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Clips from Archer (2009) - Animation (S02E02)

"I'm not radical. Well, I mean not anymore."
Archer (2009)
"But back in the day..."
Archer (2009)
"PROTESTERS [CHANTING]: Fur is murder! Fur is murder! Fur is murder!"
Archer (2009)
"How's it feel to be a murderer?"
Archer (2009)
"Shall we find out?"
Archer (2009)
"- Lady, you don't scare me. - Dear, this is a.44 Magnum."
Archer (2009)
"Then how would you like a job?"
Archer (2009)
"Three weeks later I was in Tunisia, killing a different man."
Archer (2009)
"ARCHER: Heh, heh, heh. - And how and why is that funny?"
Archer (2009)
"You looked like Angela Davis had a lovechild with "Sweet" Lou Dunbar."
Archer (2009)
"- Shut up. - You. I'm trying to catch us some dinner."
Archer (2009)
"- Lf you'd brought enough food... - I wouldn't have beer."
Archer (2009)
"- Since I can't catch beer... - Or a fish."
Archer (2009)
"Yes, I can. Burt Reynolds is my spirit guide."
Archer (2009)
"- Did you say "man crush"? - I'm pretty sure it was "shut up.""
Archer (2009)
"What are your three biggest fears?"
Archer (2009)
"- Oh, come on. - Oh, here we go."
Archer (2009)
"Come here, fishy, fishy."
Archer (2009)
"[ARCHER & LANA SCREAM]"
Archer (2009)
"Oh, so now it's okay? What happened to your fragile ecosystem?"
Archer (2009)
"- Screw the damn ecosystem. Shoot! - You are such a hypocrite."
Archer (2009)
"[WATER GURGLING]"
Archer (2009)
"LANA: Oh, you are shitting me."
Archer (2009)
"Because I was bucking around like a rodeo clown in a barrel."
Archer (2009)
"- I mean, maybe. - Great, so maybe he's wounded."
Archer (2009)
"No, he's definitely wounded."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, right, I forgot he has an arrow sticking out of his head."
Archer (2009)
"Yeah, I think that's what enraged him."
Archer (2009)
"And so now all 20 enraged feet of him is swimming around out there."
Archer (2009)
"- In that inky black water. - Into which we are currently sinking."
Archer (2009)
"Yeah, it's not ideal."
Archer (2009)
"- I mean, even if we had more shells. - You only brought two shells?"
Archer (2009)
"In the gear bags."
Archer (2009)
"With your guns."
Archer (2009)
"And everything else."
Archer (2009)
"[LANA SIGHS]"
Archer (2009)
"Still got the cooler though, so..."
Archer (2009)
"Thank God for small miracles, huh?"
Archer (2009)
"Lana."
Archer (2009)
"Lana."
Archer (2009)
"- Lana! - What?"
Archer (2009)
"- I heard you. - I know."
Archer (2009)
"[CHUCKLES]"
Archer (2009)
"[BOTTLE CAP POPS]"
Archer (2009)
"- Yeah, why don't you have another one? - Well, somebody's got to."
Archer (2009)
"- Since you refuse to help... - You don't need help to get drunk."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, please, it takes more than some 3.2..."
Archer (2009)
"Wow, six-percent beer. - To get Sterling Archer drunk."
Archer (2009)
"- Six percent, really? - Yeah, so would you lay off?"
Archer (2009)
"There is a giant wounded alligator out there..."
Archer (2009)
"...not to mention a dangerous eco-terrorist."
Archer (2009)
"- Holy shit, totally forgot about him. - I didn't."
Archer (2009)
"More reason for you to get on board with my new plan."
Archer (2009)
"- Is it as idiotic as your other plan? - That's how brainstorming works, Lana."
Archer (2009)
"Which, yes, bad idea, but it got me thinking about chemical reactions."
Archer (2009)
"- Like alcohol's effect on the brain? - No, like the reaction between..."
Archer (2009)
"[BURPS]"
Archer (2009)
"...solid carbon dioxide, also known as dry ice, of which we have plenty..."
Archer (2009)
"...and a fun, sexy little molecule I like to call dihydrogen monoxide."
Archer (2009)
"- Water? - Water."
Archer (2009)
"Combine them in a sealed container and you've got yourself..."
Archer (2009)
"- I was building to that, but yes. - Well, we got plenty of water."
Archer (2009)
"No, the swamp's too dirty, it's full of..."
Archer (2009)
"...whatever alligators shit out, which I can only assume is people."
Archer (2009)
"- They don't eat people. - They eat people all the time."
Archer (2009)
"- They don't... - Sarasota County, Florida."
Archer (2009)
"Chet Willard, age 16, swimming in the Oak River Canal, killed by an 11-footer."
Archer (2009)
"Two years ago, Chatham County, Georgia..."
Archer (2009)
"...Walter Jakes, age 70, and his dog, killed by a 12-footer."
Archer (2009)
"- Three years ago, Dade County... - Archer!"
Archer (2009)
"What are your three biggest fears? Archer?"
Archer (2009)
"Alligators, by far the biggest."
Archer (2009)
"And so you've memorized every fatal alligator attack?"
Archer (2009)
"Just in the U.S., I can't find any information on attacks in China."
Archer (2009)
"They only live here and China. Two different species."
Archer (2009)
"Chinese alligators are smaller, but their bellies are fully-armored..."
Archer (2009)
"...so it kind of equals out. Can we change the subject?"
Archer (2009)
"- Okay, what's your second biggest fear? - God, will you just...?"
Archer (2009)
"It's crocodiles, okay."
Archer (2009)
"- Do crocodiles even live here? - Not "here" here, in the Everglades."
Archer (2009)
"- That's, like, a thousand miles away. - Three years ago, they caught a 9-foot croc..."
Archer (2009)
"...in the surf at Myrtle Beach, so, you know, shit happens."
Archer (2009)
"Nothing. It can happen anywhere at any time, that's why it's terrifying."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, my God. Okay."
Archer (2009)
"- Your plan include finding some? - Yes, but..."
Archer (2009)
"- But what? - You're not gonna like it."
Archer (2009)
"Do we have to distill our pee?"
Archer (2009)
"You can if you want, but I was just gonna use this."
Archer (2009)
"Wha...? There was bottled water in there the whole time?"
Archer (2009)
"Yes. Sorry, I forgot."
Archer (2009)
"You forgot. Thanks, idiot."
Archer (2009)
"What? You still would've burned your hands reaching in here."
Archer (2009)
"I hope an alligator attacks you at the exact moment you have a brain aneurysm."
Archer (2009)
"How could you even say that? That's like me saying I hope you get cancer."
Archer (2009)
"...but holy shit, Lana, I pour my heart out, and you just throw it right back in my face?"
Archer (2009)
"- Sorry. - Well, you should be."
Archer (2009)
"That's... Wait, okay, what's your biggest fear?"
Archer (2009)
"- Nope. - Come on, I told you mine."
Archer (2009)
"- I know. You lose. - I think your biggest fear is intimacy."
Archer (2009)
"When what you should be afraid of is falling in love with me again..."
Archer (2009)
"...because of my awesomeness."
Archer (2009)
"- Check this out. - How do you light it?"
Archer (2009)
"- Pressure builds until it explodes. - How long does that take?"
Archer (2009)
"Depends how much water. We're gonna need to dial it in."
Archer (2009)
"- You have no idea when that's gonna go off? - How could I?"
Archer (2009)
"[BOTTLE HISSING]"
Archer (2009)
"Oh, shit."
Archer (2009)
"- Asshole. - Did it get you?"
Archer (2009)
"- No. - Me neither. Wow. Again, small..."
Archer (2009)
"It's okay, I forgot to measure it."
Archer (2009)
"So we're both gonna need to do better."
Archer (2009)
"MALORY: Every single one."
Archer (2009)
"To hell with the tax credits."
Archer (2009)
"I want every last one of those low-flow toilets out."
Archer (2009)
"Where I better never catch you again."
Archer (2009)
"Pam, if you're dumping stuff on the street, this can go."
Archer (2009)
"PAM: What is it? - Shattered dreams."
Archer (2009)
"- Smells like rotten meat. - Also, yes."
Archer (2009)
"- I think we got this recipe figured out. - That was pretty great."
Archer (2009)
"- Duh. You shut up. - Shut up."
Archer (2009)
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