Loading...
You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.

Clips from The Tender Bar

"I don't want to be a junior."
The Tender Bar
"I don't want to have the same name."
The Tender Bar
"(Mom sniffles)"
The Tender Bar
"You can have any name you want."
The Tender Bar
"("Magic" by Pilot playing)"
The Tender Bar
"Who was the guy pitched a no-hitter on acid?"
The Tender Bar
"-- Dock Ellis. -- You can take acid,"
The Tender Bar
"you can take fucking Drano. You know what I'm saying?"
The Tender Bar
"But you commit. You make a decision."
The Tender Bar
"You shit or wind your watch."
The Tender Bar
"You fucking call it a day or run for president, and that's it."
The Tender Bar
"What do you need me to do?"
The Tender Bar
"-(sighs) Mom can't go to something. -Oh."
The Tender Bar
"I mean, what can't she go to?"
The Tender Bar
"Where we going?"
The Tender Bar
"Sorry to make you wait."
The Tender Bar
"(sighs) How can I help?"
The Tender Bar
"Uh, well, I'm not sure."
The Tender Bar
"Uh, someone said he was having, uh, tantrums."
The Tender Bar
"Maybe you said that."
The Tender Bar
"His mother's a secretary. She's busy. She's not here, so I came."
The Tender Bar
"Maybe you can tell me what this is all about."
The Tender Bar
"The boy won't tell me what his name stands for."
The Tender Bar
"Doesn't stand for anything. His name is JR."
The Tender Bar
"Deal with it."
The Tender Bar
"(chuckles softly)"
The Tender Bar
"Maybe this is a weird time for me to tell you that I'm not a psychologist."
The Tender Bar
"Why do you say that?"
The Tender Bar
"Well, because I'm not a psychologist"
The Tender Bar
"and I'm sitting here with somebody who actually is a psychologist"
The Tender Bar
"who maybe knows I'm not a psychologist."
The Tender Bar
"What are you, fucking inert?"
The Tender Bar
"(chuckles) All right."
The Tender Bar
"This is your thing?"
The Tender Bar
"Nothing is face value, and you're the smartest guy in the room,"
The Tender Bar
"and you sit there looking for errors in baseline perception."
The Tender Bar
"Oh, yeah. We all have our jobs."
The Tender Bar
"You have yours. Knock yourself out."
The Tender Bar
"JR-- those are his initials?"
The Tender Bar
"Or it's the contraction for "junior.""
The Tender Bar
"What fucking difference does it make?"
The Tender Bar
"Well, there's a very big difference if it is being concealed from him"
The Tender Bar
"that he's a junior because there is no senior in his life."
The Tender Bar
"That may never have occurred to him until you just"
The Tender Bar
"laid your line of bullshit on the subject to him right to his face."
The Tender Bar
"It is my belief that the uncertainty about the meaning of his name"
The Tender Bar
"and the continual questions about it have left him without identity."
The Tender Bar
"Very impressive. No identity, hence identity crisis."
The Tender Bar
"He has no identity, which causes rage."
The Tender Bar
"He has dubiety about his identity, possibly."
The Tender Bar
"How sure are you about your identity? Hmm?"
The Tender Bar
"I'm curious because you seem very interested"
The Tender Bar
"in his father and his absence,"
The Tender Bar
"and you cast it in this very negative light"
The Tender Bar
"and bring the kid in here and you're traumatizing him."
The Tender Bar
"We both know you're calling his mother up and asking her out on dates."
The Tender Bar
"Um, that's..."
The Tender Bar
"So you're willing to traumatize a little kid"
The Tender Bar
"in order to hit on his mother?"
The Tender Bar
"Uncle Charlie never had the money to go to college."
The Tender Bar
"He was self-taught."
The Tender Bar
"But that didn't mean some dime-store fifth-grade shrink could go toe to toe."
The Tender Bar
"(typewriter bell dings)"
The Tender Bar
"(clock ticking)"
The Tender Bar
"(sighs) The Family Gazette."
The Tender Bar
"This is great, JR."
The Tender Bar
"(sighs)"
The Tender Bar
"(lighter flicks)"
The Tender Bar
"Okay."
The Tender Bar
"Here it is."
The Tender Bar
"Lose the drawings. Just get rid of 'em."
The Tender Bar
"I know a lot of guys that think they're writers,"
The Tender Bar
"and you'll find in life that most of them are not."
The Tender Bar
"Here's the thing."
The Tender Bar
"You got to have "it.""
The Tender Bar
"I don't know what it is, but if you don't have it immediately..."
The Tender Bar
"...you never get it."
The Tender Bar
"And I say you got it."
The Tender Bar
"Oh. I knew it."
The Tender Bar
"Oh, I knew it! I knew it."
The Tender Bar
"There's-there's... there's something."
The Tender Bar
"Calm down. I didn't say you were good."
The Tender Bar
"I said, you know, you could be."
The Tender Bar
"Come here. Come with me."
The Tender Bar
"(door slides open)"
The Tender Bar
"Now, what you do is you read all of those."
The Tender Bar
"Now, I don't want to talk to you unless you read all those."
The Tender Bar
"I also don't want to talk to you about all those."
The Tender Bar
"So, Yale interview?"
The Tender Bar
"(chuckles) Yeah."
The Tender Bar
"Your mother must be thrilled."
The Tender Bar
"(laughs)"
The Tender Bar
"Yeah, you know, it's all she ever wanted."
The Tender Bar
"In my official capacity, I have to say, is the only thing"
The Tender Bar
"to concentrate on in this world"
The Tender Bar
"is the desire to see the face of God the Father."
The Tender Bar
"Right."
The Tender Bar
"However, the Church is on her last legs."
The Tender Bar
"Three people come to my mass."
The Tender Bar
"I had four, but Mrs. Cafferty took a fall"
The Tender Bar
"because she didn't have a good son."
The Tender Bar
"Be a good son."
The Tender Bar
"(chuckles softly)"
The Tender Bar
"That's why I'm going to the interview."
The Tender Bar
"Now, tell me, when was the last time you made a good confession?"
The Tender Bar
"("Turn Back the Hands of Time" by Tyrone Davis playing)"
The Tender Bar
"Not in my Yale essay."
The Tender Bar
"Well, you want to get in."
The Tender Bar
"(chuckles) Right."
The Tender Bar
"Hey. Whose kid is that?"
The Tender Bar
"My sister's."
The Tender Bar
"Which sister? The hot one or the crazy one?"
The Tender Bar
"What, are you fucking stupid? You want to die?"
The Tender Bar
"(laughing)"
The Tender Bar
"Hey, get that kid a drink on me."
The Tender Bar
"Oh, you're backed up on Bobo."
The Tender Bar
"You know, I got a feeling that, uh, you had a reason to come down here."
The Tender Bar
"You didn't just come down here to come here."
The Tender Bar
"Maybe you forgot."
The Tender Bar
"Grandpa needs a pack of Old Golds."
The Tender Bar
Show more clips