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Clips from The Goldbergs - Snow Day (S04E04)

"The one who oppresses us by ruling over the popcorn,"
The Goldbergs
"temperature and remote control."
The Goldbergs
"He always makes me watch Hee Haw!"
The Goldbergs
"Hee Haw, Barry!"
The Goldbergs
"We discovered something new in that ice fort."
The Goldbergs
"That Dad's vulnerable."
The Goldbergs
"And when we mess with him, it's super fun."
The Goldbergs
"I agree. It was joyous."
The Goldbergs
"But we're back in the house now. It's over."
The Goldbergs
"Or do we continue the good times and laughter forever?"
The Goldbergs
"You mean mess with Dad"
The Goldbergs
"outside the whimsical world of the snow fort?"
The Goldbergs
"Of course! Now we know he's all bark and no bite."
The Goldbergs
"I bet he doesn't even think we're morons."
The Goldbergs
"But that's his hurtful catchphrase."
The Goldbergs
"From this moment on, I say we do the things that annoy him"
The Goldbergs
"and entertain us."
The Goldbergs
"Like sitting in his chair"
The Goldbergs
"or leaving that last drop in the orange juice container?"
The Goldbergs
"Damn right! It's a snow day revolution!"
The Goldbergs
"ADULT ADAM: And our first battle was this."
The Goldbergs
"You two are grounded! No telephone! No Atari!"
The Goldbergs
"No robits! Now get upstairs!"
The Goldbergs
"- Want to go sledding? - Sure."
The Goldbergs
""Sledding"? Didn't you hear what I just said?"
The Goldbergs
"Oh, we heard it. It's just... (CHUCKLES) We're gonna pass on the grounding."
The Goldbergs
"(BOTH LAUGH)"
The Goldbergs
"What the hell just happened?"
The Goldbergs
"ADULT ADAM: What happened was a revolution."
The Goldbergs
"My brother and I were in full rebellion mode,"
The Goldbergs
"and we were ready to take it up a notch."
The Goldbergs
"Bevy! Where's my tin of holiday popcorn?"
The Goldbergs
"Looking for something? Mmm! Flavored-corn deliciousness."
The Goldbergs
"What have you done?"
The Goldbergs
"Looks like you're not the only one"
The Goldbergs
"who can enjoy four types of gourmet popcorn whenever he wants."
The Goldbergs
"You better not have touched white cheddar."
The Goldbergs
"Oh, I touched the white cheddar but good."
The Goldbergs
"That quadrant was for dads only!"
The Goldbergs
"- Seriously, what's wrong with you? - Yo, Ad-rock!"
The Goldbergs
"ADULT ADAM: And then we went where no Goldberg had gone before."
The Goldbergs
"You chilly? I sure am."
The Goldbergs
"Might as well just crank up this bad boy."
The Goldbergs
"Hey, you know no one touches that thermostat."
The Goldbergs
"It stays locked in at a comfortable 63 degrees, no higher!"
The Goldbergs
"Eighty-seven. Temperature of the rich."
The Goldbergs
"Eighty-seven degrees? What do you think this is, the sun?"
The Goldbergs
"We reign over the thermostat now."
The Goldbergs
"Okay, you saw me at a low point,"
The Goldbergs
"and now you're giving me a taste of my own medicine."
The Goldbergs
"(MUFFLED) So good. Sweet and savory."
The Goldbergs
"Damn it, stop eating all the caramel!"
The Goldbergs
"No can do."
The Goldbergs
"You see, until now, your main weapon was dad rage,"
The Goldbergs
"but that all changed when your middle-aged body"
The Goldbergs
"corked up our snow tunnel."
The Goldbergs
"Nothing has changed, nothing."
The Goldbergs
"(CHUCKLING) Oh, it has."
The Goldbergs
"We went into that snow fort as scared boys,"
The Goldbergs
"but we emerged as fearless men who now find your anger silly."
The Goldbergs
"Fine. You don't want to respect me? I'm out."
The Goldbergs
"I retire from being involved in your lives in any way."
The Goldbergs
"Trust me, there will be a time"
The Goldbergs
"when you come to me in desperate need of your dad,"
The Goldbergs
"and I won't help you."
The Goldbergs
"ADULT ADAM: Our snow day rebellion had worked."
The Goldbergs
"The balance of power had shifted in our house,"
The Goldbergs
"and we were kings!"
The Goldbergs
"Dear God. You were right."
The Goldbergs
"We can mess with Dad out of the snow fort, too."
The Goldbergs
"I feel so alive and sweaty from the heat!"
The Goldbergs
"This must be what the other Adam Goldberg in school"
The Goldbergs
"feels like all the time."
The Goldbergs
"He's a loose cannon, and lives on his own terms!"
The Goldbergs
"Dude! Now we can finally live our snow day"
The Goldbergs
"the way the gods of winter intended it!"
The Goldbergs
"Car toboggan."
The Goldbergs
"It combines the fun of water-skiing with the treacherous danger of luge."
The Goldbergs
"I like what I'm hearing."
The Goldbergs
"Sit down and hold on"
The Goldbergs
"'cause I'm gonna drive fast and take chances."
The Goldbergs
"(ENGINE STARTS)"
The Goldbergs
"Snow day!"
The Goldbergs
"Life without a dad rules!"
The Goldbergs
"ADULT ADAM: As we set out on our fatherless snow day,"
The Goldbergs
"my sister was doing everything she could to avoid our mom."
The Goldbergs
"Mom isn't down here, is she?"
The Goldbergs
"I haven't felt her looming presence in over an hour, so you're safe."
The Goldbergs
"Thank God."
The Goldbergs
"That woman finding out that she's my hero"
The Goldbergs
"is the worst thing that's ever happened to me."
The Goldbergs
"Speaking of heroes,"
The Goldbergs
"have I told you about all my rich life adventures?"
The Goldbergs
"Yes, many times."
The Goldbergs
"I bet you didn't know that after the army,"
The Goldbergs
"I joined the USO and entertained the troops"
The Goldbergs
"with a death-defying circus act."
The Goldbergs
"I need help, Pops, not your old-man yarns."
The Goldbergs
"They're not yarns! I trained a lion. His name was Stan."
The Goldbergs
"There you are, boopie. I need your fashion expertise."
The Goldbergs
"Which iron-on should I put on my purple jumpsuit?"
The Goldbergs
"Me, as the wind beneath your wings or we're two peas in a pod?"
The Goldbergs
"Hmm. I pick none."
The Goldbergs
"Well, you got to pick one"
The Goldbergs
"so we can wear 'em on our ski trip this weekend."
The Goldbergs
"Let's be clear, I am going skiing with Lainey,"
The Goldbergs
"and also 10 boys who I know a little bit."
The Goldbergs
"And your hero. I'm sure you want me to tag along."
The Goldbergs
"In what world does that make sense?"
The Goldbergs
"If Barry went on a ski trip,"
The Goldbergs
"he'd want to bring his hero, Chuck Norris,"
The Goldbergs
"and Adam would definitely want to ski with Crispin Glover."
The Goldbergs
"So, it makes perfect sense that you would want to bring your hero. Me."
The Goldbergs
"Okay, weird Crispin Glover doesn't ski,"
The Goldbergs
"and Chuck Norris likes a desert climate,"
The Goldbergs
"so you're not going!"
The Goldbergs
"I get it."
The Goldbergs
"It's embarrassing having your mom as your hero."
The Goldbergs
"But don't worry, I can be cool."
The Goldbergs
"Hang with the hunkos in the bubbly tub"
The Goldbergs
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