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Clips from Seinfeld - The Sniffing Accountant (S05E05)

"I was looking pretty hot."
Seinfeld
"- I was wearing my slingback pumps. - What are those?"
Seinfeld
"Ask your mother. You live with her now, don't you?"
Seinfeld
"Anyway..."
Seinfeld
"...then this guy comes up to me, and he starts feeling my jacket..."
Seinfeld
"...between his thumb and forefinger like this."
Seinfeld
"- So, what'd you do? - I said, "What do you think?""
Seinfeld
"And he said, "Gabardine?""
Seinfeld
"And I said, "Yeah. " That was it."
Seinfeld
"- Just felt your material? - Yeah. Jake Jarmel."
Seinfeld
"- Sounds like a cool guy. - Sounds like a jerk."
Seinfeld
"Felt your material, come on."
Seinfeld
"- Jerry, where'd you get that sweater? - In the back of my closet."
Seinfeld
"I think that's what the back of closets are for."
Seinfeld
"Hey, that's Barry."
Seinfeld
"Lookit. Barry."
Seinfeld
"- Hey. - Hi."
Seinfeld
"- Who is that? - That's Barry Prophet, our accountant."
Seinfeld
"I don't know how can you let this guy handle your money."
Seinfeld
"Not my money. He handles Jerry's money. He just does my taxes."
Seinfeld
"- Barry, how you doing? - How are you?"
Seinfeld
"- This is my friend George. - Hey."
Seinfeld
"What are you doing in this neighborhood?"
Seinfeld
"Nothing, really."
Seinfeld
"- You... You eat here? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"- So how's my money? - Well, it's still green."
Seinfeld
"- What, do you got a cold? - No. No."
Seinfeld
"- Look at that ring. - Oh, you like that?"
Seinfeld
"Hey, say, where's the bathroom?"
Seinfeld
"Bathroom? Bathroom's right over there."
Seinfeld
"Great."
Seinfeld
"Did you see that?"
Seinfeld
"- See what? - Yes, I saw that."
Seinfeld
"- What? - What was all that sniffing?"
Seinfeld
"- I don't know. - You don't think...?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, no. Come on, Jerry."
Seinfeld
"He was definitely sniffing."
Seinfeld
"I mean, what if-? This guy's got all my money."
Seinfeld
"Plus, I got some of Kramer's money with him."
Seinfeld
"He can write checks to himself from my account."
Seinfeld
"I've known this guy since college. He doesn't do drugs."
Seinfeld
"- Then what was all that sniffing? - Maybe it's the cold weather."
Seinfeld
"Today's not cold."
Seinfeld
"All right, I gotta get going. My parents are expecting me."
Seinfeld
"Don't forget to wash your hands before supper."
Seinfeld
"What do you need all that ketchup for?"
Seinfeld
"This is my ketchup."
Seinfeld
"I bought this ketchup..."
Seinfeld
"...just so I could have as much as I want."
Seinfeld
"So I... I talked to Phil Kassikoff today."
Seinfeld
"Phil Kassikoff?"
Seinfeld
"Yeah. You know, my friend, the bra salesman?"
Seinfeld
"He says they're looking for somebody..."
Seinfeld
"...so I got you an interview next Friday with his boss."
Seinfeld
"- Next Friday? What time? - Two o'clock."
Seinfeld
"That's my whole afternoon. I was gonna look for sneakers."
Seinfeld
"You can look for sneakers the next day!"
Seinfeld
"He doesn't know anything about bras."
Seinfeld
"I know a little."
Seinfeld
"Besides, what do you have to know?"
Seinfeld
"Well, it wouldn't hurt to go in and be able to discuss it intelligently."
Seinfeld
"Maybe you should take a look at a few bras."
Seinfeld
"Where's your bra? Give him a bra to look at."
Seinfeld
"I'm not giving him a bra."
Seinfeld
"- Why not? - I don't need him looking at my bra."
Seinfeld
"Fine. He'll go into the interview..."
Seinfeld
"...he wouldn't know what he's talking about."
Seinfeld
"Do we have to...?"
Seinfeld
"You don't even know what they're made from."
Seinfeld
"- They're made from Lycra spandex. - Get out of here. Lycra spandex?"
Seinfeld
"I think they are made from Lycra spandex."
Seinfeld
"- Wanna bet? How much? - I'm not betting."
Seinfeld
"- Take a look. - All right, I'll get a bra."
Seinfeld
"I don't know what the big problem is getting a bra."
Seinfeld
"She doesn't wanna get a bra."
Seinfeld
"I'm not saying, "Go to the library and read the history.""
Seinfeld
"But it wouldn't kill you to know a little bit about it."
Seinfeld
"All right, it wouldn't kill me."
Seinfeld
"How long does it take to find a bra?"
Seinfeld
"What's going on in there?"
Seinfeld
"You ask me to get a pair of underwear, I'm back in two seconds."
Seinfeld
"You know about the cup sizes and all?"
Seinfeld
"- They have different cups. - Yeah, I know about the cups."
Seinfeld
"You got the A..."
Seinfeld
"...the B..."
Seinfeld
"...the C..."
Seinfeld
"...the D. That's the biggest."
Seinfeld
"I know the D is the biggest."
Seinfeld
"I base my whole life on knowing that the D is the biggest."
Seinfeld
"- Here. Here's the bra. - Let me see it."
Seinfeld
""One hundred percent Lycra spandex.""
Seinfeld
"- Let me see. - I told you."
Seinfeld
"Here. You think you know everything."
Seinfeld
"That's surprising."
Seinfeld
"All right, what else?"
Seinfeld
"You got the cups in the front..."
Seinfeld
"...two loops in the back, all right?"
Seinfeld
"- I guess that's about it. - I got it. Cups in front, loops in back."
Seinfeld
"You got ketchup on it."
Seinfeld
"Sniffing? What do you mean, sniffing?"
Seinfeld
"- Sniffing. With his nose. - Jerry, he probably had a cold."
Seinfeld
"- No, he didn't. I asked him. - So, what are you saying?"
Seinfeld
"- I don't know. You know, what if...? - Drugs?"
Seinfeld
"- You think he's on drugs? - I don't know."
Seinfeld
"- Jerry- - All I know is he was sniffing."
Seinfeld
"- Listen, we went in on a CD together. - I know."
Seinfeld
"And Newman gave you money too."
Seinfeld
"See, I didn't even meet this guy. We trusted you."
Seinfeld
"Look, it doesn't necessarily mean anything yet."
Seinfeld
"- It just means he was sniffing. - Well, what else? Was he nervous?"
Seinfeld
"Did he use a lot of slang? Did he use the word " man"?"
Seinfeld
"No, he didn't use " man.""
Seinfeld
"I mean, when he was leaving, did he say, "I'm splitting"?"
Seinfeld
"No, but at one point, he did use the bathroom."
Seinfeld
"- You think that's a bad sign? - Yes, that's what they do."
Seinfeld
"They live in the bathroom."
Seinfeld
"What are we gonna do? We're gonna get our money, right?"
Seinfeld
"I don't know. This sweater really itches me."
Seinfeld
"- You want it? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"Hello. Hel-"
Seinfeld
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