Morty, I had to..."
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"Come on, Morty. Just take it easy, Morty."
Rick and Morty
"you know, I want you to"
Rick and Morty
"trying to fool around with with Jessica or mess around with Jessica or anything."
Rick and Morty
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