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Clips from Flight of the Conchords - Evicted (S02E02)

"We're being way too loud?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- Oh, we've paid our rent. - We've paid our rent."
Flight of the Conchords
"- You gave me a check. - We gave you that check."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, but I've been collecting the checks"
Flight of the Conchords
"and I just went to the bank to deposit them"
Flight of the Conchords
"and they're in the wrong currency."
Flight of the Conchords
"- What? - They're in New Zealand dollars."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Mm-hmm. - Oh, they're probably..."
Flight of the Conchords
"- yeah, our checkbook is... - It's a New Zealand account."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, I need you to pay rent in American dollars."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Okay. - Retroactively..."
Flight of the Conchords
"Well, we can't do anything in the past."
Flight of the Conchords
"No, but you could pay me now for the mistakes of the past."
Flight of the Conchords
"Over the past two years, you've come up short"
Flight of the Conchords
"and you owe me $7,727."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah."
Flight of the Conchords
"Is that American dollars or real dollars?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- American. - That... we owe you that much?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, and for New Zealand dollars, you would owe..."
Flight of the Conchords
"...that much."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah."
Flight of the Conchords
"- $77,000. - Yeah. Yeah."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Can we give you an I.O. U? - No. No."
Flight of the Conchords
"In American dollars, not in New Zealand dollars."
Flight of the Conchords
"- I prefer the money. - The money."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Yeah. - Soon?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- Yeah. Uh-huh. - Let me handle this, Bret."
Flight of the Conchords
"We don't have any... anywhere near"
Flight of the Conchords
"that amount of money."
Flight of the Conchords
"When do you think you will have that amount of money?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- May I? - Yes."
Flight of the Conchords
"Okay, here... here it is. Umm..."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Never. - I'm going to give you a month."
Flight of the Conchords
"No."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Evicted? - Mmm."
Flight of the Conchords
"- By whose authority? - The landlord."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Why? - Just because we were paying"
Flight of the Conchords
"Okay, so he's a racist and now you're homeless."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Present. - Well, Murray, present."
Flight of the Conchords
"I think it might be time, guys."
Flight of the Conchords
"- What for? - To stage your lives"
Flight of the Conchords
"as an off-Broadway musical."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Oh. - Oh, yeah, of course."
Flight of the Conchords
"Is there a more practical solution?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Look at this."
Flight of the Conchords
"I've been writing this for two years..."
Flight of the Conchords
"secretly, all right?"
Flight of the Conchords
"It's a musical, like "Mamma Mia"..."
Flight of the Conchords
"- "Mamma Mia"? ...but this is your musical."
Flight of the Conchords
"All right? It's your story."
Flight of the Conchords
"- A musical? - Yeah, about your lives."
Flight of the Conchords
"We haven't got anywhere to live, and you're saying"
Flight of the Conchords
"we should put on... maybe we should put on a musical?"
Flight of the Conchords
"I think so. The opportunity has arisen"
Flight of the Conchords
"It's about a couple of deadbeat guys from New Zealand"
Flight of the Conchords
"- who have got nothing going on. - Wait, who are those characters?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Jemaine and Bret. It's... it's based on you,"
Flight of the Conchords
"- and you come to America with a dream. - How insulting."
Flight of the Conchords
"- It says "two hopeless losers." - Yup, that's you."
Flight of the Conchords
"and you start at the bottom, but with a bit of hard work"
Flight of the Conchords
"and the help of a savvy manager who shows you the light..."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Who's that? - Oh, that's a character"
Flight of the Conchords
"who's based on me, loosely based on me..."
Flight of the Conchords
"you make it to the top."
Flight of the Conchords
"Our story is the story of two guys"
Flight of the Conchords
"who start at the bottom and with a lot of hard work"
Flight of the Conchords
"continue along the bottom"
Flight of the Conchords
"and finally end up at the bottom."
Flight of the Conchords
"Oh yeah, that's an intriguing scenario."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Yeah, it's a rags- to-rags story. - Yeah, imagine it."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, did you see the one about the guys who started at the bottom,"
Flight of the Conchords
"stayed at the bottom and at the end they were still at the bottom?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- Oh. Yes, that's our lives. - So inspirational."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Who'd go and see that? - L... I think I'd see that."
Flight of the Conchords
"- I would go see that. - It's more realistic."
Flight of the Conchords
"You're thinking that you're at the end of your tether now,"
Flight of the Conchords
"but what if this is just the beginning of your story?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Then it's a slow start, isn't it?"
Flight of the Conchords
"This is good stuff, okay?"
Flight of the Conchords
"I couldn't put it down."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Take a look at the end. - What happens at the end?"
Flight of the Conchords
"At the end you end up staging yourselves a big Broadway musical"
Flight of the Conchords
"and it's a great success."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, but that doesn't mean it's gonna happen like that."
Flight of the Conchords
"Well, everything so far has turned out, Bret, okay?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, but that's because it's based on truth... this is our story..."
Flight of the Conchords
"and then you just made up the end with a musical."
Flight of the Conchords
"Some of it's in the future. But look at this scene."
Flight of the Conchords
"Look, you come into my office"
Flight of the Conchords
"and I tell you about the musical I've written. It's just like now."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Really? - Yeah."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Oh yeah, you say "Really?" - There you go."
Flight of the Conchords
"You've got "Really?" here. I knew you'd say that."
Flight of the Conchords
"- The thing is... - Oh, we're supposed to be singing."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, when I tell you the news, and here you love it"
Flight of the Conchords
"- That's not gonna happen. - Trust me, guys,"
Flight of the Conchords
"this is gonna be great. This is our last resort."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, sure,"
Flight of the Conchords
"but I've only got one bed"
Flight of the Conchords
"and I grope people in my sleep."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's a condition."
Flight of the Conchords
"I had to leave the New Zealand Army."
Flight of the Conchords
"We'll just stay on the co... on the floor."
Flight of the Conchords
"I'll probably find you there."
Flight of the Conchords
"I tend to... I really reach out."
Flight of the Conchords
"Mmm, never mind."
Flight of the Conchords
"- No? - We'll find somewhere."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, don't worry about it."
Flight of the Conchords
"That's actually better for the story, if you're homeless."
Flight of the Conchords
""Two homeless deadbeats go out onto the streets.""
Flight of the Conchords
"Wow, this is great stuff."
Flight of the Conchords
"I'm sorry I can't help you guys out,"
Flight of the Conchords
"but I think the other guy living in my apartment is a dangerous drug dealer."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Your dad? - Yeah."
Flight of the Conchords
"I can't have you at my apartment. What if some crazy shit goes down?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah."
Flight of the Conchords
"And I'm not allowed to have friends over on weeknights,"
Flight of the Conchords
"- but this place is good. - Hey, guys."
Flight of the Conchords
"Hi, we'd like to inquire about a room."
Flight of the Conchords
"We only have one room that you can get for $51..."
Flight of the Conchords
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