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Clips from The Simpsons - Homer vs. the 18th Amendment (S08E08)

"## [Chorus Singing]"
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"[Tires Screeching]"
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"D'oh! [Screams]"
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"[Couch Whinnying]"
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"You sure look stupid in that green dress, Lise."
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"That's funny. I don't feel stupid."
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"[Chattering]"
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"Hey. Everybody's wearing green."
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"- Oh, no. - Pinch!"
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"Ow! Quit it!"
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"It's the wearin' of the green, Bart! Pinch, pinch, pinch!"
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"- No one's pinching his legs. - Pinch, pinch, pinch, pinch!"
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"Oh!"
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"It's been St. Patrick's Day for hours, and I'm still not drunk yet!"
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"Oh, it's never gonna be 9:00. Moe! Moe!"
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"Thank God you're here. We'd like to come in and drink, please."
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"- We kicked down the back door, but then there was a metal door. - Yeah, all right. Listen up."
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"This is the busiest drinking day of the year."
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"Where are the designated drivers? Beat it!"
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"I got no room for cheapskates."
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"Top of the mornin' to ye on this gray, drizzly afternoon."
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"Kent O'Brockman live on Main Street where today..."
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"everyone is a little bit Irish..."
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"except, of course, for the gays and the Italians."
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"All right, then. Move along."
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"- Nothin' to see here. - Show's over, folks."
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"- Parades just bring out so many emotions in me- - [Horn Blowing]"
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"joy, excitement, looking."
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"Mom, can I go buy one of those long, plastic horns?"
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"Oh, Bart, we've bought those before..."
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"and you always just throw them out the car window on the ride home."
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"[Sighs] I get bored with them. But that won't happen this time."
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"[Groans]"
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"Beep-beep! Comin' through! Hey, Notre Dame, move it or lose it."
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"A-oo-ga! Will the owner of the great big butt please move it out of my face."
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"- [Man] Climb it, man! All right! - Hey, Ma, I'm on TV!"
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"- Hey, where's that weather chick? - Ooh! This is some wicked party, huh?"
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"- Hey, have you seen Sully? - Get away from here!"
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"Hey! I need that pencil! Ladies and gentlemen, what you are seeing..."
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"is a total disregard for the things St. Patrick's Day stands for."
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"All this drinking, violence, destruction of property-"
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"Are these the things we think of when we think of the Irish?"
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"[Cheering, Shouting]"
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"[Bart] Hey, give me some room! Watch the elbow, Seamus!"
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"Hey, look, everybody! Free beer!"
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"Open your yaps, boyos!"
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"[Gulping]"
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"Hey, what the- Oh! [Belches]"
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"Everybody- Everybody get naked!"
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"Come on. Don't be stuck-up. It's going to be great."
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"Well, why not?"
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"This party's just getting started!"
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"Stop the celebration! That small boy is drunk!"
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"[Laughing, Hiccups]"
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"- [All Gasping] - [Voices Overlapping]"
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"[Hiccuping Continues]"
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"- Yea, Bart! - Yea!"
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"[Chattering]"
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"Look at me! I'm the prime minister of Ireland!"
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"Hey, Homer, ain't that your kid on TV?"
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"- [Groans] - [Kent Brockman On TV] But what's the solution?"
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"What are you lookin' at?"
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"Are we so bereft of ideas that we must revive..."
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"[Hiccups]"
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"the antiquated notion of prohibition?"
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"What are you looking at?"
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"Channel 6 says yes."
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"The innocent words of a drunken child."
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"Prohibition. [Scoffs]"
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"Well, I'll tell you what we're looking at, young man. A town gone mad!"
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"They tried that in the movies, and it didn't work."
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"A town whose very conscience was washed away in a tide of beer and green vomit."
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"I predict this is the last we'll be hearing about prohibition."
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"- I'm going down to Moe's for a couple beers. - I'll come with you."
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"[All Chanting] We want prohibition! We want prohibition!"
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"No! No more drinking."
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"You can't seriously want to ban alcohol."
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"I'm tired of looking like the world's worst mother."
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"It tastes great, makes women appear more attractive..."
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"Oh, honey, you're not the world's worst mother."
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"and makes a person virtually invulnerable to criticism."
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"What about that freezer lady in Georgia?"
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"[Sobbing] Won't somebody please think of the children?"
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"- What kind of an example are we setting? - [Wiggum] Ladies, please."
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"All our founding fathers, astronauts and World Series heroes..."
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"have been either drunk or on cocaine."
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"Uh, uh, uh, wait. Lookee here. [Blows]"
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"Seems there's been a prohibition law on the books in Springfield for 200 years."
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"It's just never been enforced."
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"- [Voices Overlapping] - Get out of here, old clerk guy."
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"There's also a law requiring ducks to wear long pants."
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"Wait a minute! Let me see that!"
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"Well, I'll be darned. Long pants."
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"Read the other one, the non-duck one."
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"And spirituous beverages are hereby prohibited..."
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"under penalty of catapult."
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"[Chuckling] Did you see this, Bernice?"
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"Eh- Oh, my."
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"[Cheering]"
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"No, we're not worried. Our customers buy Duff..."
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"for its robust taste, not its alcoholic content."
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"I predict our new alcohol-free Duff Zero..."
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"will sell even better than our previous brand."
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"Oh! [Grunts]"
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"Well, that's the end of me."
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"## [Whistling]"
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"## [Up-tempoJazz]"
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"[Man Narrating] Dateline, Springfield."
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"With prohibition back in force, sobriety's peaceful slumber was shattered..."
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"by its noisy neighbor, the speakeasy."
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"Glad you're finally back in business, Moe."
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"Yeah. That was a scary couple of hours."
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"[Narrator] The suppliers of the illegal booze-"
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"gangsters- running truckloads of smuggled hooch..."
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"all the way from Shelbyville."
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"- And John Law was helpless. - You didn't see nothin'."
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"[Chuckles] I don't know why people are always bad-mouthing the Mafia."
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"## [Up-tempoJazz]"
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"[Belches]"
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"Whoo! Wa-ho!"
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