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Clips from The Tender Bar

"DJ (over radio): There's your Golden Earring,"
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"and they're gonna be opening for The Who for three days"
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"at Madison Square Garden, starting..."
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"(radio shuts off)"
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"(typewriter keys clacking)"
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"(typewriter bell dings)"
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"(bird cawing)"
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"Is that Uncle Charlie?"
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"I was trying to fucking help you pitch."
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"Help me pitch?"
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"This is batting practice, okay?"
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"It's not for you to help me pitch."
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"I'm worried about you."
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"(overlapping chatter)"
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"All right, shut the fuck up."
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"All right, all right, all right. Ready?"
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"Ah, this guy's got nothing."
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"You got nothing. Come on, Chaz."
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"-- All right, here we go. -- Come on, come on, Goose."
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"Come on, get it by him. Get it by him."
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"(indistinct chatter)"
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"I'll see you back at the house."
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"Ruthie's back there, too."
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"Be a full house."
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"Okay."
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"-What are you gonna do? -Come on, Chaz. Come on."
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"(chatter continues indistinctly)"
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"Come on."
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"We're going home."
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"We're going home. Again."
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"All right, here you go. Nice grip."
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"Here you go, kid."
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"-Use your glove. -(laughter)"
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"(creaking)"
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"It was 1973,"
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"and after failing to pay our rent for five months,"
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"my mom and I had to move back home to my grandpa's house."
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"(sighs)"
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"Home never meant the same thing to my mother as it did to me."
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"To her, it meant failure, the place you ended up"
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"when all the things she was counting on fell through."
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"Work, apartment, boyfriend, not always in that order."
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"But I loved it."
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"To me, Grandpa's house was a revolving door of cousins and aunts,"
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"with a full complement of laughter and tears"
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"and an occasional nervous breakdown."
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"But above all, it's where Uncle Charlie lived."
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"And when you're 11 years old, you want an Uncle Charlie."
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"Everybody needs to know the cesspool isn't taking it."
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"If you take a leak, take it outside."
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"I could use a little help in here."
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"I'm not the maid."
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"Jesus Christ!"
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"My father was a radio DJ in New York."
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"They called him The Voice."
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"He played Top 40 hits, and he'd talk about the musicians."
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"I only met him once, and I was pretty young,"
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"so when I could, I'd sneak away and listen to him on the radio."
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"I had to sneak, 'cause after he left us,"
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"well, let's just say Mom took a pair of scissors to every picture he was in."
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"(laughter, indistinct chatter over TV)"
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"(over radio):"
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"-(children laughing)"
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"(indistinct sportscast playing)"
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"(Mom sniffling, sobbing softly)"
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"(sighs)"
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"I like it."
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"(Mom sighs)"
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"Do you?"
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"It's people. I like to have people."
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"(sighs) Tomorrow is another day."
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"Why does Grandpa say we should all clear out?"
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"Because he's a selfish old prick who resents taking care of his family."
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"Like Dad?"
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"No, honey."
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"Grandpa resents taking care of his family."
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"Your father has never taken care of anybody at all."
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"Oh."
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"(softly): Oh."
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"("Love Will Find a Way" by Pablo Cruise playing over radio)"
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"(indistinct, overlapping chatter)"
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"(indistinct chatter continues)"
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"That's Pablo Cruise with "Love Will Find a Way"..."
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"-(radio clatters) -(broadcast cuts out)"
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"(chatter stops)"
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"Hey, now, eat your cereal."
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"Okay, two rules."
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"I'm never gonna let you win, ever."
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"You beat me, you know you beat me fair and square,"
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"but I never let you win."
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"And I'm gonna always tell you the truth."
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"I saw you in the yard playing sports."
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"You're not very good."
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"And... probably not gonna get a whole lot better,"
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"so it might be wise for you, in order to avoid tears and disappointment"
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"and, above all, delusion,"
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"you know, find some other activities that you like."
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"You know, like, uh, what do you like to do the most?"
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"I like to read."
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"I also like to read."
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"I mean, I'm good at sports, too, but..."
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"So, this thing about the radio."
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"You're gonna look for your father in the radio."
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"You think your father is in the radio."
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"He's not in the radio."
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"He's just an asshole who happens to be on the radio."
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"Don't look for your father to save you."
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"And don't play sports."
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"That's all I have to say."
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"The game is five-card stud."
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"(dog barking in distance)"
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"Mom can use some money."
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"This is The Voice at 97.1 on your dial."
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"She's really tired after work."
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"…top ten songs this week, you'll win a Q97"
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"limited-edition brass belt buckle,"
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"and you'll be registered to win $500."
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"What do you say? The top ten."
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"You can't win if you don't play."
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"Is this seat taken?"
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