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Clips from Mr. Mayor - Venus on the Moon (S02E02)

"Oh, my God! School!"
Mr. Mayor
"What did you do to help me get into Gregory?"
Mr. Mayor
"Gregory? No, no--nothing."
Mr. Mayor
"So it's just a coincidence"
Mr. Mayor
"that my first year they broke ground"
Mr. Mayor
"on the Anonymous Tall Dad Science Center?"
Mr. Mayor
"[sighs]"
Mr. Mayor
"Unbelievable!"
Mr. Mayor
"My whole life, you've been bribing people"
Mr. Mayor
"into letting me think I'm special,"
Mr. Mayor
"like you're Aaron Spelling and I'm Tori!"
Mr. Mayor
"I know you're studying the Spellings"
Mr. Mayor
"in AP Beverly Hills History, but I'm--"
Mr. Mayor
"If mom were here,"
Mr. Mayor
"she never would have let you do any of this!"
Mr. Mayor
"She learned from failure."
Mr. Mayor
"Yes, yes. I've seen the videos your mom left for you."
Mr. Mayor
"I'm not gonna be around to watch you grow up"
Mr. Mayor
"into this strong, beautiful woman I know you'll be."
Mr. Mayor
"Just remember,"
Mr. Mayor
"you learn more from failure than success, baby girl."
Mr. Mayor
"I learned that auditioning for "American Pie.""
Mr. Mayor
"My second piece of advice:"
Mr. Mayor
"if you're on your period during a lingerie shoot--"
Mr. Mayor
"Mom wouldn't have helped me cheat my way"
Mr. Mayor
"into the Youth Leadership Program."
Mr. Mayor
"Orly, if you don't think that you got this job on your own,"
Mr. Mayor
"you're free to quit."
Mr. Mayor
"No, quitting is what a privileged brat would do."
Mr. Mayor
"Those other kids, they worked real hard to be here,"
Mr. Mayor
"and now it's my turn."
Mr. Mayor
"You don't want to start by maybe"
Mr. Mayor
"unloading the dishwasher at home?"
Mr. Mayor
"And deprive Cecilia"
Mr. Mayor
"the dignity of a hard day's work?"
Mr. Mayor
"Oh, okay, well, can we play again later?"
Mr. Mayor
"My daughter has decided that she has been coddled,"
Mr. Mayor
"and now she wants to do real work."
Mr. Mayor
"Just give her some basic office stuff to do, please."
Mr. Mayor
"Does she know Excel?"
Mr. Mayor
"Because I have some polling data--"
Mr. Mayor
"No. Nothing complicated."
Mr. Mayor
"Just point her toward a task any idiot could do"
Mr. Mayor
"and then say "Good job.""
Mr. Mayor
"Got it. I'll put on my kid gloves,"
Mr. Mayor
"and handle your daughter-- wow, hearing it, sir."
Mr. Mayor
"You know, I'm not the one who said that"
Mr. Mayor
"she should never have a minimum wage job."
Mr. Mayor
"I'm, I'm not the one who insisted"
Mr. Mayor
"that she go to private school."
Mr. Mayor
"It was Natalie."
Mr. Mayor
"Before she died, she laid it all out."
Mr. Mayor
"[sighs] Dead wives."
Mr. Mayor
"Can't live with them. Obviously."
Mr. Mayor
"Then, when Orly gets mad at me,"
Mr. Mayor
"I can't exactly go blame her dead mother."
Mr. Mayor
"At this point, her only memories of Natalie"
Mr. Mayor
"are from-- [sighs]"
Mr. Mayor
"From those videos she made."
Mr. Mayor
"Wait, you let her watch those?"
Mr. Mayor
"Excuse me?"
Mr. Mayor
"I pretty much wore out my VHS copy"
Mr. Mayor
"of "Venus on the Moon""
Mr. Mayor
"with her and Nicole Eggert. [laughs]"
Mr. Mayor
"I finally understand what you earthlings mean"
Mr. Mayor
"by super horny."
Mr. Mayor
"I wrote a letter to the studio"
Mr. Mayor
"asking them to release it on DVD,"
Mr. Mayor
"but evidently, that company just sells dog toys now."
Mr. Mayor
"Thank you, Jayden."
Mr. Mayor
"Yes, I'm aware of my wife's late-'90s acting career."
Mr. Mayor
"I meant the videos she made for Orly before she died."
Mr. Mayor
"I love you baby girl, and I will always be watching you."
Mr. Mayor
"Just remember,"
Mr. Mayor
"real modeling agencies don't make you pay for headshots."
Mr. Mayor
"I loved that woman."
Mr. Mayor
"But now, she's forever perfect, and I'm forever the bad guy."
Mr. Mayor
"Come on, sir. Bad guys are cooler, right?"
Mr. Mayor
"Look at Gru."
Mr. Mayor
"Hmm."
Mr. Mayor
"Councilman Higbee!"
Mr. Mayor
"Is now a good time?"
Mr. Mayor
"To talk, or in my life?"
Mr. Mayor
"'Cause I started betting on sports,"
Mr. Mayor
"and I'm pretty addicted--"
Mr. Mayor
"I wanna revisit ordinance 462."
Mr. Mayor
"No. Everyone in this city"
Mr. Mayor
"is not owed free broadband internet."
Mr. Mayor
"It's crucial to the economy."
Mr. Mayor
"People working remotely, people searching for jobs."
Mr. Mayor
"Did you know 25 percent of L. A. public schoolkids"
Mr. Mayor
"don't have internet at home?"
Mr. Mayor
"So, what?"
Mr. Mayor
"Kids today spend too much time on the internet already."
Mr. Mayor
"Why burn more money on "education?""
Mr. Mayor
"They're all gonna be gig workers and cam girls anyway."
Mr. Mayor
"Hang on a second. Guys!"
Mr. Mayor
"I know I told you to wait outside, but come here."
Mr. Mayor
"[nervous chuckle]"
Mr. Mayor
"Councilman Higbee was just talking about the youth"
Mr. Mayor
"of this great city. [laughs]"
Mr. Mayor
"Frank, please, go on."
Mr. Mayor
"I was just telling the deputy mayor,"
Mr. Mayor
"it won't be long until you kids are running the show."
Mr. Mayor
"And I can't wait."
Mr. Mayor
"So we can count on your support"
Mr. Mayor
"to bring ordinance 462 to a vote for L. A.'s future."
Mr. Mayor
"- Count me in. - Kids, let's be sure"
Mr. Mayor
"we record this historic moment."
Mr. Mayor
"Already livestreaming it."
Mr. Mayor
"Feel that, Frank?"
Mr. Mayor
"That's all 92 pounds of me"
Mr. Mayor
"stepping right on your huevos."
Mr. Mayor
"Okay, proposal for library book amnesty, done."
Mr. Mayor
"Seating chart for the LACMA banquet, done."
Mr. Mayor
"If you believe it, you can achieve it."
Mr. Mayor
"And I believe I'm getting drunk tonight."
Mr. Mayor
"Hey, so you know how the mayor was supposed to apologize"
Mr. Mayor
"to the Boyle Heights food vendors today?"
Mr. Mayor
"- Uh... - Well, our Spanish interpreter"
Mr. Mayor
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