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Clips from Man Seeking Woman - Traib (S01E01)

"God, I cannot believe you got a girl's number on the train!"
Man Seeking Woman
"No, it... she's not black."
Man Seeking Woman
"Oh... well, whatever."
Man Seeking Woman
"Either way, I'm proud of you, buddy."
Man Seeking Woman
"The coolest part is that"
Man Seeking Woman
"Awesome."
Man Seeking Woman
"- You know, sometimes... - You want to jizz all in 'em or something."
Man Seeking Woman
"Spectral voice: Maggie..."
Man Seeking Woman
"two-two... Come here..."
Man Seeking Woman
"two other... two other people that were in love."
Man Seeking Woman
"What about that pink razor"
Man Seeking Woman
"That Maggie-related?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Dio mio."
Man Seeking Woman
"Mike, you really didn't have to hire an exorcist, man."
Man Seeking Woman
"Maybelline."
Man Seeking Woman
"Maybe she's born with it. (Laughs)"
Man Seeking Woman
"What's he saying?"
Man Seeking Woman
"She will continue to haunt you as long as you still still love her."
Man Seeking Woman
"Aah!"
Man Seeking Woman
"(Exorcist speaks Italian)"
Man Seeking Woman
"What, pathetic?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Uh, unable to move on..."
Man Seeking Woman
"Mike: You must get rid of all of"
Man Seeking Woman
"Guess, uh... guess that's that."
Man Seeking Woman
"- (Whispering): Do... do I... Do I tip him? - Nah."
Man Seeking Woman
"(Banging sound)"
Man Seeking Woman
"It's, uh, almost everything."
Man Seeking Woman
"Please, please, please, please."
Man Seeking Woman
"Just let me keep this one thing."
Man Seeking Woman
"I mean, C-Craigslist."
Man Seeking Woman
"(Speaking Italian) Craigslist?"
Man Seeking Woman
"It's a piece of garbage. Nobody wants it, Josh!"
Man Seeking Woman
"Maggie might want it. Let me just call her."
Man Seeking Woman
"No! No, no, no! Just get rid of it, man!"
Man Seeking Woman
"I love you."
Man Seeking Woman
"(Distorted): I love you. And now you're going to..."
Man Seeking Woman
"Suck that dick..."
Man Seeking Woman
"(Mumbling)"
Man Seeking Woman
"(Exorcist chants in Latin)"
Man Seeking Woman
"I'm just happy it's over."
Man Seeking Woman
"Exorcist: No! Huh?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Okay, well, I just got a number from Laura..."
Man Seeking Woman
"Number?"
Man Seeking Woman
"He doesn't understand."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Empty balls. - Oh, my God."
Man Seeking Woman
"Mmm. That's... I will try."
Man Seeking Woman
"Exorcist: Say what is you try!"
Man Seeking Woman
"- Fire my P... - Yes?"
Man Seeking Woman
"into... into a V."
Man Seeking Woman
"(Squeaky voice): Great meeting you. I'm Josh from the train."
Man Seeking Woman
"I can't say that. That seems a bit aggressive."
Man Seeking Woman
"Ooh, shh. Yeah. Caption..."
Man Seeking Woman
"Josh, are you okay?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Cancel my 2:00."
Man Seeking Woman
"of joining me for dinner this Friday's eve?"
Man Seeking Woman
"- This Friday's Eve? - Yeah."
Man Seeking Woman
"a long-distance relationship for three years."
Man Seeking Woman
"To me, the course of action is clear."
Man Seeking Woman
"Perhaps a crying"
Man Seeking Woman
"that women enjoy texts"
Man Seeking Woman
"I've got it."
Man Seeking Woman
"It's Josh from the train."
Man Seeking Woman
"- It's good. - Josh: Yes."
Man Seeking Woman
"That's a classy problem to have."
Man Seeking Woman
"Exclamation points, in particular."
Man Seeking Woman
"Fifty?"
Man Seeking Woman
"- If you would just listen! - We only have one chance to do this right."
Man Seeking Woman
"There was a farmer from Virginia."
Man Seeking Woman
"about starting a country based on freedom."
Man Seeking Woman
"Send Laura a dick pic."
Man Seeking Woman
"I'm sorry, did you just say dick pic?"
Man Seeking Woman
"with a quarter in the frame to show its size."
Man Seeking Woman
"that's smart and funny"
Man Seeking Woman
"Another dinner?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Text, dinner, text, dinner!"
Man Seeking Woman
"The goal isn't texts and dinners!"
Man Seeking Woman
"It's sex!"
Man Seeking Woman
"Let's pull down our pants,"
Man Seeking Woman
"take out our dick,"
Man Seeking Woman
"There's only one way to find out."
Man Seeking Woman
"She's gonna think we're crazy."
Man Seeking Woman
"Josh: Oh, my God. Okay, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete."
Man Seeking Woman
"It's Josh..."
Man Seeking Woman
"- May God forgive us. - Josh: Sending."
Man Seeking Woman
"Come on!"
Man Seeking Woman
"Oh. Come on!"
Man Seeking Woman
"The text went through."
Man Seeking Woman
"There's just no way to know."
Man Seeking Woman
"She hated the text... she's never gonna respond."
Man Seeking Woman
"(Screaming)"
Man Seeking Woman
"Man: Sir?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Look!"
Man Seeking Woman
"Oh, okay."
Man Seeking Woman
"Well, we did it."
Man Seeking Woman
"We did it."
Man Seeking Woman
"Yeah. Um..."
Man Seeking Woman
"It's definitely... Oh, y-y-yeah."
Man Seeking Woman
"Yes, th-that's a romantic comedy."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Y-y-y-yeah, yeah. - Yeah."
Man Seeking Woman
"J-Jerry Maguire."
Man Seeking Woman
"Is it, is it... H-how is it?"
Man Seeking Woman
"- I feel bad, do you want...? - No, n-n-no."
Man Seeking Woman
"I-I'll just... I can just watch you eat."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Oh, you first. - No, no, you-you go first."
Man Seeking Woman
"Yeah."
Man Seeking Woman
"I... allow me."
Man Seeking Woman
"Uh, sh-she doesn't come."
Man Seeking Woman
"I have high hopes that this was going to happen."
Man Seeking Woman
"Yeah, yeah."
Man Seeking Woman
"(Music begins)"
Man Seeking Woman
"So if you guys just want to pack it up, that's..."
Man Seeking Woman
"But you listen to me."
Man Seeking Woman
"And she will deserve... your love."
Man Seeking Woman
"I-I appreciate... I needed to hear that."
Man Seeking Woman
"And one more thing."
Man Seeking Woman
"Is a number two."
Man Seeking Woman
"and he put too much."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Oh, my God. - I did not see it."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Like, four big bites. - Oh, God."
Man Seeking Woman
"And now feels like a big storm in my tummy"
Man Seeking Woman
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