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Clips from 30 Rock - Jack Gets in the Game (S02E02)

"He came out of nowhere."
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"What diet is gonna do that?"
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"But I can eat all the paper I want, so..."
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"You are just as beautiful and talented as you ever were."
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"No. No, no, no. You are fat."
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"How come men can be heavy and be respected?"
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"Like James Gandolfini or Fat Albert?"
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"and America needs to get over its body-image madness."
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"Oh, come on."
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"Let's go to the common room and talk about apartheid."
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"I'm sorry if I care about making the world a better place."
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"You should be. It's a complete waste of time,"
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"and it prevents you from dealing with this."
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"Excuse me. What about "this" do I have to deal with?"
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"How's your love life going?"
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"I believe that love comes to you when you're not looking for it."
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"I'm gonna sell it online, but my Internet is being weird."
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"Have you even set that up yet?"
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"I missed a dentist appointment this morning."
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"What are you doing in town?"
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"Were you drawn to the phallic nature of our skyline?"
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"Very funny, Jack."
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"What?"
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"As in Don Geiss' daughter."
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"No. Not anymore, friend."
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"You mean the cult that was invented by Stan Lee?"
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"You see, it's my faith in Practicology"
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"that has helped me uncover my true straight self."
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"I can totally feel the gay draining right out of me."
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"By the eye of Zolnak, right, guys?"
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"That's right."
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"in the "Harvard Gay Business Review,""
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"But I guess I'll find out more about that tonight at dinner."
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"Yo, Ken."
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"Oh. Okay."
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"But I want her to know I'm having a good time on my own,"
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"The pointy kind."
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"Mr. Jordan, can't you just apologize to her?"
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"No! Things have been said that cannot be taken back."
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"She called my vanity license plate inscrutable!"
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""I see you ate one. Am l"?"
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"Angie is in the past,"
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"like Dracula and broadcast television."
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"I think you're letting your pride get in the way."
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"I mean, if you saw Angie with another man..."
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"Nah, whatever."
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"She should find someone new."
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"Well, I don't know, but it's worth a shot."
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"your weight puts you in what we call the disgusting range."
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"How important is tooth retention to you?"
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"And there are some wonderful crazy surgical options."
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"I've sent a number of my famous clients there."
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"Oh, thank you, Leo."
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"This, right here, is why I got into medicine."
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"We all have our secrets."
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"Devin's pretending to be straight."
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"I'm trying to keep my heart episode under wraps."
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"And Alan Garkel in legal?"
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"I don't think he needs that wheelchair."
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"No!"
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"Mr. Banks, Mr. Donaghy eats guys like you"
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"as part of a healthy breakfast."
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"Heart attack? Really?"
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"High five!"
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"Plus bone shaving and organ reduction."
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"Ugh!"
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"People look at me differently now."
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"Jack, the writers, the manager at Forever 21."
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"What? No."
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"She's gonna play all the characters she usually plays."
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"Like Hillary Clinton."
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"That's awesome. "Fat Hillary.""
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"She can be like, "Me want food!""
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"No one is saying, "Me want food," Frank."
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"We are going to showcase Jenna's talents."
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"Can I sing and rollerdance?"
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"Yes."
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"Don't you have things to do in your own life?"
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"At least I don't live with my mom. Ow!"
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"I've got my life together, okay?"
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"Holy crap! Did your tooth just fall out?"
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"That's not great, huh?"
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"My gold record from that novelty party song."
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"Spooky, scary?"
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"Is there anything else you want to say, Tracy?"
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"Yeah."
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"Ugh!"
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"I hear you're single now. That's cool."
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"Uh-huh."
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"Oh, I will. I'll come over at night."
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"You should see my A-game."
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"Next time he does it,"
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"I'm marching that little bastard to a recruiting station."
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"Great story, Dad!"
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"Don! Devin!"
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"Jack! Small world. Join us."
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"Me want food!"
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"Come on, Jack. I'd never rat you out."
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"Here."
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"That's not what I hear."
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"up at the house on Saturday."
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"It's gonna be a whole day of team sports and beer."
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"You're up early, Mr. Jordan."
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"I only got 11 or 12 hours sleep last night."
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"I got something on my mind-grapes"
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"Oh. What is it, sir?"
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"Seeing you with her, it opened my eyes."
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"it wasn't fair to her."
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"So you got to make it fair."
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"I want you to go to my house and make love to my wife, Ken."
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"'cause we live on DaCrib Avenue."
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"And you make sure you pleasure her."
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"Well, they did laugh."
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"You just can't be a real woman in this country."
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"God! It's like those Dove commercials never even happened."
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"This woman was a Mouseketeer, ma'am."
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"Let it go, Liz."
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"Me want food!"
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"My own T-shirt!"
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"Very good. Very nice."
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