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Clips from The Big Bang Theory - The Irish Pub Formulation (S04E04)

"So, what brings you back to L. A?"
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"Given that when we met her, she was finishing law school..."
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"What...? Dude, that's my sister you're talking about."
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"Cobbler. I'm still laughing."
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"Yeah, it's good to see you too."
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"Okay."
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"...and other rolling stock from the 1880s to the 1930s."
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"So, what are we talking about?"
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"Did you make it clear it's two different train cars turned into hot dog stands?"
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"Okay, so, what's new with you guys?"
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"Happy?"
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"Not particularly."
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"Go north."
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"Okay, fasten your seat belts."
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"...it's as if it's actually happening to me."
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"...Sheldon's still up."
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"Oh, my, this is one tough troll."
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"Can't you get rid of him?"
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"...so I can carry the mud past the dragon."
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"- Well, then bed, mister. - Five more minutes."
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"No, it doesn't matter. We'll be at work."
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"I can turn the axe around and use the handle to reach it."
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"Let's see..."
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"So, uh, you stopped at the stream and you turned north three times?"
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"- Yes. - You're right, you're lost. Good luck."
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"...doesn't mean I want to have a serious relationship."
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"And besides, I could never bring a white boy home to my parents."
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"I'm not that white."
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"Ha, ha, you're funny. Ha-ha-ha."
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"- What? - I heard a woman laughing."
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"Do you prefer ointment or cream?"
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"There are no heroes when it comes to dermatitis."
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"Hurry. Hurry, hurry."
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"But they might ask me something else."
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"Like, "Has Leonard betrayed any of his friends recently?""
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"- What are you talking about? - April 12, 2005."
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"Bob's Big Boy, Toluca Lake."
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"Raj had just introduced us to Priya for the first time..."
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"...that neither of you would attempt to woo her."
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"You?"
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"Alfred knows that Barbara Gordon is Batgirl."
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"Ta-da!"
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"You couldn't have spent last night with Priya..."
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"Sincerely, Maggie McGarry.""
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"And if anyone were to actually call that number, they will hear this:"
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"Look, Sheldon. Ugh, I don't need an alibi."
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"And with that, I will re-zip my lip."
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"Really? Heh, you? Where'd...? Where'd you go?"
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"Sure, you can. You're doing fine. It's very believable."
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"...that foreigners give presents to Americans on Thanksgiving."
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"Hey, I didn't see you giving back your Snoopy Sno-Cone maker."
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"...and mixing them into Leonard's food?"
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"You put moths in my food?"
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"For science."
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"...to pick food from my teeth and massage my gums."
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"Okay, l... I think it's safe to say..."
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"Yes."
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"- Problem? - This is the worst cobbler I've eaten."
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"It tastes like it's made of actual ground-up shoe maker."
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"Amusing. A play on the two meanings of cobbler."
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"Hey, guys. My baby sister Priya."
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"Excuse me, I object."
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"You propose a guessing game, yet you don't give me time to guess."
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"Oh, Sheldon, you haven't changed a bit, have you?"
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"Why would I change?"
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"The hope has been that you'd eventually bend to public opinion."
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"I have a layover on my way to Toronto."
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"Priya is a lead attorney for the biggest car company in India."
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"...and planning an internship at a large Indian car company..."
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"...it's actually extremely plausible."
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"And your poll numbers just keep dropping."
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"I want to catch up with all of you, but first I really must visit the loo."
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"Ah, I'm going too. I'll show you where it is."
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"This goes without saying, but I'm gonna anyway."
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"Hands off my sister."
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"Why would I touch her? She's covered with airplane germs."
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"I am so not talking to you, I'm talking to him."
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"Hey, heh, I've got a girlfriend now."
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"Oh, please. My sister is much hotter than your girlfriend, and you know it."
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"Let's agree they're both hot."
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"Okay, forget who's hotter. The first time Priya came to L. A..."
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"...Leonard and I made a pact out of respect to our friendship and to you..."
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"...that neither of us would hit on her."
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"Did you pinkie swear?"
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"Yes."
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"Okay, then."
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"It's really nice to see you again, Leonard."
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"- Here you go. - Thanks."
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"Whoa, whoa, whoa."
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"You got any special plans with your sister?"
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"Oh, not really. Just hang out."
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"I always tell people if you have only one day in Los Angeles..."
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"...make it a train day."
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""Train day"?"
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"The fun starts with brunch at Carney's in Studio City..."
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"...a hot dog stand in a converted railroad dining car."
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"Next stop, Travel Town..."
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"...an outdoor museum featuring 43 railroad engines, cars..."
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"Then finally, we're off to the glitz and glamour of Hollywood..."
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"...for dinner at, that's right, the Hollywood Carney's..."
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"...a hot dog stand in a different converted railroad dining car."
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"I don't think we're gonna do that."
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"Well, then apparently you hate fun."
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"Hmm? Priya's not back yet? Well, I guess that's not unusual."
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"Women, men, the whole sitting-standing deal."
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"Uh, my plans with Priya."
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"He rejected train day."
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"I guess he just hates fun."
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"That's what I said."
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"- I have a girlfriend now. - Hey. Good for you."
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"I just wanna put it out there..."
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"...in case I inadvertently squirt any pheromones in your direction."
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"So, uh, what are your plans while you're here?"
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"I don't know, I just have the one day."
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"Do you like trains?"
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"You might as well just wait at the airport for your flight."
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""You are in a forest."
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"There is quicksand to the west, a path leads to the east.""
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"Go east."
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""An iron gate blocks your way.""
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