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Clips from The Goldbergs - Snow Day (S04E04)

"ADULT ADAM: Back in the '80s,"
The Goldbergs
"there was nothing more exciting than the chance of a snow day."
The Goldbergs
"We all remember the morning ritual."
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"You'd wake up at dawn, hop out of bed at lightning speed,"
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"rush downstairs, grab your radio and pray to the snow gods."
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"REPORTER: The following schools are closed in Montgomery County..."
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"It's gonna happen. I can feel it."
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"Shut up. You're gonna jinx it."
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"Please, God, if you give us a snow day,"
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"I promise I'll be a good boy for the rest of my life."
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"REPORTER: Abington High, closed. Germantown West, closed."
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"William Penn Academy, open."
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"- Balls! - Why?"
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"I'm back to being a bad boy. This is on you, Mother Nature."
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"ADULT ADAM: Sadly, we were that one school that never closed for snow."
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"REPORTER: Abington High, closed. Germantown West, closed..."
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"- Please, please, please. - Say it. Say, "Closed.""
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"I will fist-punch the radio if you don't say "closed.""
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"REPORTER: William Penn Academy, open."
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"- Balls! Balls! - I hate everything!"
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"I'm a man of my word!"
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"Ow!"
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"ADULT ADAM: Every time, it was the same heartbreak."
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"Until the snow gods finally showed mercy."
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"REPORTER: William Penn Academy, closed."
The Goldbergs
"Wait. Am I still asleep, or did he just say William Penn is closed?"
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"He said "closed." School is closed."
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"This is the best day of my life!"
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"(LAUGHING AND CHEERING)"
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"I feel so alive!"
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"(LAUGHING)"
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"Yeah! Snow day means a full day of snuggle time with Mama!"
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"- Yeah! - BEVERLY: Get in here! Get it!"
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"I'm so happy, I don't have the will to fight her off!"
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"(LAUGHING)"
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"ALL: (CHANTING) Snow day! Snow day! Snow day!"
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"(SINGING) I'm twisted up inside"
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"But nonetheless I feel the need to say"
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"I don't know the future"
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"But the past keeps getting clearer every day"
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"ADULT ADAM: It was snow day, 1980-something,"
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"ADULT ADAM: It was snow day, 1980-something,"
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"and my sister was seizing the day."
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"- By sleeping through it. - Aah!"
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"Oh, good. You're finally up."
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"God! What the hell?"
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"Someone was snoring the day away, lazybones."
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"Mom, today is a day"
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"that's been gifted to me by the universe."
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"Please don't ruin it by being you."
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"You only have one more college essay left to write"
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"and then you're done."
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"That has nothing to do with snow day."
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"Of course it does."
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"You're physically trapped in the house with me,"
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"and all the roads and stores are closed."
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"Yay! Let's get you into Penn State."
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"No! Put away the word processor. I am not writing my college essay."
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"Squishy, I can help you. I read the topic."
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""Describe a personal hero who's changed the course of your life.""
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"- Mom, stop. - Let's brainstorm."
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"What makes a hero? Hmm."
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"Someone who's great at crafting, matchmaking,"
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"parming chicken or shrimp or eggplant or meatballs."
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"Listen, I did write about someone in the family, but it's a "he.""
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"Yay! It's me! I am he, and he is me."
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"Bevy, she clearly picked someone else."
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"Perhaps a decorated war vet"
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"who had a date with two different Shirleys last night."
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"- That's right. - Pops? (SCOFFS)"
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"You picked the random old guy"
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"who just hangs around our house all day,"
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"eating our smoked fish?"
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"(CHUCKLES) Choo-choo!"
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"Next stop, Lametown."
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"Hey, I liberated an entire country. I helped save lives."
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"(IMITATES SNORING)"
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"Oh! Oh, sorry, I drifted off to sleep there."
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"Okay, this turned ugly fast."
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"Now, if you'll excuse me,"
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"I have a full day of doing nothing ahead of me."
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"I honestly don't see a world where it's anyone but me."
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"But thank you for your service."
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"ADULT ADAM: My mom would stop at nothing to be Erica's hero."
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"Meanwhile, me and Big Tasty started our snow day"
The Goldbergs
"with an epic cartoon marathon."
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"Whoa, whoa, whoa!"
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"Did you two get into my four-quadrant popcorn tin?"
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"Relax. We were just sniffing it."
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"Stand up and show me your fingers."
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"If I see any cheese dust, you're both grounded."
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"Dust-free. You happy?"
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"Dude, you're unbelievable."
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"Popcorn is the snack of the people."
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"No. It's a snack for dads only."
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"I get one tin a year from my armoire dealer in Cincinnati."
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"It's the only thing that gets me through the season."
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"There are so many sad things in that sentence,"
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"but I honestly think the winner is "Cincinnati.""
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"Well, just keep your hands off the tin."
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"That's it. End of story."
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"And the same goes for the thermostat. Yeah, I see you two looking."
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"That's 'cause it's colder in this house"
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"- than it is outside. - Yeah, man."
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"Can't you spare, like, two more degrees?"
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"If you two are so cold, go out and shovel the walkway."
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"That ought to work up a sweat, but good."
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"(BOTH SIGH)"
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"ADULT ADAM: Murray Goldberg had a lot of dumb dad rules,"
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"but nothing equalled his hard line on snow."
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"And no monkeying around out there when you're done."
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"This weather is treacherous."
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"Oh, here we go."
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"Another lecture on the dangers of cold weather."
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"I'm serious. It's not safe out there."
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"You got frostbite, avalanches and deadly icicles."
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"Icicles aren't deadly. They're refreshing and delicious."
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"They're knives that can fall from the sky at any moment."
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"Sky knives! They kill a billion people a year!"
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"- That seems high. - Dad, come on. It's snow day."
The Goldbergs
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