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Clips from 10-Year-Old-Tom - The Principal is Banging My Mom/Elderly Gerbil (S01E01)

"I mean, but, uh, just, uh, if you could just ease up"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"on the churros because they're $10 each."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Why would you care about $10 each?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"You're a prina-ci-pal-a."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Do you mind if I ask how many you bought?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- 30. - Oh, my! 30?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Are you kidding me? That's $300."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Yeah. - What are you doing with them?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- A couple I ate, but mostly I'm just throwing them."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Hey, knock it off!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- So 2 you ate and 28 you're throwing!?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I mean, some ratio akin to that, yeah."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, my God. - [grunts]"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Give me my credit card. Seriously."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Come and get it."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I don't want to come and get it."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Hey, you."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Stop throwing the churros, lady!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, Nelson. I like this VIP lifestyle."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- The sun is shining on us. - Taking a long lunch"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"while the rest of the chumps are in the cafeteria."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- This whole mom banging episode"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"really worked out in our favor."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, no. - What? What?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- What's this? Dakota's mom?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- How many moms is this guy banging?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- All right, we gotta stop this."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- We gotta do something."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"If he break up with your mom, our privileges are done."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- This has to end now. What do we do? Google it."
10-Year-Old-Tom
""How to stop principal from banging moms.""
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- "Stop principals from banging moms.""
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- "Principal banging multiple women.""
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- "Principal banging--" Ugh!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Nothing comes up? - We got 18 results."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Only two of them in English."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, man. Let's get out of here."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"All right. What's the plan?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- We're gonna hack his computer."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- How are we gonna do that?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Look, we just need to guess his password,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"then write a break-up email to Dakota's mom."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, I love that. - What do you think"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"a guy like him would use for a password?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I don't know, "principal" or, uh, "the principal"?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- "The principal." Nope."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Try "a principal." - "A principal." Nope."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Try "I'm the principal." - "I'm the principal." Nope."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"[door opens] - Hey, guys!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Need some help with your homework?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- No. We're trying to hack"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"a grown man's email."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"What kind of passwords do grown men use?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Try every variation of the word penis, followed by 69."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- How many variations of penis are there?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, there's a lot. Are you ready?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Dong69. - "Dong69". Nope."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Rod69. - "Rod69." Nope."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Wiener69. - "Wiener..." Nope."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Johnson69. - "Johnson..." Nope."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- How about Boner69? - "Boner69." That's it!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- All right, we're in! - Thanks, Dad."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I'm glad I could help. - Screw unlimited pencils."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"We're getting unlimited everything."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Now we just need to craft a carefully worded email."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- All right, let me write it."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I'm pretty smart, with the B-minus and all that."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, no. No, Tom."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"This is my territory. I know how adults talk."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"You see how I just talked to that adult?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- All right, you write it."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I'll chime in. - Let's go."
10-Year-Old-Tom
""Dear Dakota's mom." - Nice."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- "Pursuant to my prior obligations"--"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Pursuant. I love that. - "As per our meeting...""
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- It sounds like a principal wrote that. It's amazing."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"[whistle blows] - Come on, everybody!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Hey, Coach?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I know you got gym class going on"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"but can you clear the floor for us?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- What are you saying? - Tom and I have chosen"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"to play a game of one-on-one today."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Uh, this is a gym class."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I can't clear the floor for two kids."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, he don't know? - Yeah, he doesn't know."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, you don't know? - Talk to the card."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- What is this?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"He's giving special treatment to some kids and not others?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Hey, I mean, this is the way the world works, I was told."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- This is what Martin Luther King marched about."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Speaking of marches, Coach, get the marching band together."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"We're about to play full court one-on-one."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Full court? - Let me get your whistle."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, no, no, no, no. You don't touch my whistle."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Coach, I hate to pull rank. - Tom, my whistle will not go"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"in another man's mouth. - Give me that whistle."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- No. You're not-- What? No. No."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Hey, this is the game of the century, Coach."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"You don't want to miss this."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"[lanyard rips, whistle blows]"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- No, I can't just leave school to rent mopeds"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"and just cruise around all day."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Lady, you cannot go in there."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Hold on. I'll call you right back."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- No! I said you can't! - Yes, I am."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Don't make me forcibly restrain you."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Don't touch me like that! Gah! Oh, she's biting me!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Oh, look who it is. Principal Dickwad."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"What is this email that you sent?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I sent an email? - Don't play dumb,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"'cause guess what? I was smart and I printed it."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I meet with you to discuss a bake sale,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"and then you write back saying you can't bang me"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"since you're already banging Tom's mom?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"What is that?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I didn't write anything. What are you--"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Dating a student's parent is strictly off limits."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"It's taboo!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- No, I-- - I swear to God,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"you better fix this and you better fix it now."
10-Year-Old-Tom
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