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Clips from MacGruber - Brimstone (S01E01)

"Just answer the way you'd normally answer your phone."
MacGruber
"- Hello? - Hi, sweetie."
MacGruber
"Still stuck at work. Where are you?"
MacGruber
"- Where am I? - [stammers]"
MacGruber
"Make up something. - I'm at the park."
MacGruber
"- You're in the park? - No, no, no."
MacGruber
"- No, I'm not at the park."
MacGruber
"What made you say that?"
MacGruber
"You must've misheard me. I'll try to speak more clearly."
MacGruber
"Um, I'm on a ship. - You're on a ship?"
MacGruber
"- I'm certainly not in the car,"
MacGruber
"if that's what you're implying, mister."
MacGruber
"- Good, good."
MacGruber
"- Is everything okay?"
MacGruber
"- He's asking if everything's okay."
MacGruber
"- Oh, fuck, fuck. Oh, what do we do here?"
MacGruber
"What's our play? What's our fucking play?"
MacGruber
"- What do I say? Do I say it's good?"
MacGruber
"- Oh, got it, got it."
MacGruber
"Tell him everything's normal. - Everything's normal."
MacGruber
"Um, I'm not at the park. I'm on a ship."
MacGruber
"- Wow. - Just a normal ship."
MacGruber
"Is everything normal where you are?"
MacGruber
"- Well, actually, things are starting to heat up over here."
MacGruber
"Anyway, I wanted to apologize again about tonight."
MacGruber
"Having a child with you is"
MacGruber
"the most important thing in the world to me, honey,"
MacGruber
"and I just wanted to make sure that you knew that."
MacGruber
"- Oh, okay. Bye."
MacGruber
"- Great job, Vicki. That was the perfect call."
MacGruber
"Right, Piper?"
MacGruber
"Whoo!"
MacGruber
"[singer vocalizing]"
MacGruber
"[tense music]"
MacGruber
"* *"
MacGruber
"- Sir. - Yes, Major."
MacGruber
"- A C-130 was hijacked over the Indian Ocean"
MacGruber
"and dropped off radar."
MacGruber
"We think it's our guys. - What were they carrying?"
MacGruber
"- That's the thing,"
MacGruber
"it was just a bunch of ventilation equipment."
MacGruber
"- What the hell are they up to?"
MacGruber
"- We managed to trace a call from the cockpit"
MacGruber
"to an encrypted satellite phone."
MacGruber
"We're tracking that phone now."
MacGruber
"- Don't lose that signal,"
MacGruber
"and get a Reaper in the air pronto, Major."
MacGruber
"- Yes, sir."
MacGruber
"- Stay frosty, people."
MacGruber
"This is our only shot."
MacGruber
"[dramatic music]"
MacGruber
"* *"
MacGruber
"- What is this place? - An abandoned weapons depot."
MacGruber
"It officially doesn't exist,"
MacGruber
"but it does, and you're about to see it."
MacGruber
"[clanging]"
MacGruber
"This way."
MacGruber
"[suspenseful music]"
MacGruber
"* *"
MacGruber
"Haven't been in here for 20 years."
MacGruber
"Fingers crossed, nobody else has, either."
MacGruber
"Piper!"
MacGruber
"Trip wire."
MacGruber
"* *"
MacGruber
"That could've been very bad for all of us."
MacGruber
"Now, watch your step 'cause I booby trapped"
MacGruber
"this whole place to the fucking gills."
MacGruber
"Now, let's keep moving."
MacGruber
"Carefully."
MacGruber
"- [groans] Hey, guys."
MacGruber
"I think I got a problem."
MacGruber
"* *"
MacGruber
"- Okay, look."
MacGruber
"Stay very still, Vicki. - Okay."
MacGruber
"- I'm gonna get you out of this."
MacGruber
"All right."
MacGruber
"Look, you've already triggered it."
MacGruber
"- I know."
MacGruber
"- As long as we keep pressure on it, like so,"
MacGruber
"we'll be fine."
MacGruber
"It's all about physics. - Mm-hmm."
MacGruber
"- Well, we can't stay here forever, right?"
MacGruber
"- Yeah."
MacGruber
"- So we're gonna have to make a move."
MacGruber
"Okay, look. Vicki, look at me."
MacGruber
"Look at me!"
MacGruber
"I need you to trust me. Do you trust me?"
MacGruber
"- Yes. - Do you trust me?"
MacGruber
"- I said yes. - Good."
MacGruber
"'Cause I'm about to spring this--"
MacGruber
"- What? - Right--"
MacGruber
"- Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God."
MacGruber
"- Now! - [screams]"
MacGruber
"[sighs]"
MacGruber
"- Like I said, watch your step."
MacGruber
"- [chuckles]"
MacGruber
"Thank you for saving me."
MacGruber
"- It's what I do, and it comes naturally,"
MacGruber
"like breathing. - Oh."
MacGruber
"- Just in and out."
MacGruber
"In, out, in, out. - [moans]"
MacGruber
"- In, out. - [moans]"
MacGruber
"- In and out. In and out."
MacGruber
"- Uh, could we keep moving?"
MacGruber
"[sultry music]"
MacGruber
"- Lady's choice."
MacGruber
"- Sure, well, I guess we should keep moving."
MacGruber
"- Yeah."
MacGruber
"Here you go. - [sighs]"
MacGruber
"- There we go. All right."
MacGruber
"* *"
MacGruber
"[trip wire plinks]"
MacGruber
"[suspenseful music]"
MacGruber
"* *"
MacGruber
"Six, nine, six, nine, six, nine,"
MacGruber
"six, nine, number sign."
MacGruber
"[keypad beeps]"
MacGruber
"* *"
MacGruber
"- So MacGruber, why are we here?"
MacGruber
"- May 1, 1998, Burkina Faso."
MacGruber
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