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Clips from Lucifer - The Would-Be Prince of Darkness (S01E01)

"who had contact with her last night?"
Lucifer
"Um, no, uh, no, but they asked me to get the... the guest list."
Lucifer
"(quietly): Oh, geez."
Lucifer
"250 guests."
Lucifer
"You know what that means."
Lucifer
"Great party."
Lucifer
"250 suspects."
Lucifer
"Oh. Uh, I'd be careful with that thing"
Lucifer
"in the guest bedroom."
Lucifer
"There's a good chance you'll go blind."
Lucifer
"Unspeakable acts."
Lucifer
"Yes, we got a little carried away. (chuckles)"
Lucifer
"Stop interfering."
Lucifer
"I'm helping."
Lucifer
"You forget that my expertise"
Lucifer
"is finding the right people to punish, Detective."
Lucifer
"It's what I do."
Lucifer
"Or, uh, did, at least."
Lucifer
"You want to do something?"
Lucifer
"Then help account for everyone who was at the party."
Lucifer
"- Oh. - Coroner puts the time of death"
Lucifer
"between 1:00 and 3:00 a.m."
Lucifer
"Actually, is there someone"
Lucifer
"who can vouch for your whereabouts at the time?"
Lucifer
"Several someones, in fact."
Lucifer
"Yes."
Lucifer
"Get them to tell you every little detail"
Lucifer
"just to make sure that I'm not lying."
Lucifer
"I'll have someone else handle that."
Lucifer
"So... a bona fide killer on the loose that needs to be punished."
Lucifer
"Time to punch in."
Lucifer
"There she is."
Lucifer
"Do you know anyone here?"
Lucifer
"No. Sorry."
Lucifer
"I mean, people just show up to these things."
Lucifer
"Did anyone look suspicious?"
Lucifer
"(scoffs) Where do we start, Detective?"
Lucifer
"I mean, look at those big strong hands."
Lucifer
"Perfect for squeezing the life out of someone."
Lucifer
"Oh, ginger lad."
Lucifer
"Soulless bastards."
Lucifer
"Give even me the creeps."
Lucifer
"I..."
Lucifer
"You need to sit with the witnesses."
Lucifer
"LUCIFER: Haven't I proven myself"
Lucifer
"extremely useful at detectiving?"
Lucifer
"Actually, no, I don't need your help color-commentating."
Lucifer
"I need facts and hard evidence."
Lucifer
"So unless you can help me with either, stay."
Lucifer
"But I don't want to be stuck out here with these miscreants."
Lucifer
"These are your people."
Lucifer
"Detective!"
Lucifer
"(huffs)"
Lucifer
"(woman retching, vomiting)"
Lucifer
"This won't do at all."
Lucifer
"Hey."
Lucifer
"I heard all hands on deck."
Lucifer
"I came as quick as I could."
Lucifer
"Yeah, and on time."
Lucifer
"Look, Chloe, I'm sorry about earlier, okay?"
Lucifer
"I got held up at an arrest in Hollywood."
Lucifer
"I couldn't get away."
Lucifer
"I get it, Dan."
Lucifer
"Save the apologies for Trixie."
Lucifer
"This is work, and right now,"
Lucifer
"we have a victim with no fingerprints on file."
Lucifer
"These all the unclaimed items from the party?"
Lucifer
"Yeah, I checked everything."
Lucifer
"Unfortunately, no I.D. that matches our victim."
Lucifer
"So, what are you thinking?"
Lucifer
"Well, I'm thinking our victim"
Lucifer
"wore a cute red dress."
Lucifer
"There's no way she'd have that pink clutch."
Lucifer
"She was out to have fun,"
Lucifer
"so that nixes anything big and bulky, like a tote."
Lucifer
"I don't know."
Lucifer
"I'm looking for something small,"
Lucifer
"a little sexy..."
Lucifer
"classy."
Lucifer
"Something like this."
Lucifer
"Wait a minute, I-I thought you said"
Lucifer
"all this stuff was searched already for I.D."
Lucifer
"I'm not looking for an I.D."
Lucifer
"I'm looking for a car."
Lucifer
"(car alarm chirps)"
Lucifer
"Ali Thornton, 23, from Boise, Idaho."
Lucifer
"Her info matches the registration"
Lucifer
"we found in the glove box."
Lucifer
"Hmm."
Lucifer
"She was a long way from home."
Lucifer
"What were you doing here, Ali?"
Lucifer
"I'll see what I can find on her."
Lucifer
"Detectives,"
Lucifer
"found something in the master bedroom."
Lucifer
"Found this here in the bed."
Lucifer
"And it matches the missing fingernail of the victim."
Lucifer
"Isn't this Ty's bedroom?"
Lucifer
"Yeah, looks like they did a lot more than talk."
Lucifer
"(woman moaning passionately nearby)"
Lucifer
"(Lucifer moans with pleasure, as woman's moans continue)"
Lucifer
"What the hell are you doing?"
Lucifer
"Well, since you banished me outside with the lepers,"
Lucifer
"I decided to make myself useful."
Lucifer
"You call watching porn on your phone useful?"
Lucifer
"This isn't my phone, Detective."
Lucifer
"I think it's our recently departed's."
Lucifer
"Where did you get this?"
Lucifer
"Just heard a ringy-ding and followed the noise."
Lucifer
"- Now, is delete the little rubbish bin--? - No."
Lucifer
"You can't delete anything on this phone."
Lucifer
"But it shows Ty and Ali having sex."
Lucifer
"It's very distracting."
Lucifer
"(quietly): Wait."
Lucifer
"Ooh, you've reached the money shot?"
Lucifer
"Are you taping this?"
Lucifer
"TY: I don't know."
Lucifer
"Over there, we had a drink."
Lucifer
"And I didn't know the girl that well."
Lucifer
"Where are you going?"
Lucifer
"Detective!"
Lucifer
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