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Clips from Seinfeld - The Virgin (S04E04)

"...part of the celebration."
Seinfeld
"Yes, yes, I did, but you know, I was watching it on CNN..."
Seinfeld
"...and they covered it so well, I thought, why knock my brains out?"
Seinfeld
"You know, my boyfriend went."
Seinfeld
"- Really? - Yes, I told him all about you going..."
Seinfeld
"...and he got all excited and decided to go."
Seinfeld
"- Oh, did he like it? - I don't know. He never came back."
Seinfeld
"Anyway, we met with NBC about a month ago, and they..."
Seinfeld
"...gave us the green light to go ahead and write a pilot."
Seinfeld
"They gotta approve the story before we can write it."
Seinfeld
"Wow. What a great job. A writer."
Seinfeld
"Not a bad way to earn a buck."
Seinfeld
"Sounds great."
Seinfeld
"Well, I'll tell you, Stacy..."
Seinfeld
"Some people write symphonies. This is my gift."
Seinfeld
"- So you gonna go out with her? - I might."
Seinfeld
"- What about Susan? - What? I'm not married."
Seinfeld
"I'm not allowed to go out with somebody else?"
Seinfeld
"- Depends. - Depends on what?"
Seinfeld
"Saturday nights, do you ask her out, or is the date implied?"
Seinfeld
"- Implied. - She got anything..."
Seinfeld
"Let me ask you this:"
Seinfeld
"Is there any Tampax in your house?"
Seinfeld
"- I'll tell you what you got here. - Yeah?"
Seinfeld
"I'm looking at a guy in a semi-daily, with Tampax in his house..."
Seinfeld
"The first time I have a good answer to..."
Seinfeld
"...What do you do? and I have a girlfriend."
Seinfeld
"You don't need a girlfriend when you can answer that."
Seinfeld
"That's what you say in order to get girlfriends."
Seinfeld
"Once you can get girlfriends, you just want more girlfriends."
Seinfeld
"You're gonna make a very good father someday."
Seinfeld
"Well, it's not fair, Jerry. It's just not fair."
Seinfeld
"That's it. I'm getting out of this thing."
Seinfeld
"Break up with her. But you know what this means."
Seinfeld
"- That's all over. - What do you mean?"
Seinfeld
"Figure it out. She's one of the executives..."
Seinfeld
"You drop her, you think they're gonna pick us up?"
Seinfeld
"You know, it's a very interesting situation."
Seinfeld
"Here you have a job that could help you get girls."
Seinfeld
"But you also have a relationship."
Seinfeld
"But if you get rid of the relationship so you can get girls..."
Seinfeld
"- You see the irony? - Yeah, yeah. I see the..."
Seinfeld
"All right, what about this?"
Seinfeld
"What if I could find a way to break up with her..."
Seinfeld
"- Yeah. - Wait, wait. Hear me out."
Seinfeld
"Hear me out. Don't dismiss this. You're quick to dismiss."
Seinfeld
"She's got a big crush on David Letterman. A big crush."
Seinfeld
"She talks about him all the time."
Seinfeld
"He agrees to meet her. They go out. They fall madly in love..."
Seinfeld
"...and she dumps me for David Letterman."
Seinfeld
"- This is your plan? - No, no, I'm just thinking."
Seinfeld
"Well, let me tell you what I see."
Seinfeld
"Please. And be brutal. I have no closet sensitivity."
Seinfeld
"Because I have a very radical idea."
Seinfeld
"- Can you handle it? - Try me."
Seinfeld
"Here's what I'm proposing. We'll eliminate all this."
Seinfeld
"The hangers, the bar, the shelves, and in its place, install a series of hooks."
Seinfeld
"- Everything? - Everything."
Seinfeld
"The shirts, pants, sports jackets, pyjamas."
Seinfeld
"We can get 80 hooks on here."
Seinfeld
"You're quite mad, you know."
Seinfeld
"I'm watching The Bold and the Beautiful."
Seinfeld
"- No. - Wait, wait."
Seinfeld
"- This is not a good time. - Five minutes."
Seinfeld
"What did you give your TV to George for?"
Seinfeld
"It was destroying my brain cells."
Seinfeld
"- Well- Whoa. - Marla, Kramer."
Seinfeld
"Hello."
Seinfeld
"I'm telling George to give you your TV back."
Seinfeld
"- I don't know. - Will you tape it?"
Seinfeld
"- Kramer. - Oh, yeah."
Seinfeld
"So your boyfriend never came back from Berlin."
Seinfeld
"- Never came back. - Oh, you must have been devastated..."
Seinfeld
"- Yeah. - It's me."
Seinfeld
"Come on up."
Seinfeld
"That's Elaine. She's just a friend of mine."
Seinfeld
"I don't know what she's doing here now."
Seinfeld
"I'm sorry."
Seinfeld
"- What? - I didn't get it."
Seinfeld
"So you were saying there was this problem."
Seinfeld
"Well, he wanted me to move in with him."
Seinfeld
"- Snapple? - No, thanks."
Seinfeld
"- Yes? - Well, because-"
Seinfeld
"- Yeah? - Well, because I'm a..."
Seinfeld
"...virgin."
Seinfeld
"Sorry, I didn't know you had company."
Seinfeld
"- I wanted to return your tape. - Oh, thanks a lot. Two weeks late."
Seinfeld
"I'm sorry. I really am. I just kept forgetting."
Seinfeld
"- I should be going. - No, no, no. I'm leaving."
Seinfeld
"...at this crazy party I was at last night."
Seinfeld
"You'll appreciate this. Snapple?"
Seinfeld
"...my purse on the sofa. And my diaphragm goes flying out."
Seinfeld
"Staring at my diaphragm, you know? It's just lying there."
Seinfeld
"So this woman who sold me this hair thing..."
Seinfeld
"So I carry around my diaphragm. Who doesn't?"
Seinfeld
"You never know when you're gonna need it."
Seinfeld
"I should be going."
Seinfeld
"- So we'll talk about the hooks then. - Yes."
Seinfeld
"- What, was it something I said? - She's a virgin. She just told me."
Seinfeld
"- Well, I didn't know. - Well, it's not like spotting a toupee."
Seinfeld
"Should I say something, apologize?"
Seinfeld
"- Was I being anti-virgin? - No, no."
Seinfeld
"- I'm gonna- I'll be right back. - Don't- Elaine. Elaine."
Seinfeld
"- Yeah? - It's George."
Seinfeld
"- What are you gonna do? - I don't know."
Seinfeld
"They always remember the first time."
Seinfeld
"I don't wanna be remembered. I wanna be forgotten."
Seinfeld
"You know, sometimes those guys don't make it back."
Seinfeld
"We gotta get something. I don't wanna go..."
Seinfeld
"...on an empty stomach. Let's get Chinese."
Seinfeld
"Let me just call Kramer. See if he wants anything."
Seinfeld
"Hey. We're ordering Chinese food."
Seinfeld
"If you want anything, let me know what..."
Seinfeld
"...and I'll order it..."
Seinfeld
"...for you."
Seinfeld
"- I don't care. - All right."
Seinfeld
"Let's get a couple of dishes and share."
Seinfeld
"- I think I'm gonna get a chow fun. - What's a chow fun?"
Seinfeld
"It's a broad noodle."
Seinfeld
"- What do you mean a broad noodle? - It's a big, flat noodle."
Seinfeld
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