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Clips from Family Guy - Pilling Them Softly (S14E14)

"Let me get up and greet you."
Family Guy
"There we go."
Family Guy
"How you doing?"
Family Guy
"Oh, my God, Stewie, you're totally drugged out!"
Family Guy
"You know something?"
Family Guy
"I have been thinking"
Family Guy
"about how everyone in this family, Brian, does their job."
Family Guy
"And they do a pretty good job of it."
Family Guy
"God, I'm really freaking out over this audition."
Family Guy
"What if I blow it?"
Family Guy
"Quagmire, when I agreed to come to this,"
Family Guy
"I didn't know it would require this level of emotional support."
Family Guy
"You Glenn Quagmire?"
Family Guy
"I'm Carson, the producer of the show."
Family Guy
"Peter Griffin. I should be at work."
Family Guy
"Okay, let's see what you've got."
Family Guy
"I think you're gonna like this."
Family Guy
"Cedar plank salmon with a maple glaze"
Family Guy
"and slow-roasted cherry tomatoes on a bed of mesclun greens."
Family Guy
"Hmm. Not bad."
Family Guy
"Also, the tomatoes can be eyes, and the lettuce can be hair."
Family Guy
"Look down. There's also a carrot."
Family Guy
"This is great!"
Family Guy
"Terrific food and a hilarious sidekick?"
Family Guy
"This! This is the show!"
Family Guy
"What do you mean?"
Family Guy
"I'm saying you're hired!"
Family Guy
"Just as long as your friend joins you."
Family Guy
"What do you say, Peter?"
Family Guy
"I say let's do it!"
Family Guy
"Whoops. Uh, uh."
Family Guy
"Oh, I'm... I'm sorry."
Family Guy
"What do I... what-what do I do?"
Family Guy
"I-I don't... I don't know what to do now."
Family Guy
"That was the wrong choice, Peter."
Family Guy
"Wow, Quagmire, look at you!"
Family Guy
"You're a real TV chef! I know."
Family Guy
"It might sound silly, but being a chef is something"
Family Guy
"I've always dreamed about."
Family Guy
"I always dream about my house filling up with water."
Family Guy
"That's crazy. But anyway, thanks for encouraging me, Peter."
Family Guy
"All right, places!"
Family Guy
"We're rolling in three, two, one."
Family Guy
"Welcome back to Quagmire's Kitchen."
Family Guy
"Now, this mince pie is about ready to go."
Family Guy
"Just needs a pinch of cinnamon."
Family Guy
"And while we're at it, how about we take the cinnamon challenge?"
Family Guy
"Okay, Peter, we've all seen the Internet videos."
Family Guy
"We're not doing that."
Family Guy
"I was talking about something else."
Family Guy
"I was talking about a serious cooking thing."
Family Guy
"Now, the ingredients of a mince pie are traceable"
Family Guy
"to the 13th century,"
Family Guy
"when returning European crusaders brought back"
Family Guy
"Middle Eastern recipes containing meats,"
Family Guy
"fruits and-- oh, boy-- spices."
Family Guy
"Right here, I'm using cloves."
Family Guy
"Of course, most people associate mince pie with Christmas."
Family Guy
"But I'll be honest."
Family Guy
"I'm not afraid of a summer mince pie."
Family Guy
"I remember the first time I had mince pie."
Family Guy
"Our neighbor, Mrs. Morrin,"
Family Guy
"introduced it to me one afternoon. Oh, God!"
Family Guy
"I had house-sat for her Aah!"
Family Guy
"while she was visiting her aunt in Vernon Oh, God."
Family Guy
"and she wanted to thank me."
Family Guy
"And, oh, boy, what a treat it was."
Family Guy
"You done? Yeah."
Family Guy
"All right, best two out of three, cinnamon."
Family Guy
"Still on those meds, huh?"
Family Guy
"Uh, yeah, they, uh... they help me to, um..."
Family Guy
"uh... think."
Family Guy
"Okay, time for an eyes-open nap."
Family Guy
"God, look what those pills are doing to you."
Family Guy
"Putting you on that stuff was a huge mistake."
Family Guy
"Like inviting a turtle to a cocktail party."
Family Guy
"Hey. Ask me why they call me a box turtle."
Family Guy
"See, this is how American society treats unique,"
Family Guy
"enthusiastic children."
Family Guy
"Instead of embracing their mental gifts,"
Family Guy
"their first reaction is to shoot them up"
Family Guy
"with hard-core drugs until they're mindless sheeple."
Family Guy
"All the better to send off to Kuwait"
Family Guy
"and feed the Halliburton oil machine, right?!"
Family Guy
"Bush."
Family Guy
"Yup. Takes all kinds."
Family Guy
"You know, a lot of kids at my school take ADD pills."
Family Guy
"They say if you're lazy and unmotivated,"
Family Guy
"it makes you super energized and productive."
Family Guy
"Rea... Really? Productive?"
Family Guy
"Yeah. And college kids take it all the time"
Family Guy
"so they can focus on their studies"
Family Guy
"and drinking alcohol with their butts."
Family Guy
"Focus, huh?"
Family Guy
"Okay, well, Stewie,"
Family Guy
"these babies can help the garbage disposal focus"
Family Guy
"because that's where they're going."
Family Guy
"No need to follow me,"
Family Guy
"because I just said what I was gonna do."
Family Guy
"My God, I can't stop!"
Family Guy
"The words are just pouring out of me!"
Family Guy
"I have more energy than a guy who caught a T-shirt!"
Family Guy
"My wife can wear this to sleep!"
Family Guy
"My wife can wear this to sleep!"
Family Guy
"Okay, today we're putting together duck breast medallions"
Family Guy
"with a port wine reduction."
Family Guy
"And as I'm walking you through the steps,"
Family Guy
"watch your screen for Junior Chef Peter's pop-up tips:"
Family Guy
"helpful hints and food factoids to make your meal a success."
Family Guy
"Now, you're gonna want to start"
Family Guy
"with a large, self-sealing plastic bag."
Family Guy
"And in that bag, we'll combine one large,"
Family Guy
"finely-chopped garlic clove;"
Family Guy
"one tablespoon of grated, peeled fresh ginger;"
Family Guy
"two teaspoons of five-spice powder;"
Family Guy
"a teaspoon of salt; and a half teaspoon of fresh ground pepper."
Family Guy
"Then you're gonna want to add the duck breasts,"
Family Guy
"seal the bag, and refrigerate that for at least one hour,"
Family Guy
"or up to 24 hours, if you want to prepare this ahead of time."
Family Guy
"Just make sure you remove the bag from the refrigerator"
Family Guy
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