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Clips from Cheers - Peterson Crusoe (S03E03)

CHEERS IS FILMED BEFORE A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE.

"CHEERS IS FILMED BEFORE A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE."

Cheers

A BLOODY MARY FOR YOU, VODKA COLLINS,

"A BLOODY MARY FOR YOU, VODKA COLLINS,"

Cheers

AND AN OLD FASHIONED, LIGHT ON THE BITTERS.

"AND AN OLD FASHIONED, LIGHT ON THE BITTERS."

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OOH, DIANE, LOOK. I THINK...

"OOH, DIANE, LOOK. I THINK..."

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I THINK YOU GOT IT PERFECT THIS TIME--

"I THINK YOU GOT IT PERFECT THIS TIME--"

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EVERY DRINK WRONG.

"EVERY DRINK WRONG."

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MY GOD! WHAT IS THIS?

"MY GOD! WHAT IS THIS?"

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BOY, DOES YOUR WAITRESSING STINK.

"BOY, DOES YOUR WAITRESSING STINK."

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MY WAITRESSING DOES NOT STINK.

"MY WAITRESSING DOES NOT STINK."

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IT DOES, TOO.

"IT DOES, TOO."

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Diane: DOESN'T.

"Diane: DOESN'T."

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Carla: DOES.

"Carla: DOES."

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IF I REALLY PUT MY MIND TO IT,

"IF I REALLY PUT MY MIND TO IT,"

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I COULD WAITRESS CIRCLES AROUND YOU.

"I COULD WAITRESS CIRCLES AROUND YOU."

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YOU STINK!

"YOU STINK!"

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I SMELL A WAGER, CARLA.

"I SMELL A WAGER, CARLA."

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NO. YOU SMELL YOUR WAITRESSING.

"NO. YOU SMELL YOUR WAITRESSING."

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I CHALLENGE YOU TO A WAITRESSING CONTEST.

"I CHALLENGE YOU TO A WAITRESSING CONTEST."

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WHOEVER GETS THE MOST TIPS BETWEEN NOW AND CLOSING TIME WINS.

"WHOEVER GETS THE MOST TIPS BETWEEN NOW AND CLOSING TIME WINS."

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YOU'RE ON, SUCKER.

"YOU'RE ON, SUCKER."

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I'LL EVEN GIVE YOU A 10 BUCK HEAD START.

"I'LL EVEN GIVE YOU A 10 BUCK HEAD START."

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THAT'S AN INSULT.

"THAT'S AN INSULT."

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AND THANK YOU.

"AND THANK YOU."

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WE WILL NEED A JUDGE

"WE WILL NEED A JUDGE"

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TO MAKE SURE THIS CONTEST IS CONDUCTED ON THE UP AND UP.

"TO MAKE SURE THIS CONTEST IS CONDUCTED ON THE UP AND UP."

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SAM'S BAR. WE'LL LET HIM BE THE JUDGE.

"SAM'S BAR. WE'LL LET HIM BE THE JUDGE."

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OH, LADIES, I'M HONORED,

"OH, LADIES, I'M HONORED,"

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BUT DON'T YOU THINK IT WOULD BE BETTER TO FIND

"BUT DON'T YOU THINK IT WOULD BE BETTER TO FIND"

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SOMEONE TO JUDGE THIS WHO GIVES A RAT'S BEHIND?

"SOMEONE TO JUDGE THIS WHO GIVES A RAT'S BEHIND?"

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WELL, I DO. MAKE ME THE JUDGE.

"WELL, I DO. MAKE ME THE JUDGE."

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OH! WE COULDN'T HAVE A MORE IMPARTIAL JUDGE.

"OH! WE COULDN'T HAVE A MORE IMPARTIAL JUDGE."

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THANK YOU, DIANE. NOW, IF EITHER ONE OF YOU

"THANK YOU, DIANE. NOW, IF EITHER ONE OF YOU"

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SUSPECTS ANY WRONGDOING, YOU COME TO ME,

"SUSPECTS ANY WRONGDOING, YOU COME TO ME,"

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AND I'LL MAKE AN IMMEDIATE AND FINAL DECISION.

"AND I'LL MAKE AN IMMEDIATE AND FINAL DECISION."

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DO WE HAVE ANY APPEAL?

"DO WE HAVE ANY APPEAL?"

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WELL, I THINK YOU'RE BOTH CUTE AS A BUTTON,

"WELL, I THINK YOU'RE BOTH CUTE AS A BUTTON,"

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BUT THAT'S NOT GOING TO AFFECT MY DECISION.

"BUT THAT'S NOT GOING TO AFFECT MY DECISION."

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* MAKIN' YOUR WAY IN THE WORLD TODAY *

"* MAKIN' YOUR WAY IN THE WORLD TODAY *"

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* TAKES EVERYTHING YOU'VE GOT *

"* TAKES EVERYTHING YOU'VE GOT *"

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* TAKIN' A BREAK FROM ALL YOUR WORRIES *

"* TAKIN' A BREAK FROM ALL YOUR WORRIES *"

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* SURE WOULD HELP A LOT *

"* SURE WOULD HELP A LOT *"

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* WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO GET AWAY? *

"* WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO GET AWAY? *"

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* SOMETIMES YOU WANNA GO *

"* SOMETIMES YOU WANNA GO *"

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* WHERE EVERYBODY KNOWS YOUR NAME *

"* WHERE EVERYBODY KNOWS YOUR NAME *"

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* AND THEY'RE ALWAYS GLAD YOU CAME *

"* AND THEY'RE ALWAYS GLAD YOU CAME *"

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* YOU WANNA BE WHERE YOU CAN SEE *

"* YOU WANNA BE WHERE YOU CAN SEE *"

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* OUR TROUBLES ARE ALL THE SAME *

"* OUR TROUBLES ARE ALL THE SAME *"

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* YOU WANNA BE WHERE EVERYBODY KNOWS YOUR NAME *

"* YOU WANNA BE WHERE EVERYBODY KNOWS YOUR NAME *"

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* YOU WANNA GO WHERE PEOPLE KNOW *

"* YOU WANNA GO WHERE PEOPLE KNOW *"

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* PEOPLE ARE ALL THE SAME *

"* PEOPLE ARE ALL THE SAME *"

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* YOU WANNA GO WHERE EVERYBODY KNOWS YOUR NAME *

"* YOU WANNA GO WHERE EVERYBODY KNOWS YOUR NAME *"

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OOP, OOP. GET READY FOR THE GOOD TIMES.

"OOP, OOP. GET READY FOR THE GOOD TIMES."

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THE BIG GUY DOTH APPROACH.

"THE BIG GUY DOTH APPROACH."

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AFTERNOON, EVERYBODY.

"AFTERNOON, EVERYBODY."

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NORMIE? NORM?

"NORMIE? NORM?"

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Diane: NORMAN?

"Diane: NORMAN?"

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WHY DON'T YOU SIT DOWN, NORM?

"WHY DON'T YOU SIT DOWN, NORM?"

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WHAT-- WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?

"WHAT-- WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?"

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YOU KNOW THAT JOB I LANDED OVER IN BRAINTREE?

"YOU KNOW THAT JOB I LANDED OVER IN BRAINTREE?"

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MM-HMM.

"MM-HMM."

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I HAD TO TAKE A COMPANY PHYSICAL THIS AFTERNOON,

"I HAD TO TAKE A COMPANY PHYSICAL THIS AFTERNOON,"

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AND APPARENTLY THERE WAS SOMETHING ON THE CHEST X-RAY.

"AND APPARENTLY THERE WAS SOMETHING ON THE CHEST X-RAY."

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SOMETHING BAD, NORMIE?

"SOMETHING BAD, NORMIE?"

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NO, A HAPPY FACE.

"NO, A HAPPY FACE."

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SORRY, COACH.

"SORRY, COACH."

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YEAH, SOMETHING BAD. A SPOT OF SOME SORT.

"YEAH, SOMETHING BAD. A SPOT OF SOME SORT."

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THEY SENT IT OVER TO A SPECIALIST TO TAKE A LOOK.

"THEY SENT IT OVER TO A SPECIALIST TO TAKE A LOOK."

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WELL, NOW, NORM,

"WELL, NOW, NORM,"

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THESE THINGS HAPPEN SOMETIMES,

"THESE THINGS HAPPEN SOMETIMES,"

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AND THEY TURN OUT TO BE NOTHING.

"AND THEY TURN OUT TO BE NOTHING."

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THEY JUST COME TO NOTHING.

"THEY JUST COME TO NOTHING."

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YEAH. WE ALL COME TO NOTHING, SAM.

"YEAH. WE ALL COME TO NOTHING, SAM."

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I'M JUST GONNA GET THERE A LITTLE SOONER.

"I'M JUST GONNA GET THERE A LITTLE SOONER."

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NORMAN, YOU'RE JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS.

"NORMAN, YOU'RE JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS."

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NOW, STOP BEING SO MORBID.

"NOW, STOP BEING SO MORBID."

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EVER SINCE I HEARD THIS NEWS,

"EVER SINCE I HEARD THIS NEWS,"

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ALL I CAN THINK OF IS HOW I MAY BE COMING TO THE END OF MY LIFE

"ALL I CAN THINK OF IS HOW I MAY BE COMING TO THE END OF MY LIFE"

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WITH NOTHING TO SHOW FOR IT.

"WITH NOTHING TO SHOW FOR IT."

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WELL, YOU'VE GOT ALL OF US, YOUR FRIENDS,

"WELL, YOU'VE GOT ALL OF US, YOUR FRIENDS,"

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AND WE'RE GOING TO BE WITH YOU ALL THROUGH THIS.

"AND WE'RE GOING TO BE WITH YOU ALL THROUGH THIS."

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YOU MEAN WE'RE GOING TO HAVE TO HAVE THE SURGERY AND EVERYTHING, DIANE?

"YOU MEAN WE'RE GOING TO HAVE TO HAVE THE SURGERY AND EVERYTHING, DIANE?"

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I'M NOT SAYING I WON'T DO IT.

"I'M NOT SAYING I WON'T DO IT."

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I'LL EXPLAIN IT LATER, COACH.

"I'LL EXPLAIN IT LATER, COACH."

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EVERYBODY SAYS, "I'LL EXPLAIN IT LATER."

"EVERYBODY SAYS, "I'LL EXPLAIN IT LATER.""

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[TELEPHONE RINGS]

"[TELEPHONE RINGS]"

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CHEERS.

"CHEERS."

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OH, HI.

"OH, HI."

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YEAH. UH...

"YEAH. UH..."

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NORM, IT'S VERA.

"NORM, IT'S VERA."

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SHE SAYS SHE NEEDS TO TALK TO YOU RIGHT AWAY.

"SHE SAYS SHE NEEDS TO TALK TO YOU RIGHT AWAY."

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SHE'S HEARD FROM THE DOCTOR.

"SHE'S HEARD FROM THE DOCTOR."

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HI, HONEY.

"HI, HONEY."

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YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I FIGURED.

"YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I FIGURED."

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SO WHAT'D HE SAY?

"SO WHAT'D HE SAY?"

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OH!

"OH!"

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OHHH!

"OHHH!"

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OHHHH!

"OHHHH!"

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OH! NO, NO. THAT'S THE GREATEST NEWS.

"OH! NO, NO. THAT'S THE GREATEST NEWS."

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I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE IT."

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YES, YOU'RE RIGHT, WE DO HAVE SOMETHING TO CELEBRATE.

"YES, YOU'RE RIGHT, WE DO HAVE SOMETHING TO CELEBRATE."

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SO WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?

"SO WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?"

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YEAH, SOUNDS GOOD. THAT SOUNDS GOOD.

"YEAH, SOUNDS GOOD. THAT SOUNDS GOOD."

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NO, NO. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'LL DO.

"NO, NO. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'LL DO."

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I CAN'T THINK ABOUT IT RIGHT NOW.

"I CAN'T THINK ABOUT IT RIGHT NOW."

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I HAVE A LOT OF OTHER THINGS ON MY MIND. YEAH.

"I HAVE A LOT OF OTHER THINGS ON MY MIND. YEAH."

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I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER, HONEY. BYE.

"I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER, HONEY. BYE."

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A FLAW ON THE X-RAY.

"A FLAW ON THE X-RAY."

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OH! OH!

"OH! OH!"

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LET ME BUY YOU A DRINK, NORMIE.

"LET ME BUY YOU A DRINK, NORMIE."

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NO. NO, NO, NO. NOT RIGHT NOW, CLIFF.

"NO. NO, NO, NO. NOT RIGHT NOW, CLIFF."

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RIGHT NOW, I THINK I'M GONNA TAKE A LITTLE WALK

"RIGHT NOW, I THINK I'M GONNA TAKE A LITTLE WALK"

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WITH A GENTLEMAN I HAVEN'T BEEN PAYING

"WITH A GENTLEMAN I HAVEN'T BEEN PAYING"

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A WHOLE LOT OF ATTENTION TO LATELY-- NORM PETERSON.

"A WHOLE LOT OF ATTENTION TO LATELY-- NORM PETERSON."

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I THINK I UNDERSTAND.

"I THINK I UNDERSTAND."

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WELL, I DON'T, BUT I'M SURE YOU'LL TELL ME LATER.

"WELL, I DON'T, BUT I'M SURE YOU'LL TELL ME LATER."

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WELL, CARLA, COUNTING THE 10 BUCK HEAD START

"WELL, CARLA, COUNTING THE 10 BUCK HEAD START"

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THAT YOU GAVE DIANE, YOU'RE STILL AHEAD $9.00,

"THAT YOU GAVE DIANE, YOU'RE STILL AHEAD $9.00,"

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AND YOU'VE GOT ONLY ONE MINUTE TO GO.

"AND YOU'VE GOT ONLY ONE MINUTE TO GO."

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YEAH! BUT YOU KNOW, DIANE GAVE ME A GOOD CONTEST.

"YEAH! BUT YOU KNOW, DIANE GAVE ME A GOOD CONTEST."

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I MEAN, SHE HUSTLED WHAT PASSES FOR HER BUNS OFF TONIGHT.

"I MEAN, SHE HUSTLED WHAT PASSES FOR HER BUNS OFF TONIGHT."

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