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Clips from Family Guy - Stewie Loves Lois (S05E05)

"but I turned out to be the guinea pig for his sexual experimentation."
Family Guy
"You guys are a bunch of queers."
Family Guy
"And so am I! Oh, God, it was horrible!"
Family Guy
"I scrubbed, and I scrubbed, but damn it, they don't make water hot enough!"
Family Guy
"My God, we've all been victims of Dr. Hartman's prostate exam."
Family Guy
"Well, gentlemen, the abuse stops here. I will not turn a brown eye to this."
Family Guy
"I am going to sue that bastard and make him pay out the ass."
Family Guy
"No ifs, ands, or buts. I'm going to be really anal about this."
Family Guy
"Sphincter."
Family Guy
"Good morning, Lois."
Family Guy
"My, Stewie, you're in a good mood today."
Family Guy
"Well, why shouldn't I be?"
Family Guy
"You saved Rupert's life, and I love you for it."
Family Guy
"So, warn the villagers. Here comes the cuddle monster."
Family Guy
"Oh, Lois, your breasts are great."
Family Guy
"Well, good morning, Mr. Nipple."
Family Guy
"Hey, there. Must be cold in here."
Family Guy
"Peter, you're going to sue Dr. Hartman?"
Family Guy
"You can't do that, all he did was give you a prostate exam."
Family Guy
"Are you saying I asked for this to happen?"
Family Guy
"You know, Dad, there's this lawyer at the mall"
Family Guy
"who says he'll take any case,"
Family Guy
"no matter how frivolous."
Family Guy
"Yeah, yeah, and they also have an Orange Julius."
Family Guy
"Just... Just trying to keep the conversation going."
Family Guy
"Well, whatever happens, I'm not going to stand for this."
Family Guy
"Too many people get away with injustice."
Family Guy
"Like the folks you meet in those Louisiana swamps."
Family Guy
"Excuse me, do you know how to get to town?"
Family Guy
"Yeah, it's back the way you came."
Family Guy
"I love you, Lois. You know that, right? Just in case, I'll say it again. I love you."
Family Guy
"Oh, you are just so cute, sweetie. Look at that little foot."
Family Guy
"I'm gonna eat that foot. Give me that foot, it looks delicious."
Family Guy
"Don't... Don't eat my foot. Oh, God."
Family Guy
"Oh, it is so hard to find funny women, and you are hilarious."
Family Guy
"Oh, you're like a female Bonnie Hunt."
Family Guy
"Sit right there, honey."
Family Guy
"Mommy will go get Rupert so he can eat with you."
Family Guy
"Oh, God. Thoughtful."
Family Guy
"Oh, hey, Lois, I made coffee if you want some."
Family Guy
"Oh, thank you, Brian. That'd be nice."
Family Guy
"Hey, Brian, listen, I've got a favor to ask."
Family Guy
"Could you..."
Family Guy
"- Could you not talk to Lois anymore? - What?"
Family Guy
"You know, it's just I'm tired of you hitting on her."
Family Guy
"That's all."
Family Guy
"It's... I mean, it's not cool."
Family Guy
"I was just making coffee. I didn't hit on her."
Family Guy
"Besides, Lois is my friend. I'll do whatever the hell I want."
Family Guy
"I'm asking you nicely, Brian."
Family Guy
"- Stop hitting on her. - That's ridiculous."
Family Guy
"- I see the way you look at her... - Just 'cause you're a mama's boy..."
Family Guy
"...stop! Lois is my queen, man. - Kissing up to her, monopolizing her..."
Family Guy
"- Keep hitting on my woman... - You know what, fine! I do hit on Lois!"
Family Guy
"And another... What?"
Family Guy
"Sorry, I fell asleep watching Sabado Gigante last night."
Family Guy
"Lois, you know what we should do right now?"
Family Guy
"We should play restaurant with my Play-Doh."
Family Guy
"I'll make you a hamburger."
Family Guy
"Perhaps I'll make it blue. Oh, can you imagine such a world?"
Family Guy
"Uh, Stewie, I love you, but you're wearing Mommy out."
Family Guy
"Now, it's time for bed."
Family Guy
"Hey, Lois, I have a secret for you."
Family Guy
"You're awesome."
Family Guy
"Our top story, a local woman loses her sex drive"
Family Guy
"after a $125 dinner at Alfredo's."
Family Guy
"But first in medical news, Dr. Elmer Hartman,"
Family Guy
"beloved family doctor to all of Quahog, is the target of a molestation lawsuit."
Family Guy
"The trial is set to begin tomorrow."
Family Guy
"We now return you to Native American What's Happening!"
Family Guy
"- Hey, Rerun, you see Dwayne? - Not today."
Family Guy
"- Oh, here he come. - How, how, how."
Family Guy
"Peter, I don't know how much more I can take."
Family Guy
"Stewie used to be so independent,"
Family Guy
"but now he just clings to me night and day."
Family Guy
"I'm exhausted."
Family Guy
"Oh, look at me, I'm Lois. The sun revolves around me."
Family Guy
"I'm the one who's got to go to court tomorrow."
Family Guy
"Peter, isn't there anything I can do to talk you out of this lawsuit?"
Family Guy
"Hey, I was violated sexually, and that man is going to pay."
Family Guy
"And I suppose it wouldn't matter if I told you for the 50th time"
Family Guy
"that it's a legitimate medical procedure to test for cancer."
Family Guy
"Lois?"
Family Guy
"Lois? Lois? Lois? Lois? Lois?"
Family Guy
"Mom? Mom? Mom?"
Family Guy
"Mommy? Mommy? Mommy?"
Family Guy
"Mama? Mama? Mama?"
Family Guy
"Ma? Ma? Ma? Ma?"
Family Guy
"Mum? Mum? Mum? Mum?"
Family Guy
"Mummy? Mummy? Mama? Mama? Mama?"
Family Guy
"- What? - Hi."
Family Guy
"Is it not true that you went to see Dr. Hartman for a simple prostate exam?"
Family Guy
"No, I went for a flu shot."
Family Guy
"At first, I thought he was nice and that he was kind of handsome."
Family Guy
"I trusted him, and then he told me to bend over."
Family Guy
"And then, I just felt like something was wrong."
Family Guy
"I tried to get him to stop, but he kept saying, Relax, I'm a doctor."
Family Guy
"- This is ridiculous. That never happened. - Sit down, you rapist!"
Family Guy
"Oh, I'm sorry."
Family Guy
"I'm supposed to wait until I've heard everything."
Family Guy
"- Go ahead, Mr. Griffin. - And that's when things got bad."
Family Guy
"He made me feel so dirty."
Family Guy
"Relax, I'm a doctor."
Family Guy
"Your Honor, I can't believe you're even listening to this."
Family Guy
"For God's sake, you're a patient of mine."
Family Guy
"I gave you a prostate exam last year, don't you remember?"
Family Guy
"Come to think of it, I remember it as a pretty standard exam."
Family Guy
"Are you sure, Judge?"
Family Guy
"Are you sure it wasn't all evil and grainy and black and white? Think about it."
Family Guy
"Relax. I be a doctor."
Family Guy
"Guilty, guilty, guilty, guilty!"
Family Guy
"Dr. Hartman, your medical license is hereby revoked."
Family Guy
"That's outrageous!"
Family Guy
"God, I've looked forward to this moment more than the second coming of Jesus."
Family Guy
"Okay, everybody,"
Family Guy
"I know you were expecting something else,"
Family Guy
"but as science will tell you, people were a lot shorter 2,000 years ago,"
Family Guy
"so let's try to be adult about this."
Family Guy
"Uh, no snickering and..."
Family Guy
"Hey, that's exactly what I'm talking about."
Family Guy
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