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Clips from The Simpsons - Homer vs. the 18th Amendment (S08E08)

"So!"
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"- ## [Ends] - Oh, geez. This looks bad."
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"Better turn on the old Wiggum charm."
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"[Clearing Throat]"
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"[Chuckling]"
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"[Gasps] Pervert!"
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"Oh, boy. That sounded bad."
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"We demand you bring in a police chief who will enforce the prohibition law."
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"Demand? Who are you to demand anything? I run this town!"
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"You're just a bunch of low-income nobodies!"
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"Uh, election in November. Election in November."
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"What? Again? This stupid country."
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"[Narrator] With rum-running hoodlums in the catbird seat..."
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"Springfield sent for the one man who could clean up the town and shoot the gangsters-"
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"Rex Banner."
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"[Goofy Laugh]"
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"Whoa! Whoa! Ow! Hey, I was watching that. And I was sittin' there."
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"Rex Banner. I'm running this department now."
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"Wiggum, you're out, suspended indefinitely!"
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"Huh?"
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"Tuck in that shirt! Get those shoes shined!"
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"Take that badge out of your mouth! You're police officers."
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"Well, what are you waiting for, somebody to kiss you good-bye?"
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"Well? No, no, no. I guess not."
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"[Narrator] Wasting no time, Rex Banner tore into the bootleggers..."
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"like a chippie tearing into a lobster."
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"[Tires Screeching]"
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"[Rapid Gunfire]"
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"How do you know you don't like bribes if you've never taken one?"
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"- Here. - Say, this is nice."
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"- No! No bribes! - Okay, you win."
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"- From now on, we'll stick to smuggling heroin. - See that you do!"
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"At first, I thought prohibition was a good thing."
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"People were drinking more and having a lot more fun."
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"But without beer, prohibition doesn't work."
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"Hey, hi. Can I arrest any of you people for anything?"
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"- No. - Aw, geez. I don't have anything to do anymore."
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"With Banner around, alcohol and crime are history in this town..."
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"and so am I."
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"Now, don't say that! Alcohol is a way of life."
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"Alcohol is my way of life, and I aim to keep it."
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"Sounds like you have a plan."
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"Maybe I do, Chief. Maybe I do."
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"- Come on, boy. Think of a plan. - I'm tryin', Dad!"
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"Kent Brockman at the now-closed Duff bottling plant..."
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"where a mysterious person in black keeps a solitary vigil."
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"- [Barney Belches] - I've got it!"
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"We're going out, Marge! If we don't come back, avenge our deaths!"
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"- [Marge] All right! - [Door Slams Shut]"
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"[Bart] Whoa! Bonanza!"
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"- Let's load it up before the rats regroup. - Right."
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"Now, remember, don't mention this to anyone-"
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"not to your mother, not Rex Banner, not anyone!"
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"[Both Straining]"
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"[Scoffs] Rex Banner. What a dope!"
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"Yeah. Look at him try to aim that stupid gun."
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"- [Gunshot] - [Both Scream]"
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"[Siren Wailing]"
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"Hang on, Son!"
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"- Dad, knocking over a gravestone is bad luck. - Really? I heard good."
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"What happened to you, Homer?"
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"- And what have you done to the car? - Nothin'."
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"I don't think it had broken axles before."
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"Before! Before! You're livin' in the past, Marge. Quit livin' in the past."
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"That's funny. I used to be able to go down there."
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"- [Both Straining] - Going bowling. Not back, avenge deaths."
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"not in your childish vandalism."
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"Why do you have so many bowling balls?"
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"Oh. So many wasted nights."
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"Oh! I'm not gonna lie to you, Marge."
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"- What's the matter, Chief? - Yeah. You've barely touched your Banana Kaboom."
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"- So long! - [Door Slams Shut]"
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"This isn't a very happy birthday for Rex Banner."
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"- [Car Doors Slamming Shut, Tires Screeching] - [Groans]"
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"## [Singing, Indistinct]"
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"Aw, rats. Another gutter ball."
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"Hello, fishies! [Belches]"
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"- Gee, Homer, you sure do suck tonight. - Yeah, suck like a fox!"
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"- [Yells] - Listen, rummy!"
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"[Boisterous Laughter]"
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"I'm gonna say it plain and simple. Where'd you pinch the hooch?"
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"There you go, Barn. That'll be 45 bucks."
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"- Is some blind tiger jerking suds on the side? - Yes?"
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"Forty-five bucks?"
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"Wait a minute. I forgot to make sure..."
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"This better be the best-tastin' beer in the world."
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"the coast was clear."
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"You got lucky."
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"Ah, it's probably clear. Let's go."
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"- [Gasps] - Beer!"
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"You see, boy? The real money's in bootlegging..."
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"I can explain, Marge. Please let me explain."
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"Oh, why won't you let me explain?"
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"You're the one the papers have been talking about-"
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"that mysterious Beer Baron who's been supplying Springfield with alcohol."
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"How have you been getting away with this?"
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"Well- And I can explain, remember?"
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"I fill the balls with beer that I found at the dump. And then I bowl them..."
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"and some underground pipes take them into Moe's."
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"Homer, that's very clever."
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"- Huh? - Mom?"
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"Well, it is. I've known your father since high school..."
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"and this is the cleverest thing he's ever done."
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"Besides, he's only breaking a silly, 200-year-old law."
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"It is silly, Marge. And look at all the money I'm making!"
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"- Whoo! - Mom!"
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"Prohibition may be unpopular, but it's the law, and we still have-"
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"[All] Go to your room, Lisa!"
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"## [Up-tempoJazz]"
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"[Pounding]"
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"Open up, Curly! This is a raid!"
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"A raid? Curly?"
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"Um, all right, but, uh..."
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"I don't know what you expect to find..."
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"in a simple, uh, neighborhood pet shop."
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"[Bird Squawking]"
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"Pet shop, eh? Well, I just have one question."
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"What kind of pet shop is filled with rambunctious yahoos and hot jazz music at 1:00 a. m?"
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"Um- Oh."
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"The best damn pet shop in town!"
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