Loading...
You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.

Clips from Farzar - Save the Reaper Demons (S01E01)

"Their intelligence surpasses dogs, Fichael,"
Farzar
"and even that chicken that picks the sports teams."
Farzar
"They are built to kill, and have razor-sharp claws and acid blood."
Farzar
"Basically, super fucking scary. I mean, not to me, but--"
Farzar
"Howdy, folks!"
Farzar
"[screams]"
Farzar
"I'm Reapey the Reaper Demon! [chuckles]"
Farzar
"Blast that motherfucker!"
Farzar
"Dad, that's not a reaper demon. It's our mascot."
Farzar
"I know."
Farzar
"Let's get inside already. My trigger finger is getting horny."
Farzar
"Welcome to the Reaper Demon Sanctuary, folks."
Farzar
"Entry is only $299.99 cents a ticket."
Farzar
"Sorry, gals, we charge by the head, not by the vagina."
Farzar
"Thank goodness, for Billy has many hidden vaginas."
Farzar
"See? Why you think Billy like tap dancing so much?"
Farzar
"Hi. Hello. Your outfit doesn't match."
Farzar
"Listen, my military parade is today"
Farzar
"and I can't drive my scorpion tank 'cause some asshole cop took away my license."
Farzar
"If you want a new license, you'll have to pass a driver's test."
Farzar
"Fine, whatever, but I'm taking my license photo now,"
Farzar
"because I brought this photography crew."
Farzar
"I'm happy!"
Farzar
"I'm coy. I'm a tiger."
Farzar
"Now I want a fall look."
Farzar
"Drop those fake leaves on me and give me a tasseled plaid scarf."
Farzar
"You! Find my kimono. I want to be a geisha with a dark secret."
Farzar
"I can't believe you talked me into the gold member VIP pass."
Farzar
"But at least I got this."
Farzar
"[squeaking]"
Farzar
"Can Billy stomp on that later, please?"
Farzar
"The reaper demon enclosure is right this way."
Farzar
"Whoa, that's weird."
Farzar
"[suspenseful music plays]"
Farzar
"Well, this just got fun."
Farzar
"Oh, shit. This is bad."
Farzar
"-I know, it must have been space pirates! -The reaper demon did this!"
Farzar
"There's no such thing as space pirates, you idiot!"
Farzar
"What? How could you lie to me all those years?"
Farzar
"Uh, space pirates made me."
Farzar
"Oh, okay. Well, I'm gonna give that reaper demon a stern talking-to!"
Farzar
"Stern talking-to? We'll be lucky if it doesn't kill us all!"
Farzar
"That reaper demon could be anywhere."
Farzar
"Sure could!"
Farzar
"[screams]"
Farzar
"I'm getting the hell out."
Farzar
"You can't get out that way. You have to exit through the gift shop."
Farzar
"Where's the goddamn gift shop?"
Farzar
"Would you like a map, sir? They're free for platinum members."
Farzar
"Ooh, you're only a gold."
Farzar
"-Well, would you like to upgrade? -What are the blackout dates? Oh!"
Farzar
"What am I saying? Just give me the damn map!"
Farzar
"The gift shop is conveniently located"
Farzar
"all the way on the other side of the sanctuary?!"
Farzar
"We're all gonna die!"
Farzar
"Relax. We can't die. We're all backed up to the cloud, right?"
Farzar
"Oh, that's just me? [laughs]"
Farzar
"I'm gonna enjoy watching this shit!"
Farzar
"Enough talk. Everybody gear up."
Farzar
"[groaning]"
Farzar
"Billy can't even hold guns!"
Farzar
"Billy start to think Mr. Barry not do very good job when he make Billy."
Farzar
"Wow, someone's having their foot period."
Farzar
"I brought a secret weapon."
Farzar
"Meet Squiggles."
Farzar
"There is nothing more dangerous than a 4'11" redheaded man."
Farzar
"Life fed him a turd sandwich, and he's pissed off about it."
Farzar
"Look at him. He needs two hands to eat a goddamn apple."
Farzar
"You think he's pissed now? [chuckles]"
Farzar
"Watch this!"
Farzar
"He wears a child's medium, and he hates that I told you that!"
Farzar
"Ah."
Farzar
"You look like the type of guy who would take a bribe."
Farzar
"I'm in a hurry, so go ahead and pass me now and I'll make it worth your while."
Farzar
"Did you just put a pancake into my pocket?"
Farzar
"Yeah, and there's more where that came from."
Farzar
"Oh, look, it's my little friend, Jimmy Dean."
Farzar
"I don't take bribes."
Farzar
"Are we sure about that?"
Farzar
"Let's just get the driving test started. Put your hands at ten and two."
Farzar
"Oh, I guess you do take bribes."
Farzar
"Wait! What are you doing?"
Farzar
"Putting my hands at ten and two."
Farzar
"Your ten-incher and your two clankers."
Farzar
"From what I'm feeling, ten inches is a little off. More like 12."
Farzar
"Mm. Congrats."
Farzar
"Ten and two on the wheel of the vehicle! Now use your left turn signal."
Farzar
"Where the hell is that? Well, it's gotta be one of these buttons."
Farzar
"[mysterious music plays]"
Farzar
"[beeping]"
Farzar
"[dance music playing]"
Farzar
"Holy shit, this thing has time travel?!"
Farzar
"Hey, Clitaris, I found your wife's family."
Farzar
"[laughs]"
Farzar
"Well, you would get it if you were here."
Farzar
"[Renzo] The shortest path to the gift shop"
Farzar
"is through the Little Reaper Romper Rec Room,"
Farzar
"then past the Raging River Rapid Reaper Roller Coaster,"
Farzar
"and left at Granny Reaper's Old-Fashioned Funnel Cake Kiosk."
Farzar
"We're not leaving until we hunt this thing down."
Farzar
"We ain't hunting shit. We're getting the hell out of this deathtrap."
Farzar
"I kind of like it here."
Farzar
"[beeping]"
Farzar
"I guess we're doing it my way."
Farzar
"[beeping]"
Farzar
"Man, this is getting good. I hope he eats that fat, gap-toothed fucker first."
Farzar
"Hey!"
Farzar
"Shh! Don't ruin the show, you fat, gap-toothed fucker!"
Farzar
"[beeping speed increases]"
Farzar
"[all scream]"
Farzar
"Damn it. If we're gonna die, I have a confession to make."
Farzar
"I wear women's deodorant."
Farzar
"Oh, I thought this would start"
Farzar
"a string of confessions of your most embarrassing secrets."
Farzar
"No one else wants to chime in?"
Farzar
"Real cool, guys."
Farzar
"Real fucking cool."
Farzar
"-Yeah, I'd like to make a complaint. -I am so sorry about this, sir."
Farzar
"I'd like to offer you an open, half-eaten box of Reapees Pieces on the house."
Farzar
"That's more like it. They're my favorite."
Farzar
Show more clips