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Clips from The Simpsons - My Fare Lady (S26E26)

"Man, Moe's barely got two nickels to rub together."
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"Moe's biggest Saturday night ever."
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"How does Moe make money if ladies drink free?"
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"That's the beauty part."
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"This place is about to be filled with guys buying beers,"
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"hoping to meet ladies."
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"what the beauty part of it was."
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"So they pull out my gall bladder, zip me up."
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"tapped my understudy and said, "Not tonight, honey.""
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"And here's the song I killed 'em with."
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"♪ The whole world is crazy ♪"
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"♪ Who's this Patrick Swayze? ♪"
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"She changed the lyrics!"
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"Then came the bombs:"
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"Tobacco Valley,"
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"What Color Is Your Tambourine,"
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"and The Smell of Music-- but I'm still here."
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"And I'd like to dedicate this song"
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"to the one great love of my life,"
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"the man who was my third and fifth husband-- but..."
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"you never know what the future holds."
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"We got the Cheery Red Tomatoes,"
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"a bachelorette party..."
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"Ooh! Lady Duff!"
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"Oh, yeah!"
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"There's no guys!"
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"We haven't made any money."
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"Not yet, but at least we're hearing"
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"some interesting conversation"
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"from those two book clubs."
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"Well, we thought The Heaven Lover's Club"
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"was rich and spiritual."
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"We thought it was maybe a little slow."
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"Oh, well, maybe I can liven it up for ya!"
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"Uh, okay, stop here, please."
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"So this is the charming tavern you've been telling me about."
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"Yep, nice and cozy and..."
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"My crap hole!"
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"My precious crap hole!"
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"Anyone tries to stop me,"
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"and you'll see her lovely bones all over the floor!"
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"This is nuts."
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"Tell me you still work, Love Tester."
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"Oh, I'm ruined!"
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"Sorry, Moe."
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"but only after they've bounced at the bottom."
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"♪ 'Cause I'm the brassiest piece of sass ♪"
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"♪ In this whole... damn... town! ♪"
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"Hyah!"
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"You guys cost me my chance with a woman of a certain age!"
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"Hey, come on, all is not lost."
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"This coaster's fine."
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"You are not my friends."
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"To me, you're just mouths drinking beers."
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"You can't mean that!"
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"We don't look at you that way."
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"All right, who rubbed my nickels?!"
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"Hey, wait a minute-- we can get you a job."
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"There's an opening at the nuclear plant,"
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"'cause of that guy that defected to North Korea."
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"Good old Dae Ho."
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"And all I had to do was let him copy some keys."
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"Moe, can you pass a background check?"
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"Um..."
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"Er, uh..."
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"Eh..."
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"Sure."
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"Well, then, you're in."
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"How far do they go back?"
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"Okay, I'm gonna apply in a week."
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"Whoa, Mom!"
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"Someone wants you to give them a ride."
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"Well, your mom has a job and my dad still doesn't?"
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"Just wait till winter comes, son."
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"There'll be driveways to salt!"
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"Long, long driveways."
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"Thanks for the lift."
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"It's nice to know I can get a ride"
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"without having to put out."
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"You're welcome."
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"You know, if you really want to get your belly button pierced,"
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"go see a professional."
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"I'm gonna have this done properly,"
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"at a kiosk in the mall."
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"I'm Shauna."
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"Welcome to Springfield Nuclear, Szyslak."
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"We'll start you off in Janitorial,"
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"but there is room for advancement."
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"Hey, I sure appreciate this, fellas."
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"What you guys did to me, then for me,"
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"I'll never forget-slash-forgive,"
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"Also... thanks a lot!"
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"What's for dinner, Mom?"
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"I-I'm-I'm sorry, but I'm not your mother."
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"Fine! There's meat loaf."
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"Mmm! What's meat loaf?"
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"Left... left, left!"
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"Left..."
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"Left, left!"
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"Flamingos turn pink from eating shrimp."
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"Cats have over a hundred vocal cords."
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"between two towers."
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"Why are you telling me all these things?"
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"Isn't this Cash Cab?"
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"Oh! It's never Cash Cab."
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"Faster!"
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"Eh, slower."
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"Disco Stu says hang a "U"!"
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"Make a Louie up here at the..."
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"Stop sign! Blood bank!"
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"...punching bags?"
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"So, for the love of God, get me to Mexico!"
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"Hey, swabbie, you've missed spots there,"
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"another one there, and... there!"
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"Every other spot is be-grimed!"
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"You're f... Sir..."
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"the NRC is here for a surprise inspection."
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"We are gonna search this place from top to bottom."
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"That's where all the problems are."
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"I'll handle this, uh..."
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