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Clips from The Goldbergs - A Kick-Ass Risky Business Party (S03E03)

"ADULT ADAM: Back in the '80s, Tom Cruise danced,"
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"dove, and crashed his way into our hearts"
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"in the classic teen movie Risky Business."
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"He was a pantless, partying badass in tube socks."
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"But for my brother, Barry,"
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"Risky Business wasn't just a movie."
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"It was a plan for life."
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"(ROCK AND ROLL MUSIC PLAYING ON THE RADIO)"
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"(MUSIC STOPS) Oh!"
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"Dang it! Mom waxed the floor. I'm going again."
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"(INTRO PLAYS)"
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"(MUSIC STOPS) Shoes were a bad idea."
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"(INTRO PLAYS)"
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"(MUSIC STOPS) Going again."
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"(INTRO PLAYS AND MUSIC STOPS) Whoa!"
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"What did I tell you about Tom Cruising the floor, huh?"
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"It's incredibly risky."
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"Risky. That's the point. (SCOFFS) I mean it, Barry."
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"Take those sunglasses off and look me in the eye."
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"Do you want to crack your head open?"
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"No Tom Cruising. Say it."
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"(MUMBLING) No Tom Cruising."
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"Say it like someone who doesn't want brain damage."
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"No Tom Cruising."
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"ADULT ADAM: For years, all Barry wanted was to live Risky Business."
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"Hey."
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"And he finally got his shot thanks to his rebellious, bad-influence girlfriend,"
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"Lainey Lewis. (TIRES SCREECHING)"
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"Porsche. There is no substitute."
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"Dude."
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"This is super hot and awesome, but your dad's gonna kill you."
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"Actually, my dad just left for a flooring convention in Atlanta."
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"He gave me a buttload of pizza money and two rules."
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"No driving his Porsche and no parties."
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"One down, one to go."
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"Sweet Rebecca De Mornay it's happening!"
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"We're gonna throw a real, live kick-ass Risky Business party!"
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"Erica, we need a keg stat."
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"Lainey, jump in back."
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"Big Tasty's taking the wheel."
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"(GROANS) I can't move my legs."
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"I don't belong back here. Why is it so hot?"
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"Turn the vents on me. My God, please stop whining!"
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"But this was supposed to be my Risky Business moment. I'm Tom Cruise."
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"No, you're the weird guy in the movie who sits in the back."
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"The dude who played booger? That's bullcrap."
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"I'm not booger. You be booger."
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"Cramp! Leg cramp! (GRUNTS)"
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"My hamstrings are too muscular. What are you doing?"
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"I got to stretch out, okay? Just sit there like a good booger!"
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"Get your foot off the gear shift!"
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"I'm trying!"
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"(TIRES SCREECHING) (ALL SCREAMING)"
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"LAINEY: Nobody move! BARRY: I'm just gonna move a little."
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"Barry! Don't move."
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"Don't worry. I'm like a ninja. I'm just gonna..."
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"I think it's fair to say this was everyone's fault."
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"ERICA: Shut up, booger."
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"¶ I'm twisted up inside"
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"¶ But nonetheless I feel the need to say"
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"¶ I don't know the future"
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"¶ But the past keeps getting clearer every day ¶"
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"ADULT ADAM: It was September 23, 1980-something,"
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"and I was in my first official long-distance relationship"
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"with my first official girlfriend, Dana Caldwell."
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"No, you hang up."
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"No, you hang up. No, you hang up."
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"You hang up. You hang up."
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"You hang up. You hang up."
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"Someone please hang up."
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"I can't hear what Jake is saying to the fat man."
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"Back before email and Skype, the only way to stay connected was to talk on the telephone"
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"or, for extra romance, sing."
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"¶ Step by step ¶"
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"Unfortunately, my voice was in a transitional period. ¶ Left, right, left ¶"
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"¶ We all fall down ¶"
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"¶ Like toy soldiers ¶"
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"Oh, my God, that terrible sound is you?"
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"Leave the singing to the professionals!"
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"Me!"
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"Even though my voice changed, we were still as strong as ever."
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"I was thinking that Friday night"
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"we could look at Halley's Comet together."
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"Only comes around once every lifetime."
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"Aww. You're amazing."
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"So, I'll watch it from here and you'll watch it in Seattle."
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"Whoa. You're talking to Seattle?"
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"I thought Danielle lived down the street."
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"It's Dana, and I told you a million times she moved."
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"You can't call Seattle before 8:00."
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"Do you have any idea how much your girlfriend's gonna cost me?"
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"(DIAL TONE)"
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"Hey! You made me hang up first."
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"I'm sorry, Adam. I can't afford your love. It's too pricy."
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"What's that supposed to mean?"
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"It means I'm canceling our long-distance service."
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"There, it's done. Relationship over."
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"Pops, talk some sense into this heartless man."
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"You're a smart kid."
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"Find a creative way to connect with her. You know,"
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"I once dated a Filipino woman via telegram."
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"Really?"
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"Of course, Western Union had to shut us down"
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"because Mala could get very filthy in just three sentences."
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"Point is love."
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"Okay, you're useless to me."
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"ADULT ADAM: As angry as I was, it couldn't hold a candle to the rage my mom felt"
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"when she found out about the Porsche."
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"Do not be fooled by my sweater."
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"I am not flappy."
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"I'm very flangry. The good news is,"
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"Lainey, I spoke to your father."
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"I told him all about his car"
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"and all about the kick-ass Risky Business party."
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"What? How do you know about that?"
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""List of stuff to get for our kick-ass Risky Business party"
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""because Lainey's dad is in Atlanta.""
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"Idiot! Why'd you write it down?"
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"I'm a visual thinker. Hush up!"
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"The good news is, Lainey,"
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