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Clips from Abbott Elementary - Zoo Balloon (S01E01)

"- Yeah. - Oh."
Abbott Elementary
"Yeah, they got a problem with me not doing more of them."
Abbott Elementary
"- Wait. What? - Oh, man."
Abbott Elementary
"I didn't want to jinx it by telling you, but..."
Abbott Elementary
"they want me to do a whole tour,"
Abbott Elementary
"like, every elementary school in New York"
Abbott Elementary
"and record a whole album of, like, anti-meth songs"
Abbott Elementary
"called "Meth-od To My Madness.""
Abbott Elementary
"- Oh! - It just got confirmed."
Abbott Elementary
"Oh, my goodness!"
Abbott Elementary
"Everybody catchin' F.A.D.E. fades."
Abbott Elementary
"- Oh, my God. - Oh, my gosh, Tariq!"
Abbott Elementary
"- This is incredible! - I know, it's wild."
Abbott Elementary
"It's crazy to think that I, Tariq Temple,"
Abbott Elementary
"could single-handedly stop drug use in all of America."
Abbott Elementary
"Well, I am really proud of you, baby."
Abbott Elementary
"This is everything you've been working for."
Abbott Elementary
"It's everything we've been working for."
Abbott Elementary
"- Yeah. (laughs) - This is crazy."
Abbott Elementary
"So, does this mean that you're going to be"
Abbott Elementary
"working full-time in New York City?"
Abbott Elementary
"I mean, yeah, at least for, like, the next year, right?"
Abbott Elementary
"You know. Whoo! (laughs)"
Abbott Elementary
"Jadakiss don't even know, but we 'bout to have, like,"
Abbott Elementary
"the craziest rap beef in rap beef history."
Abbott Elementary
"'Cause you know, he stole my laugh."
Abbott Elementary
"A-ha! A-ha!"
Abbott Elementary
"She doesn't know about that. Yeah."
Abbott Elementary
"Well, this is just such amazing news, Tariq. Wow."
Abbott Elementary
"Yeah. I gotta call 'em back."
Abbott Elementary
"- (laughs) - (chuckles)"
Abbott Elementary
"- We moving to New York, baby! - Wait. What?"
Abbott Elementary
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I gotta talk to, uh, Mr. F.A.D.E."
Abbott Elementary
"What do you mean there's no Mr. F.A.D.E.?"
Abbott Elementary
"(indistinct conversations)"
Abbott Elementary
"- Two, three... - There you go. Right there."
Abbott Elementary
"Yeah. When I move, you move."
Abbott Elementary
"CHILDREN: Just like that!"
Abbott Elementary
"- Uh, yeah, that's all of them. - Yeah."
Abbott Elementary
"- I can hear it. - Come on, let's go."
Abbott Elementary
"- Come on, guys. - Okay. So, what's your plan?"
Abbott Elementary
"I don't know. I mean, New York is really far."
Abbott Elementary
"Far for me, anyway."
Abbott Elementary
"I've never lived anywhere outside of Philly."
Abbott Elementary
"And, I don't know, there are a lot of schools there"
Abbott Elementary
"that could use a teacher like me."
Abbott Elementary
"But I just refilled my transit pass, and..."
Abbott Elementary
"I don't know, maybe this is just, like, that moment --"
Abbott Elementary
"Okay. I just meant what exhibit did you plan on hitting first?"
Abbott Elementary
"Oh, um, the flamingos?"
Abbott Elementary
"Oh, hey, 'Neen!"
Abbott Elementary
"That's the best neck I ever seen. Look."
Abbott Elementary
"- Come on. - MELISSA: Okay, kids, come on."
Abbott Elementary
"Let's play a game called "How many animals do you spot"
Abbott Elementary
"on the way to getting Ms. Schemmenti a hot pretzel?""
Abbott Elementary
"This one looks best on me. (chuckles)"
Abbott Elementary
"Now take a candid of me walking in,"
Abbott Elementary
"and I'll tell you when."
Abbott Elementary
"('80s rock music plays)"
Abbott Elementary
"♪"
Abbott Elementary
"Oh!"
Abbott Elementary
"You like dancing?"
Abbott Elementary
"Well, this dance is called "the vac it up.""
Abbott Elementary
"I heard it's going viral."
Abbott Elementary
"You, plug it in."
Abbott Elementary
"I want y'all to take turns and have fun."
Abbott Elementary
"All right, children, get ready to see my favorite animal --"
Abbott Elementary
"the tuatara!"
Abbott Elementary
"It's a lizard that arrived here at the zoo"
Abbott Elementary
"the same year I started teaching."
Abbott Elementary
"What? Where's..."
Abbott Elementary
"Oh, excuse me. Where's Duster?"
Abbott Elementary
"Oh, he's in a reserve."
Abbott Elementary
"When the stimulation here gets to be too much,"
Abbott Elementary
"- we retire them. - Retire them?"
Abbott Elementary
"But he's been here as long as I've been coming."
Abbott Elementary
"Cycle of life."
Abbott Elementary
"Oh."
Abbott Elementary
"Melissa, they have retired my Duster."
Abbott Elementary
"Retired like my Uncle Anthony"
Abbott Elementary
"or retired like my Uncle Tony?"
Abbott Elementary
"It's just a lizard, Barb."
Abbott Elementary
"Duster is a tuatara."
Abbott Elementary
"He is an institution that I have been coming here to visit"
Abbott Elementary
"for 30 years."
Abbott Elementary
"He's been working as long as I have!"
Abbott Elementary
"Retirement?"
Abbott Elementary
"Okay, guys, let's give Mrs. Howard a minute."
Abbott Elementary
"Move out."
Abbott Elementary
"And that is how birds are related to dinosaurs."
Abbott Elementary
"CHILDREN: Ooh!"
Abbott Elementary
"Theropods, to be exact, which means they're bipedal."
Abbott Elementary
"Come on. Do your job, son."
Abbott Elementary
"- (scoffs) - Macaws need a variety..."
Abbott Elementary
"Hey. Kenny, how you doing?"
Abbott Elementary
"You, uh, enjoying learning about that bird life?"
Abbott Elementary
"I guess."
Abbott Elementary
"You know, Kenny, I hear you're worried"
Abbott Elementary
"about going to the second grade."
Abbott Elementary
"But it really isn't that big a change."
Abbott Elementary
"It's, like, two nickels' worth."
Abbott Elementary
"Yeah, you'll have all the same friends,"
Abbott Elementary
"and it'll be in the same place."
Abbott Elementary
"- Really? - Yeah."
Abbott Elementary
"That's good, I guess."
Abbott Elementary
"Yeah, it isn't like you'd be moving to a new city"
Abbott Elementary
"where you maybe don't know anyone except for one person."
Abbott Elementary
"And maybe that person isn't even thinking"
Abbott Elementary
"about how this is gonna affect you."
Abbott Elementary
"It's just crazy."
Abbott Elementary
"All right. Let's regroup after the bird show, all right?"
Abbott Elementary
"That's a parakeet."
Abbott Elementary
"(sighs)"
Abbott Elementary
"How's Kenny?"
Abbott Elementary
"Oh."
Abbott Elementary
"He's okay. Um..."
Abbott Elementary
"Definitely scared, but I get it."
Abbott Elementary
"Change can be scary."
Abbott Elementary
"But you know that better than anyone --"
Abbott Elementary
"you know, as a sub."
Abbott Elementary
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