Loading...
You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.

Clips from 30 Rock - TGS Hates Women (S05E05)

"but the doctor said if I keep doing it"
30 Rock
"my ocular muscles might spasm"
30 Rock
"and eject my eyeballs."
30 Rock
"You're wrong. I support women."
30 Rock
"I'm like a human bra!"
30 Rock
"Which is why I want to hire"
30 Rock
"a young comic named Abby Flynn"
30 Rock
"to come on as a guest writer."
30 Rock
"No, you are not budgeted..."
30 Rock
"She's got good energy. Hire her immediately."
30 Rock
"See? I'm not threatened by the fact that men are attracted to her."
30 Rock
"Please, Lemon. It's got nothing to do with her hot mouth."
30 Rock
"Every organization needs new blood once in a while."
30 Rock
"Like Hank Hooper says in his book,"
30 Rock
""New blood is the lifeblood of every company's blood.""
30 Rock
"But he won't be forever."
30 Rock
"And some day, when he steps down,"
30 Rock
"I intend to succeed him."
30 Rock
"Well, believe in yourself,"
30 Rock
"and you'll reach your goals."
30 Rock
"I read that on a bottle"
30 Rock
"of women's exercise water."
30 Rock
"It's not so simple. KableTown is a family-owned company."
30 Rock
"so to get what I want, I must find a way to destroy her."
30 Rock
"Her? It's a woman?"
30 Rock
"Well, not exactly."
30 Rock
"and I'm waiting in line to meet"
30 Rock
"How old is Hank's wife? Is it a second marriage?"
30 Rock
"Why do men always marry someone younger?"
30 Rock
"- Because they can, Liz! - Get a grip, Lemon!"
30 Rock
"Kaylie is Hanks Hooper's granddaughter."
30 Rock
"Her parents' generation was lost to "Trust Fund Kids" disease."
30 Rock
"The aunt smokes pot and "paints,""
30 Rock
"and her father is trying to sail"
30 Rock
"an inflatable castle across the Atlantic."
30 Rock
"So you're trying to destroy a 14-year-old?"
30 Rock
"I am trying to guide a 14-year-old."
30 Rock
"Maybe I can help her realize some other life goal."
30 Rock
"To become a doctor's nurse, or a lawyer's mistress,"
30 Rock
"Wow. Typical."
30 Rock
"because "potential" is the difference between what you can't do"
30 Rock
"and what can't you do!"
30 Rock
"Did you get that off of a bottle of water?"
30 Rock
"No, I sent it in but AquaFem did not choose it!"
30 Rock
"Okay, word is this Abby Flynn thing is really happening."
30 Rock
"She does not know how much we suck."
30 Rock
"But she'll find out soon enough."
30 Rock
"I don't know, how long does it take to see something?"
30 Rock
"No, duh. Being ourselves doesn't work."
30 Rock
"I'm going to pretend to be rich."
30 Rock
"And I'll be a dangerous bad boy."
30 Rock
"'Cause chicks dig British guys."
30 Rock
"That dude must be knee-deep in boob!"
30 Rock
"And if you guys don't go along with this,"
30 Rock
"Lutz will play X-Box Kinect with his shirt off again."
30 Rock
"Rich. Bad boy. British. Got it."
30 Rock
"Now, you may have heard of J. Fred Muggs,"
30 Rock
"the chimpanzee that was on the "Today" show in the '50s."
30 Rock
"But what most people don't know is that NBC is still a network."
30 Rock
"Speaking of television, is that a field you'd like to go into, Kaylie?"
30 Rock
"Work with your grandfather?"
30 Rock
"I agree. TV is boring."
30 Rock
"So do you have a favorite subject in school, Kaylie?"
30 Rock
"You don't want to hear about school. It's dumb."
30 Rock
"Whatchoo talkin' 'bout, Kaylie? School's cool."
30 Rock
"Just like Justin Bee-eye-bear."
30 Rock
"Well, I've never told anyone in my family this before,"
30 Rock
"but my dream is to be a marine biologist."
30 Rock
"My favorite fish is the cleaner wrasse!"
30 Rock
"And I even tried to get it chosen as our school mascot,"
30 Rock
"but, well, I was outvoted, so our new mascot is a slut."
30 Rock
"You've probably never heard of the explorer Bob Ballard..."
30 Rock
"You know Dr. Ballard?"
30 Rock
"He discovered the Titanic, the Lusitania,"
30 Rock
"Oh, my gosh, Mr. Donaghy! That'd be so cool!"
30 Rock
"Okay. Now please follow me to Brian Williams' bathroom,"
30 Rock
"which is also J. Fred Muggs' skull!"
30 Rock
"Okay, guys, Abby's on her way up."
30 Rock
"Stop that!"
30 Rock
"Is she here yet?"
30 Rock
"You are married!"
30 Rock
"Okay, this is exactly the kind of male douchebaggery"
30 Rock
"that is about to take a real hit around here."
30 Rock
"Tracy Chapman. She's a woman, right?"
30 Rock
"It's a new era at 'TGS'."
30 Rock
"Let's see the blogosphere try to say I hate women now!"
30 Rock
"Look at all these dudes! I knew I smelled sausage!"
30 Rock
"- Yes! - Abby?"
30 Rock
"Liz! Thank you!"
30 Rock
"Oh, our nips touched! Mine are so hard!"
30 Rock
"Abby, these are the writers."
30 Rock
"I guess I'll have to sit on somebody's lap."
30 Rock
"You can sit there."
30 Rock
"- Eenie... - Please, God."
30 Rock
"- Meenie... - Come to mommy."
30 Rock
"- Minie... - Me, pick me."
30 Rock
"Moe."
30 Rock
"taught me how to roll a cigarette."
30 Rock
"and is going to be the next CEO of KableTown?"
30 Rock
"Nothing. She wants to be a marine biologist!"
30 Rock
"and I know exactly what any 14-year-old science geek wants to do."
30 Rock
"I will never forget what he said to me."
30 Rock
"Huh. I did forget. It was so long time ago."
30 Rock
"When I was a kid I got to meet the "Where's the Beef" lady!"
30 Rock
"With my connections, I can make Kaylie's dreams come true."
30 Rock
"I should dig up my old shell collection and give it to her."
30 Rock
"Complete the seduction after Bob Ballard and I double team her!"
30 Rock
"- Word choice, Jack. - Withdrawn."
30 Rock
"Lemon, is that the new woman you hired?"
30 Rock
"Is it cold in here, or is it just that I'm not wearing underwear?"
30 Rock
"She should be careful around the crew."
30 Rock
"What is that?"
30 Rock
"She's being hot and doing baby talk."
30 Rock
"Summer of '98 I took it to a whole new level!"
30 Rock
"There can't be two of us, Liz. She must be destroyed."
30 Rock
"No, Jenna, that is exactly the problem."
30 Rock
"Exactly. I'll start by spreading a destructive rumor about her."
30 Rock
"Like the famous one I made up about Jamie Lee Curtis."
30 Rock
"That she has two butts!"
30 Rock
"But we're not going to destroy Abby, we're going to fix her..."
30 Rock
Show more clips