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Clips from B Positive - Bagels, Billiards and a Magic Show (S02E02)

Movies 2020 Season 2, Episode 3 140 min 489 clips
Thriller

Episodes from this show

[indistinct chatter]
"[indistinct chatter]"
B Positive
Hello. Good morning, everybody.
"Hello. Good morning, everybody."
B Positive
Can I have your attention?
"Can I have your attention?"
B Positive
Hi.
"Hi."
B Positive
I want to thank you all for coming.
"I want to thank you all for coming."
B Positive
I was told there'd be bagels.
"I was told there'd be bagels."
B Positive
And there will be.And cream cheese?
"And there will be.And cream cheese?"
B Positive
What is this, my first day?
"What is this, my first day?"
B Positive
Okay, I want to start
"Okay, I want to start"
B Positive
with some very exciting news.
"with some very exciting news."
B Positive
If you're making the bathrooms gender-neutral,
"If you're making the bathrooms gender-neutral,"
B Positive
I'll go outside in the bushes.
"I'll go outside in the bushes."
B Positive
"We suffer more in imagination than we do in reality."
""We suffer more in imagination than we do in reality.""
B Positive
Seneca, Roman philosopher.
"Seneca, Roman philosopher."
B Positive
"I only pee next to other dudes."
""I only pee next to other dudes.""
B Positive
Spencer Williams, American patriot.
"Spencer Williams, American patriot."
B Positive
GINA: Okay, um,
"GINA: Okay, um,"
B Positive
the news is... [laughs softly]
"the news is... [laughs softly]"
B Positive
...I bought the Valley Hills Assisted Living Facility.
"...I bought the Valley Hills Assisted Living Facility."
B Positive
Where you do the living...
"Where you do the living..."
B Positive
And we do the assisting.
"And we do the assisting."
B Positive
I told you that would die.
"I told you that would die."
B Positive
So, you actually did it?
"So, you actually did it?"
B Positive
You bought the place?
"You bought the place?"
B Positive
I did.
"I did."
B Positive
A-And the previous owners were so eager to sell
"A-And the previous owners were so eager to sell"
B Positive
that they threw all you guys in, no extra charge.
"that they threw all you guys in, no extra charge."
B Positive
Not a great feeling, is it?
"Not a great feeling, is it?"
B Positive
I have an appointment to fix a detached retina.
"I have an appointment to fix a detached retina."
B Positive
Can we move this along before I go blind in one eye?
"Can we move this along before I go blind in one eye?"
B Positive
So sorry, Bette. Hey, I love the shoes, by the way.
"So sorry, Bette. Hey, I love the shoes, by the way."
B Positive
Ooh, thanks.
"Ooh, thanks."
B Positive
I'm happy to loan.
"I'm happy to loan."
B Positive
Um, anyway, uh, you all know Gabby.
"Um, anyway, uh, you all know Gabby."
B Positive
And as of today, she is our new administrative vice president.
"And as of today, she is our new administrative vice president."
B Positive
I'll still be rolling you over when you have bed sores
"I'll still be rolling you over when you have bed sores"
B Positive
and sterilizing your catheters, but now
"and sterilizing your catheters, but now"
B Positive
I have a parking spot.
"I have a parking spot."
B Positive
We'll talk about that later.
"We'll talk about that later."
B Positive
And I'd also like to introduce you to my friend Gideon,
"And I'd also like to introduce you to my friend Gideon,"
B Positive
who is our new head nurse.
"who is our new head nurse."
B Positive
In addition to caring for your health needs,
"In addition to caring for your health needs,"
B Positive
I will also be reviving the Valley Hills theater program.
"I will also be reviving the Valley Hills theater program."
B Positive
So be sure to sign up for our first production,
"So be sure to sign up for our first production,"
B Positive
La Cage aux Folles.
"La Cage aux Folles."
B Positive
Maybe you should loan thisone your shoes.
"Maybe you should loan thisone your shoes."
B Positive
And I am very grateful
"And I am very grateful"
B Positive
to Mrs. Ludlum, who has agreed to stay on
"to Mrs. Ludlum, who has agreed to stay on"
B Positive
and help me turn this into the happiest place on Earth.
"and help me turn this into the happiest place on Earth."
B Positive
Suck on that, Disneyland.
"Suck on that, Disneyland."
B Positive
Now, as you all know,
"Now, as you all know,"
B Positive
Mr. Knudsen left me a-a great deal of money.
"Mr. Knudsen left me a-a great deal of money."
B Positive
I let him watch me shower, and he left me nothing.
"I let him watch me shower, and he left me nothing."
B Positive
Well, isn't that a special memory?
"Well, isn't that a special memory?"
B Positive
Uh, the thing is, um,
"Uh, the thing is, um,"
B Positive
I didn't just buy this place,
"I didn't just buy this place,"
B Positive
I am determined to make it better.
"I am determined to make it better."
B Positive
Is this shower deal available to anyone?
"Is this shower deal available to anyone?"
B Positive
Okay, okay, moving on. [chuckles]
"Okay, okay, moving on. [chuckles]"
B Positive
I want to open up the floor and hear from you guys.
"I want to open up the floor and hear from you guys."
B Positive
What can we do to make your golden years your best years?
"What can we do to make your golden years your best years?"
B Positive
SPENCER: Golden years?
"SPENCER: Golden years?"
B Positive
Every morning, I hack up a gallon of phlegm,
"Every morning, I hack up a gallon of phlegm,"
B Positive
I take 28 pills, and then try to put my Skechers on
"I take 28 pills, and then try to put my Skechers on"
B Positive
without sitting on my balls.
"without sitting on my balls."
B Positive
Show me the golden.
"Show me the golden."
B Positive
Want to make things better?
"Want to make things better?"
B Positive
HARRY: My wife's dying.
"HARRY: My wife's dying."
B Positive
She's in constant pain.
"She's in constant pain."
B Positive
Whenever she hits the call button
"Whenever she hits the call button"
B Positive
to go to the bathroom, somebody,
"to go to the bathroom, somebody,"
B Positive
maybe the vice president here,
"maybe the vice president here,"
B Positive
can actually show up and help her.
"can actually show up and help her."
B Positive
I'm sorry,
"I'm sorry,"
B Positive
but we're understaffed,
"but we're understaffed,"
B Positive
and I can't be everywhere at once.
"and I can't be everywhere at once."
B Positive
Well, you have enough time to smoke pot
"Well, you have enough time to smoke pot"
B Positive
on the pickleball court.
"on the pickleball court."
B Positive
HARRY:Mm-hmm.Harry, I will be hiring more staff,
"HARRY:Mm-hmm.Harry, I will be hiring more staff,"
B Positive
so waiting will no longer be an issue.
"so waiting will no longer be an issue."
B Positive
All right, what else?
"All right, what else?"
B Positive
Perhaps the chef could be improved upon.
"Perhaps the chef could be improved upon."
B Positive
What's wrong with the chef?
"What's wrong with the chef?"
B Positive
He was fired from Southwest Airlines.
"He was fired from Southwest Airlines."
B Positive
Maybe there's a clue in that.
"Maybe there's a clue in that."
B Positive
Okay, we're getting a new chef.
"Okay, we're getting a new chef."
B Positive
All right. Anything else?
"All right. Anything else?"
B Positive
The laundry service is a joke.
"The laundry service is a joke."
B Positive
All my clothes come back stretched out.
"All my clothes come back stretched out."
B Positive
Or you're shrinking.
"Or you're shrinking."
B Positive
The word is "tight." I'm tight.
"The word is "tight." I'm tight."
B Positive
I will look into the laundry.
"I will look into the laundry."
B Positive
We need better security.
"We need better security."
B Positive
We're sitting ducks for the terrorists.
"We're sitting ducks for the terrorists."
B Positive
Oh, sure, because they want to kill people
"Oh, sure, because they want to kill people"
B Positive
who are about to die.
"who are about to die."
B Positive
Very clever.
"Very clever."
B Positive
When they get here, I'm sending them to your room first.
"When they get here, I'm sending them to your room first."
B Positive
So they're not only coming, they take requests?
"So they're not only coming, they take requests?"
B Positive
Okay, we need to get back on track. [chuckles]
"Okay, we need to get back on track. [chuckles]"
B Positive
Um...
"Um..."
B Positive
I just want to close by saying that...
"I just want to close by saying that..."
B Positive
being of service to you and making your lives better
"being of service to you and making your lives better"
B Positive
is what gives my life purpose.
"is what gives my life purpose."
B Positive
You know what would give mylife purpose?
"You know what would give mylife purpose?"
B Positive
♪ The more you give ♪ The more you give♪
"♪ The more you give ♪ The more you give♪"
B Positive
♪ The more you live ♪ The more you live♪
"♪ The more you live ♪ The more you live♪"
B Positive
♪ Your happiness is relative ♪ Happiness♪
"♪ Your happiness is relative ♪ Happiness♪"
B Positive
♪ And if you're feeling like crap ♪
"♪ And if you're feeling like crap ♪"
B Positive
♪ It's time to face the fact
"♪ It's time to face the fact"
B Positive
♪ It's your prerogative
"♪ It's your prerogative"
B Positive
♪ Your prerogative♪
"♪ Your prerogative♪"
B Positive
♪ To be positive.
"♪ To be positive."
B Positive
Ooh. This banana is kind of tired.
"Ooh. This banana is kind of tired."
B Positive
What do you say we toss it and get you a new one?
"What do you say we toss it and get you a new one?"
B Positive
Got it. That's a keeper.
"Got it. That's a keeper."
B Positive
How's it going?
"How's it going?"
B Positive
Ooh, I'm all packed up.
"Ooh, I'm all packed up."
B Positive
Uh, any of my clothes you find lying around,
"Uh, any of my clothes you find lying around,"
B Positive
you can give to the Goodwill.
"you can give to the Goodwill."
B Positive