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Clips from Lucifer - The One with the Baby Carrot (S03E03)

"Do you remember the name of the, uh, warm-up comedian?"
Lucifer
"Uh, Shelly maybe, or...?"
Lucifer
"- Sheila? - Yeah, that was it."
Lucifer
"Do you know her?"
Lucifer
"We're done here."
Lucifer
"What? Detective, what did I miss?"
Lucifer
"Who's Sheila?"
Lucifer
"Sheila's the name of Bobby Lowe's warm-up comedian."
Lucifer
"Right."
Lucifer
"Detective, are you sure that Sheila's here?"
Lucifer
"Her roommate said that she'd be here working on new jokes, so..."
Lucifer
"Well, I still don't understand."
Lucifer
"She seemed devastated when Bobby said he was a joke thief."
Lucifer
"Well, maybe she's not pissed off about the theft."
Lucifer
"What? Well, then, what else would she be angry about?"
Lucifer
"Let's find out."
Lucifer
"Okay."
Lucifer
"As if these puppets weren't creepy enough."
Lucifer
"Hello?"
Lucifer
"Anyone here?"
Lucifer
"Hello?"
Lucifer
"Lucifer?"
Lucifer
"Hello, Detective."
Lucifer
"Sorry."
Lucifer
"Well, don't worry. At least I don't have a gun up my bum."
Lucifer
"If you're not gonna take this seriously,"
Lucifer
"then you wait here for me."
Lucifer
"Okay."
Lucifer
"Okay."
Lucifer
"Hello?"
Lucifer
"Anyone here?"
Lucifer
"What, what's going on?"
Lucifer
"- Is she still here? - Who? She? Sheila?"
Lucifer
"Did she do this to you?"
Lucifer
"I told her I was gonna quit,"
Lucifer
"and-and she freaked out on me, started screaming"
Lucifer
"about everything she-she'd done for me."
Lucifer
"But I-I can't take it any-anymore. My craft..."
Lucifer
"Okay, midlife crisis later. How long ago?"
Lucifer
"Uh, a few minutes maybe."
Lucifer
"We-we heard you come in, and then she hit me"
Lucifer
"with the butt of her, of her gun... in the face!"
Lucifer
"- She has a gun? - Did-did you hear me?!"
Lucifer
"I said, in-in the face! This is my moneymaker!"
Lucifer
"- Am I okay? - Lucifer, she's here!"
Lucifer
"- No. - She's armed!"
Lucifer
"Why did you do it, Sheila?"
Lucifer
"Get out of the way!"
Lucifer
"I'm getting out of here."
Lucifer
"Well, once you answer my question,"
Lucifer
"I'll gladly let you past."
Lucifer
"Why kill and torture a man for this pretentious hack?"
Lucifer
"Do you know how hard it is to crawl out of the stand-up world"
Lucifer
"and get a gig like this?"
Lucifer
"But he's a fellow comedian."
Lucifer
"Why would you kill for someone"
Lucifer
"who stole jokes from one of your own?"
Lucifer
"So he stole material."
Lucifer
"Hell, he stole half my set, too. Who cares?!"
Lucifer
"You should!"
Lucifer
"It's yours!"
Lucifer
"One might say your very identity."
Lucifer
"Jokes don't make a comedian."
Lucifer
"Everyone has an itchy butt joke."
Lucifer
"It's all about what you do with it."
Lucifer
"What you do with your itchy butt?"
Lucifer
"- With the joke! - Oh."
Lucifer
"So, what you're saying is,"
Lucifer
"it's okay to steal someone's work as long"
Lucifer
"as you do it better?"
Lucifer
"And take me with you? Hell yeah, it is."
Lucifer
"- Oh... - Now, if you don't get out of my way..."
Lucifer
"I swear..."
Lucifer
"Excellent work, Detective."
Lucifer
"Okay, so... how do we get her down from here?"
Lucifer
"Daniel?"
Lucifer
"- You're not gonna throw a tomato at me, are you? - Ugh."
Lucifer
"Come now, Daniel."
Lucifer
"I only did that for the good of the case."
Lucifer
"Also, I ran out, but more importantly,"
Lucifer
"did you text me to come here?"
Lucifer
"I didn't recognize the number, so I assumed it was you."
Lucifer
"You didn't save my number?"
Lucifer
"It was me."
Lucifer
"Too much hard work to break into my penthouse again"
Lucifer
"for a heart-to-heart?"
Lucifer
"I did some digging, and you were right."
Lucifer
"The Sinnerman is here in L.A."
Lucifer
"Oh, right."
Lucifer
"Are you not gonna take my advice"
Lucifer
"- from last night? - Most definitely not."
Lucifer
"I thought so."
Lucifer
"You brought the Sinnerman's murderous thug in."
Lucifer
"He's all yours."
Lucifer
"I couldn't get anything out of him. Maybe you can."
Lucifer
"Oh. Right."
Lucifer
"So, what, is this you passing the baton?"
Lucifer
"- Where are you running off to next? - Nowhere."
Lucifer
"I'm seeing this through."
Lucifer
"But you need to shut your damn mouth about the Sinnerman."
Lucifer
"We need to play this carefully."
Lucifer
"Let's keep it between us."
Lucifer
"The less people who know about it,"
Lucifer
"the less chance anyone gets hurt."
Lucifer
"- But the detective... - Has a kid."
Lucifer
"She stays out of it."
Lucifer
"Very well."
Lucifer
"Hello, Alonso."
Lucifer
"Let's cut to the chase, shall we?"
Lucifer
"I know the Sinnerman had you skewer Sam under the pier,"
Lucifer
"so tell me everything."
Lucifer
"Who the hell's the Sinnerman?"
Lucifer
"Fine."
Lucifer
"Fine. Let's play a little game, shall we?"
Lucifer
"Look at me."
Lucifer
"Tell me."
Lucifer
"Why did you really desire Sam's death?"
Lucifer
"I... didn't want my girl to sleep with him anymore."
Lucifer
"And?"
Lucifer
"And... that's it."
Lucifer
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